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Forums / Welcome and orientation / New to forums

Topic: New to forums

8 posts, 0 answered
  1. GMarenghi
    GMarenghi avatar
    10 posts
    13 November 2021

    Hi,

    I'm not sure whether I have ever felt "lonely" or whether I've just become accustomed to being alone. Recently I watched a documentary on loneliness based in the UK and one of the stories resonated with me. I'm in my early thirties but basically resigned myself to believing that I will never meet anyone, never get a job, never progress in any meaningful direction. I don't know why my life has turned out like this.

  2. geoff
    Life Member
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    geoff avatar
    16247 posts
    13 November 2021 in reply to GMarenghi

    Hello GMarenghi, and a warm welcome to the forums.

    Loneliness can happen in many ways, and it can happen slowly over a long time, where we don't feel connected with the people we once did, why, well it could be there doing or it could be caused by ourselves and each one of us have our own opinion.

    I'm sorry you feel like this, but here you have friends, whether they reply back to you or just read your comment, people may feel as though they are in the same position as you are currently in.

    I'm about to log off as I start very early in the morning, but will watch out for your comment and as I said you are most welcome here.

    If you want to ask any question please do so, somebody will pick it up and I will be here at midnight.

    Take care.

    Geoff.

    3 people found this helpful
  3. Ggrand
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Ggrand avatar
    9873 posts
    13 November 2021 in reply to GMarenghi

    Hello GMarenghi,

    I would also like to warmly welcome you to the forums along with our lovely Geoff..

    I have felt alone for many years even before my late husband passed away...Since his passing that alone feeling has increased into loneliness which I think is one of the hardest things in life to deal with..

    I have resigned myself to being alone as my marriage wasn’t a good one and I’m now to afraid to trust any one to share my life..

    I’m wondering if you have any passions in life..like hobbies, do you have anything you really enjoy doing, I ask this because maybe you could seek out some groups that enjoy what you do....some groups have outings or get to togethers to share their interests and help others with the some interests...maybe that’s one way to meet like minded people that maybe good friendships can be made..

    I am sorry that you feel loneliness...and hope that in some way we can help you feel less lonely...Most of my friends are here on these wonderful forums..even though I know that our community members can’t meet another member in real life...The friendship I feel here is so real...

    I really do hope that you will keep talking here when you are feeling up to it..,We are here for you Dear GM..

    My kindest thoughts with my care..

    Grandy..

    2 people found this helpful
  4. Mk2692
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    Mk2692 avatar
    106 posts
    13 November 2021 in reply to GMarenghi

    Hi GMarenghi,

    Welcome to the forums and thanks for reaching out. I’m sorry to hear that you are feeling this way. It sounds like you are still very young and have the time ahead of you to meet someone and have a family of your own. The best approach is to put yourself out there, go out with friend and get to know new people. Have you tried online dating? That can sometimes be easier to meet someone.
    In terms of your career, you are still young and can achieve everything you wish. It might take some hard work and dedication, but you will eventually get there. Have you spoken to anyone about your feelings? I would recommend to reach out to a friend or family, as they can support you through what you are going through.
    Everyone sometimes feels lonely even when surrounded by family and friends. It doesn’t necessarily mean we are alone in this world, it means maybe we might need to be comfortable with just being with ourselves. Take yourself out on dates, go walking, hiking or even for lunch. Get to know yourself and hopefully this can put your feelings at ease. Hope this helps.

    1 person found this helpful
  5. GMarenghi
    GMarenghi avatar
    10 posts
    13 November 2021 in reply to geoff

    Hi Geoff,

    Thank you for your kind words. I've been reading other posts on the forums and don't feel quite as alone knowing there's other people facing similar struggles.

    1 person found this helpful
  6. GMarenghi
    GMarenghi avatar
    10 posts
    13 November 2021 in reply to Ggrand

    Hi Grandy,

    Thank you for replying to my post. Sorry to hear about the loneliness you are facing. All I feel that I can say is that I hope that you find healing further along in your journey.

    It seems to me that the internet has changed so much in the past decade+. I don't use social media and actually prefer forums to instant messaging websites, apps, etc. Posts on forums seem to be more genuine a lot of the time.

  7. GMarenghi
    GMarenghi avatar
    10 posts
    13 November 2021 in reply to Mk2692

    Hi Mk2692,

    Thank you for your reply. I haven't tried online dating. I tend to steer clear from social media. Hopefully situations change in the future and more opportunities arrive. I know that by reading posts on the forums I've gained some perspective on different situations and my own. I hope that I can offer posts in the future that are comforting to people. I have days when I feel worse than others, but have to remember that I am still young.

    Your advice has been helpful. Thank you.

  8. geoff
    Life Member
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    geoff avatar
    16247 posts
    14 November 2021 in reply to GMarenghi

    Hello GMarenghi, there are on so many occasions we can feel lonely and it doesn't matter what situation we're in, if your mind is not focused or can't realise that people want to be your friend then you'll feel lonely and most certainly if you feel some type of depression then no amount of people will comfort you, so this needs to be addressed first of all.

    Having confidence within yourself in the belief that any comment is not meant to be said against you, that's it's just a general statement and not aimed at particularly you has to be established.

    People naturally believe that any disparaging comment is aimed at themselves, this is where strength needs to be built and believe that a comment is not aimed at you.

    You need to believe in yourself, then strength will prevail.

    Take care.

    Geoff.

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