Hey WobblyWombatWarrior, welcome. I like your username, Wombats are gorgeous animals.
I'm not sure what you mean by abi and cots.
However, I just wanted to pop in and say I'm sorry you're struggling. You're not a burden to anyone, and you're not overwhelming us, we're all here for you.
I know how you feel, I'm very isolated and lonely myself and I also deal with grief on a daily basis, from people and animals.
Like you, I'm also very negative. I think that's common for those with mental illnesses, it's very hard to be positive.
And you're not worthless either. I hope you're safe and these comments here can somehow help you.