Welcome to the forums, and thank you for being brave enough to share your story.
I am really sorry for what you are going through. Long-distance is probably one of the hardest things to deal with.
My partner and I used to be in a long-distance relationship and I felt the same way as you. I felt as if there was no hope and that I was slowly distancing myself.
Setting a goal with your boyfriend as to when you guys will stop being in a long-distance relationship can really motivate you through it. If there is no goal as to when it will end, then it will be really hard to cope.
Sleep calls, face timing and playing couple games can also make you feel more connected.
Let me know how you feel and please stay safe.