Hi again butimstillinlove,
We're sorry to hear that you're feeling so low at the moment, it sounds like this has come as a shock and we can hear how difficult this must be to cope with. But please know that you do not have to do this alone, many in our community have had similar experiences and will be able to understand.
In the meantime, we'd really encourage you to reach out for support, as we mentioned earlier Relationships Australia is a great option. You are also welcome to get in touch with our Support Service, anytime, on 1300 22 4636 or you can visit www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport and one of our friendly counsellors will be able to talk things through with you.
We hope that you can find some comfort in the forums. Feel free to keep us updated here on your thread throughout your journey.