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Topic: Sad

4 posts, 0 answered
  1. Miss Mary
    Miss Mary avatar
    1 posts
    15 July 2019

    So so sad all the time, Just can't snap out of it.

    Done all the right things, Drs, meds, counselling.

    I'm losing this battle.

    I just haven't got the energy or mindset to fight anymore

    I don't want to be like this but nothing is helping

    Signed

    Miss Mary

  2. Croix
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    Croix avatar
    10934 posts
    15 July 2019 in reply to Miss Mary

    Dear Miss Mary~

    Welcome here to the Forum, it is a gentle and understanding place. Being sad all the time is a horrible way to be, and having tried doctors, counseling and meds without result is both frustrating and discouraging.

    Do you mind if I ask you about your life? Of course you do not have to say anything at all, but in order to talk with you properly just using generalities seems a pity.

    While I'm busy asking questions has here been a time in the past you did not feel this way? In all the medical matters you have tried was there anything or anyone that seemed a little more on target, or you felt comfortable with?

    You did say say 'snap out of it". I can only relate to my own experience where things were very far from an abrupt change. Things happened slowly, bit by bit.

    I was given books, they were almost kids books as my concentration was lacking, but the helped. For small fragments of time I was in another world with the good living happily ever after and the bad getting their just deserts. It was a start.

    So what can you think of that you have enjoyed and might again. It does not have to be anything big, from a TV show to a pet, - anything.

    I hope we talk some more

    Croix

  3. geoff
    Life Member
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    geoff avatar
    16222 posts
    16 July 2019 in reply to Miss Mary

    Hello Miss Mary, and a warm welcome to the forums.

    It's so difficult when suffering from this illness to 'just snap out of it' and the more someone is told to do this, the harder it may become.

    With all my appointments along with medication, the only way I could overcome all of this was to change direction, so I wonder if you have considered doing this.

    We would really to hear back from you.

    Best wishes.

    Geoff.

  4. therising
    Valued Contributor
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    therising avatar
    2698 posts
    16 July 2019 in reply to Miss Mary

    Hi Miss Mary

    I am often led to feel sorrow when I hear someone is suffering so much.

    You mention, Done all the right things, Drs, meds, counselling. Seeing not much has changed leads me to question whether they were the right doctors, meds and counseling for you. When things don't seem to be working, this can lead to that self-chastising question 'What's wrong with me?!' I believe a far more productive question is 'What's not right?' Words can be incredibly powerful when it comes to our perception. By asking what's wrong, we can face generalising. What's not right involves pinpointing a solution. Such language also involves a more positive take on investigating the complexities that are involved when it comes to how we tick.

    Something's not right if you've been suffering for so long. Is it to be found in the mind (thought processing), body (chemistry) or both? Something's not right if the medication hasn't worked. Why is this the case? Something's not right with the methods involved when it comes to you regaining mental well-being. Why is this so? In looking at what's not right, this focuses less on you in general and more on the external influences.

    I'll give an example how the 'What's not right?' factor can change perception. Although my husband is very loving and typically considerate, there were a couple of instances in the last week which led me to feel down. The 1st involved me being honest and open about why I wasn't feeling affectionate towards him. I suggested maybe it was hormonal, seeing I couldn't pinpoint a logical reason. The 2nd involved us arguing about him wanting to buy a 2nd hand car for a whopping $25,0000. On both occasions I thought 'I'm such a disappointment to people', a terrible generalisation. Just yesterday I got to thinking, 'Hang on, what's not right here?'

    • Regarding the affection, what's not right is the fact that, in my openness and honesty, he accused me of being selfish and was not open to any discussion beyond that
    • Regarding the car, he's always driven a company car with a small weekly fee attached. This past year is the 1st in 16 where we haven't faced significant debt (yay). What's not right is the unnecessary introduction of a new financial stress, on top of 2 sets of braces for our teenagers who have significant dental issues

    What's not right, in my opinion, is the lack of consideration and maturity in both cases.

    Mary, 'What's not right?' is the question that leads us to the right more empowering path.

    Take care

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