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Forums / Grief and loss / Unanswered questions - loss of brother

Topic: Unanswered questions - loss of brother

3 posts, 0 answered
  1. Unanswered questions
    Unanswered questions  avatar
    2 posts
    18 January 2016

    Hello, 

    first off I hope everyone is doing as best as they can as I'm sure we are all here searching for ways to cope and to even understand other people's thoughts and processes. I have recently lost my older brother, he tragically took his own life without much explanation or warning. I do not know how or where to begin but would love to know if there is support groups or places in Adelaide where people who have been through traumatic events can come together as I struggle to relate to my friends as they don't quite get how I feel. As I don't truly understand how I feel... There is numbness, anger, sadness, love, all in one. 

  2. Zeal
    Champion Alumni
    • Community champion volunteers who are not currently active on the forums.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Zeal avatar
    1737 posts
    19 January 2016 in reply to Unanswered questions

    Hi Unanswered questions,

    First off, welcome to the forum, and thank you for your considerate opening comment :)

    I am really sorry to hear about your older brother's tragic passing. I can't imagine what you're going through right now. You are not alone though. Unfortunately suicide is an increasing problem in society. I did a search, and The University of Adelaide has a great page with advice and a general website link at the bottom. Here is the link: https://www.adelaide.edu.au/counselling_centre/resources/brochures/griefandloss.html

    The website on this page, GriefLink, has a Finding Support section in the drop-down menu. Making an appointment with your GP is also a good idea, as they can give you guidance and suggest services and ways of coping with the grief. Keep close to your family, as this is one of the best ways to get through this difficult time. As you've found, it's very hard for others who haven't been in this situation to understand. Your family will share the grief with you, particularly your parents (if they're still here). Sorry, I don't know what stage of life you're in age-wise! Even connecting with family friends and mutual friends of you and your brother could be comforting.

    I hope you can seek support soon :)

    Best wishes,

    SM

     

  3. Neil_1
    Champion Alumni
    • Community champion volunteers who are not currently active on the forums.
    Neil_1 avatar
    4232 posts
    19 January 2016

    Hi there u.q.

     

    Welcome to Beyond Blue and thank you for providing your post.

     

    I wish to extend my sympathies to you regarding your brother.  As you mentioned, you recently lost him and with the words you’ve written I’m guessing there that your grief period is very much still happening.  That’s the thing about loss and the grief process – there is no time limit on it, for everyone is different and we all grieve in our own way and we all will take different time frames.  I could have said after the word frames, “to get over it”, but I never say that because how can you get over something like the loss of a brother or another member of your family or anyone close.  You can’t – you learn to live with it (for the most part).

     

    I’m not sure about the groups that you speak of, but I’m sure there would be those kinds of groups around.  I was thinking that perhaps if you give the Beyond Blue help line a call (the number at the top of each page on Beyond Blue), they may have some better information for you.

     

    But also coming on this site is a very good thing you’ve done – as there are a lot of us who have had our share of loss in our lives and so we know, we understand how this all is.

     

    So if you feel like you’d to unload or to vent about anything, you can do so here and we will read (listen to you) and if possible will try to provide responses back to you – with advice if we can, but we’ll be there to support you for as long as you would like.

     

    Would love to hear back from you.

     

    Kind regards

     

    Neil

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