Hi all,

Depression has backed off a little, i find it a little easier atm to manage and keep away. maybe because my anxiety is more prominent theres not much room for other stuff lol

unfortunately, like Dools said earlier, MI is like a rollercoaster. The depression hits me at random moments and it hurts.

x take care everyone

Hi Chloe

MI is definitely a roller coaster

here for you if you need to talk. Hoping todays just a little easier

Hi Chloe,

It sucks that it's either depression or anxiety, nothing in the middle. Do you have a counsellor or psychologist or someone to talk to?

Hello Kimmikiwi and welcome to the forums. :)

Please feel free to take a look around the forums and post where you feel comfortable. And also your most welcome to start a thread of your own so you can get support for yourself.

G'day Dools.

Sorry to hear about the terrible weekend you've had. Just advise before I begin, I haven't read through the rest of the thread and so I may cover on or come to a conclusion that someone else has already made but none the less I hope you find my input, valid.

I've not got a licence to drive as of yet but I have been used in a similar way to as you've explained. I was used as a living piggy-bank by an ex, she'd disappear for a weekend with her friends, I was left alone at her house. Turns out she was with another man, getting drunk and so on (not that the cheating part is what you're experiencing).

And so I found that during this time, I started to think, a lot. I thought about everything, from why she could've been doing what she was doing to what makes space black. Sitting down and meditating like that allows your brain to lead off on these random tangents and I find it quite, therapeutic. Once I sat down thinking about why my girlfriend was cheating on me but that lead on to thinking about cookies and then the rapper DMX and all sorts of things.

I hope you find this anecdote and advice useful.

Sincerely,

Just another guy.

Hello Everyone,

Yesterday was quite a struggle to get through. I tried to accept my depression, and had an unproductive day watching T.V. snoozing and watching more T.V. and reading for a while.

This morning in bed, I decided I would try to include some achievements today, so I am pleased to say I have washed the car, done some ironing, a load of dishes, made lunch without turning it into charcoal, and have been for a walk.

My cold is slowly getting better. I have a bit more energy which has allowed me to do so many things today.

Mental health issues sometimes surprise me relating to how unexpected some days of depressio0n can be, they seem to drop down out of no where at times, are quite random and don't make a lot of sense when there doesn't seem to be a purpose behind the melancholy.

Like Just a guy mentioned, meditation and distractions are certainly very beneficial. At times reading a book helps me get out of mind. There are times when that is not possible though, that is when I try to use other strategies.

Chloe I like your avatar with the fish! Hope you are feeling a little better and can find ways to accept and reduce the power of your anxiety.

Hi to DB, SN, Grandy and Hi to Kimmikiwi as well.

Hope I haven't missed anyone! I really appreciate everyone dropping by.

I have a week's break from my study, the next section is released on Thursday on the computer.

I am so very pleased today is a lot better than yesterday! I'm getting a little tired of the irrationality of this depression. How dare it just pop up when it feels like it so uninvited!

Cheers all from Dools

Hi Mrs D

sounds like you had a good and productive day! Well done to you.

How is your cold going?

How have you been?

Im glad youve got a weeks break from study. Your brain must be on overload!

Hoping todays a good one for you or at least has some good moments.

Xoxox 🌺🌼🌻🌷🌸

Great hearing todays better than yesterday Doolsy hi btw (by the way) and to everyone ☺

Wow you had a productive day yesterday good on you

😆 yes how rude of depression just popping in uninvited, love stuff you say

Oh good you have a break from studying, need that break I feel.

How's your physical health going Doolsy? Heart Blood pressure and your body.

Keep doing what you do Doolsy, you don't give in. Love it ☺

Care and fond thoughts 🤗💗

Hi Dools (and all)

depression has been quite bad today. I self harmed last night and this morning.

I am going to get this app- it’s called BeyondNow (by beyondblue) and it’s a Suicide safety plan app. It helps you remember reasons to live etc.

i am seeing my psychologist for the first time ever on Saturday. I’m looking forward to going onto the road to recovery!!

x Chloe

Dear Chloe,

I am so very sorry that you have been feeling that down that self harm seemed to be the answer. I do so hope you are okay.

I sort of self harm in different ways, I over do things physically until I am in intense pain with my back injury and binge eat. Neither of those are good options.

Wishing you all the very best with your first ever psychologist appointment. It may help you to write down what is bothering you now and take in what you have written to hand to the psychologist.

