Wellcome to our forums!
Im so sorry you are feeling this way I understand it would be very difficult.
Im sorry for the loss of you Mum.
I understand your business seems to be in trouble and I’m sorry this is happening.
I understand the horrible dark intrusive thoughts…. I also suffered with these when I was in the height of my anxiety, I learned that these thoughts usually accompany anxiety and depression.
I have now recovered from the condition I was going through and with the help I received from professionals these thoughts have now lifted.
The thoughts really scared me.
I highly recommend that you see your gp and discuss the type of thoughts you are experiencing and how you are currently feeling.
You could do a mental health plan together this will enable you to see a psychologist.
Things will get better for you, never loose hope and stay positive.