@ Emmen: thank you for your kind reply. I find yoga boring and repetitive
and not relaxing at all. Guided meditation works sometimes, but usually doesn't do much. I don't like discussing private
stuff with others after being burned several times, which has
contributed to my mental health issues. I have a lot of trust and self-esteem issues.
For years I forced myself to go
out and meet people and, although I met some interesting
people, they’ve either met a partner, moved away, drifted away or I just didn’t
enjoy hanging out with them. In my experience, many people talk about day
to day stuff, like their partner, kids or job. Nobody wants to hear what a
single person has to say because they assume single people don’t have anything
to worry about. If I try and talk about interesting movies, books or anything like
that, they usually joke and say only single people have time for those things.
also met single people, but they all seemed focussed on meeting a partner,
spending most of their free time on dating apps, trying to set up dates and,
the minute they met someone, they disappeared. It's completely fine if that is what they want or need, but it makes it hard for me to find like-minded people.
@Tranzcrybe: thank you for your kind reply. The earliest I can remember is
being in kindy and feeling like nobody really liked me
and wanted to get to know me, that I didn’t belong (like now). Even then I worried all the
time. I don’t even know anymore how to
meet genuine people. It seems to get harder as
you get older.
@Wishes: thank you for your kind reply. I really don’t feel up to doing
anything social online either, it took a lot to register for this forum. I never
comment or post on anything publicly. I just really do not like people at the
moment, as horrible as it sounds. It’s costing me a lot of energy just to get
through the day and I have nothing left to give at the end of the day.
I'm worried it might get worse and there doesn’t
seem to be a solution, so I don’t even know whether there is any point in continuing
with the psychologist and medication. I am interested in a lot of things, but just don’t have the energy for any of them at the moment.
At the end of the day, maybe it does come down to the basics...eat well, try to get enough sleep, don't let people get to you and so on, but it's always so much easier to say these things than to actively do them day after day when you have mental health issues.