The first appointment is generally asking how they can help you and getting a lot of information sorted like stuff regarding your family, what is othering you and so on.

Unfortunately the psychologist can not fix us up in one session! It may not be until your next appointment that you are offered suggestions of what will help you.

If you don't understand anything, ask questions. If you don't agree with something, you are able to share your own opinion.

The psychologist I see has a tissue box and a rubbish bin, those tears can sometimes flow if you want them to or not!

I also like to go for a short walk after the session. If one of your parents are taking you, consider what you might need to do after the session. Sometimes getting straight back in the car and trying to make sense of what just happened can be a little tricky.

Remember no matter what you say to the psychologist, they have no doubt heard it all before and maybe even stuff that is heaps worse.

So just be yourself at your appointment.

All the best to you, from Dools

Hi Everyone,

That week went very quickly, I have now recommenced my study. I have decided I will try my best to complete it and see what happens with the work placement at the end. The module I am working on at present is interesting and deals with having biases towards different people/cultures/beliefs and where they stem from if we have them.

This week I pushed myself to join in with the craft group and had been invited to join some ladies from Church for an afternoon tea as well. I didn't want to go to either, but knew once I was at those places I would probably enjoy myself .

Today was the last session of the Pain Clinic we now have to wait for appointments to see the psychologist and physiotherapist who were part of the education process. So I will see what happens there and will be sure to ask lots of questions.

I also returned to the Op Shop for 3 hours today, I have not been there for a while due to the pain clinic and my cold. The ladies all greeted me warmly, we had lots of laughs and chats so that was lovely. One lady told me it had been very quiet while I was away! I asked her if it was good then that I had returned. Ha. Ha.

DB my Dr has now given me some medication to help with the old ticker so I will see how that goes.

I'm going to the physio tomorrow. It has been a while. My whole back feels like it is in spasm so a bit of treatment will hopefully relax it all a little.

Cheers to you all from Mrs. Dools who feel as old as ever today with all my aches and pains! Ha. Ha.

Hi Mrs D

How are you going? Hoes the studying. .. physio... did you find out what happens after your finished with the pain clinic?

Hey Doolsy and all ☺

Glad you have something for the ticker hope all goes smoothly there. Let us know if ok

Yikes your back sounds in a bad way poor thing. Physio hope that sorts it. So no more pain clinic but good you see the psychs too as part of.

How lovely being missed by your volly ladies. Good on you pushing to go places, its true often when we go we feel ok for it.

Hope your doing ok hun 🤗 and all ☺

Hello dear Startingnew and Demonblaster,

Once again I am not doing all that flash. Yesterday I achieved very little apart from becoming really angry and frustrated with my husband just because he had the audacity to get out of bed! Thankfully he had the sense not to retaliate!

I spent the day crying in bed then watching multiple re-runs of Downton Abbey and consumed vast amounts of chocolate.

I seem to be loosing the will to accept/fight/move on. All I am doing is existing and even that is very tiring at times. I don't know what the answer is anymore! Oh dear I don't know how to do what I know will help.

The education part of the pain clinic is over. Now someone is supposed to contact us for appointments with these support people. Have no idea when that will happen.

Seeing my psychologist today for the possible last time unless I can find the money for paid visits now my mental health care plan visits are done.

Some people say that money can't buy happiness...it is certainly needed if you want some decent medical care!

Wishing you all a bit of happiness in your day! I'm seeing a girlfriend after I have been to the psychologist.

Cheers all from Mrs. D

Hey Mrs D

your not doing so great right now are you.

There are some psychologists bulk bill maybe have a look at a few sites. Some advertise that they bulk bill while others keep it quiet till you ask. Perhaps some investigating on your behalf would give you some more options....

I hope someone from the pain clinic gets in contact with you soon. Pain doesnt help anything at all.

I hope the time with your friend was good and helped to take your mind off things abit....

Hey Mrs D

Just letting you know ive written a post but its not up yet

The hide of hubby. Fancy having the audacity to get outta bed 😅 you crack me up Doolsy. Poor thing 🤗 rough day eh.

Its very hard applying. I find at times I can then I forget but have started doing what you've mentioned at times with taking notes. To hard to try and remember when we're flat isn't it.

Hope todays been brighter for you darl. Something might help when you're down is imagine being in the garden and yanking the swine weeds out, feel them loosen their grip and no physical pain for you but might give you some release.

