I read your post above and those in:
Philophobia? The fear of falling in love
Can I say first off it is a brave thing to come here to a bunch of strangers and describe that is happening to you, hopefully the perspective of others can help.
I've had fear of particular things, and they revolved around experiences I had in the past and I have had a strong desire not to get close in any manner, touching or otherwise, with any other. This was a result of PTSD, depression and anxiety. It respond over time to medical treatment and an understating partner.
I am not saying you are the same as me, one difference is that you do want to have a relationship, but are blocked on one part of it -and realise that it is a problem.
While there may always be different desires in intimacy, and not everyone likes every idea, the fact that you seem to have reluctance with any form of contact would make me think that you too would benefit from competent medical help.
So may I suggest you see your GP in a long consultation and say frankly what has been happening to you? If you find it embarrassing to talk about it face to face then you might like to put it on paper and hand that over.
Then the whole matter can be investigated and hopefully an answer and appropriate treatment found.
In the meantime anyone who genuinely cares for you I'm sure will show patience and understanding - as my partner did - and that will help take some of the pressure off 'solving' the matter really quickly.
Please let me know what you think