Where you live might be tricky but aqua excercises could help your poor bod with strengthening and keeping it all in movement but you walk and garden that both are good excercise too.

Have a good evening Doolsy and all ☺⚘

Hi SN, DB and All,

The poor psychologist had quite a session with me yesterday! He wrote down some steps I can take to try and help myself more. I told him right now trying to put the steps into action is difficult. I need to try a little harder I guess.

Yes DB my poor husband must wonder sometimes if it is safe to get up or not! I don't mean to attack him, it just happens. Not all that often so hopefully he copes okay.

My girlfriend and I had quite a wonderful chat after the psychologist appointment. She is supportive and caring which is wonderful.

Today I will be in the Op Shop all day and tonight I will start on the next section of my study so today will be busy.

My Psychologist keeps asking me what I am thinking when I feel so depressed, what has triggered it. Sometimes I have no idea. It is just like someone has flicked a switch in my brain from coping to feeling horrendously depressed instantaneously.

It isn't so much a thought but an overwhelming feeling.

Either way, I need to find ways of putting what helps in place once again.

Cheers all from Dools

Hello Dools

Sending you virtual hugs and blessings. It's been so long since I've dropped by and just realised things aren't too good at the moment.

I know what you mean about that feeling of horrendously depressed instanteously. I get that too. There's no rhyme or reason for it. Just happens. Thankfully, I get 'uplifted' easily too, if I'm distracted by something interesting, amusing or thought provoking.

I wish though those ups and downs were less. Having said that, I'm now looking forward to a camping weekend again. One minute i'm excited, then blah, all the work to get there and the work getting the tent up. LOL. Nah, all good. Sometimes I think it's because of my aches and pains, the physical exertion tires my limbs, muscles, joints. Looking forward though to catching up with some lovely people, beautiful beaches, birds etc.

I'd like to be able to help you stay up for awhile without sinking. From some of your posts I picked up you were feeling a little rejected by your hubby while his friend was around a few weeks back. To be honest, I think having you as their chauffere was awful to say the least. That feeling of rejection can have a huge impact on yourself esteem and self worth. Rejection has been and still is a major thing I deal with on an ongoing basis. You are awesome Mrs Dools and I'm sorry I haven't been around here for awhile.

Have a lovely weekend. Kind thoughts, energy, hugs and blessings coming your way.

PamelaR

Hi PamelaR,

Thanks. If you are still around, I hope your camping trip goes well. Hopefully you are not h4eading tot he coastal areas of S.A. otherwise your tent will be blown all the way to Darwin in the blink of an eye. We are expecting quite a storm here!

I am over the disappointment with my husband and being his driver. As my short term memory is so bad I had actually forgotten about that. Ha. Ha.

Think that is part of the problem, I forget what will help me! Maybe I need to write up another page of things I can do before I hit rock bottom. I had done that before...I have forgotten where I placed my list!

Had a busy day in the Op Shop, didn't have time to feel depressed there! Keeping busy is not always the answer though, it does help at times to distract the mind.

Cheers to you from Dools

WHAT MAY HELP WITH DEPRESSION:

. Accept the negative thoughts as just thoughts that can be changed

. Find a distraction that will provide a sense of achievement

. Read a book or watch a movie

. Phone a friend or family member for a chat

. Write down what is troubling the mind and work out a solution

. Have a cup of tea and sit in the garden

. Go for a walk

. Deep breathes in and out

. Do a Cross word or Sudoku Puzzle

. Have a soak in the bath

. Meditation

. Visualisation

. Use a phone help line if really struggling

Any other dot point ideas are more than welcome!

Cheers all from Dools

Hello Dools

We're off tomorrow, but busy tonight doing things - packing the car etc.

LOL, no we're not headed to SA (thank goodness). Hope it's going to be okay where we are - it is on the coast. Fingers crossed. The long range weather forecast has been good, though a little cold.

I know what you mean about short term memory. It's a bugger hey. Maybe put your list, of things to do when you down, on your fridge door with a fridge magnet or your kitchen cupboard door. Those are places you go to regularly! Or the toilet door (LOL), sorry just couldn't resist that.

BTW - great list.

Speak to you when I return.

Kind regards

PamelaR

Thanks PamelaR,

Happy camping! Will catch up with you when you return.

WHAT MAY HELP WITH DEPRESSION

. cuddle up to a pet or hug a pillow

. write a list of things you would like to achieve today

. acknowledge what you have managed to do

. write a poem or short story about how you are feeling, then write something cheerful or funny

. smile at someone you walk past or encounter

. watch a funny clip on you tube to make you laugh

. invite someone to join you at the movies

. watch children playing in a park, enjoy their happiness

. have a swing yourself or go down the slide

. realise that every day does not have to be a happy day to be a good day!

Hello Dools,

Im sorry you've not been doing so well,

I can relate so much to flicking that switch on which is instant, but turning it off becomes difficult and when we do switch it off, it takes a long time to turn off properly..

I like your list of what may help with depression..I think you have covered nearly everything..but if I can just add..

• I like sitting in a dark room with candles burning and I just sit and watch the little dancing flame, while I have some soft gentle calming music playing.
• Oh and of course..one of Deebi's chocolates, especially the ones she drops...

Dools, have you written a letter to your depressed self, putting some of your good or happy memories in the letter. when you are doing really well...That way you can read when you are really down and remember that you have been feeling okay at times and you will feel okay again...

I hope you enjoy today and you are okay.🤗..and everyone..

Grandy..

Hi Grandy,

Thanks for sharing your suggestions on what helps with depression and for your inspiring thought of writing myself a letter, remembering the good time and happier memories.

Today I have been trying to accept when the negative thoughts come and have tried to nip them in the bud so they don't bloom into something unpleasant.

I've been trying to cook some cakes and goodies today ready for friends on the weekend. My cooking skills are not that excellent, so I have had a double whammy or trying to be positive today! Ha. Ha.

As a teenager I had a dreadful problem with anger management. It escalated when I tried to cook. In one of Mum's cook books I have written a message full of expletives about a recipe I tried and failed at.

Mum likes to bring that cook book out now and then, especially when friends are over and she shows them my descriptive expressions regarding the recipe! Ha. Ha.

To help change the thoughts in my brain, I have been concentrating on my study for a while. That has been a good distraction as I had to come up with scenarios of how to help people when we don't speak the same language.

Regarding the cakes I made today, I am going to get my husband to but some custard and cream from the shops tomorrow! Trifle anyone?

Cheers from Dools

Hello Dools,

I hope your weekend turns out the way you want it to...

Regarding the cakes, Thank your for the idea of trifle. Our biggest Morning tea is coming up in two weeks time..Have you found, if you cook a cake just for you it turns out looking and tasting good, if you cook it for guest, biggest Morning tea etc, it looks and taste like you scraped it of the floor...

I don't go to the event I try but, anxiety is high and I can't forget what they done and said to me when I closed the shop here..I do donate a cake yearly, but it never looks yummy.. This year I'm making some sausage rolls....can't go much wrong their, or can I ?...

I tried accepting the negative thought when it comes in, the emotion seems to effect me before I realise the thought has been..

I like the sound of you mums cooking book...Haha..Do your cook books also have descriptive messages on them..😁..

Hope your week end is good..🌹.

Grandy..

Hi Grandy,

No, I don't seem to have written in any of my cook books! Some pages do have a few food splatters on them though! I heard someone say once while they stayed in someone's home to look after the children, they looked in the cook books on the shelf and found some pages with marks on them and decided those were the recipes that must have been cooked a few times over, so used them.

Sausage Rolls sound lovely. I haven't tried to make those at all.

Yesterday morning I was busy cleaning the patio then went to visit friends for a couple of hours. When I arrived home, I had just parked the car when my sister rocked up surprisingly with her Uncle -in-law and they stayed for lunch and for some of the afternoon.

I was trying not to feel stressed when I had 101 other things I was wanting to do.

This being stressed out and depressed really is no fun when I can't get it under control!

I need to get myself organised now so we have food cooked and prepared!

Cheers all from Dools

Hello Dools,

I like looking through the cook books that are donated to vinnies..Inside some of the books I find hand written recipes especially in the cake and biscuits books..I can only imagine that those recipes must have been at one stage family favourites....What a shame they weren't passed down..

I cheat with the sausage rolls, ready made puff pastry, sausage mince add a chopped up onion, some spices and herbs..mix together then roll in puff pastry...

Dools, take time out to breathe or go outside and look around to ground yourself, then maybe if you need to you can start doing what you need to do...

Im sorry that your having such a struggle with anxiety and depression..I will agree 100% that anxiety and depression is no fun at all...

I hope your day turns out good for you Dools..

Grandy..

Hi Grandy,

Thanks. Not sure what to write right now!

Cheers, from Dools