Thanks Croix & Shell & anyone else listening. The doctor is hoping it is just the muscles which are strained & with the meds rest & gentle exercise it will improve soon. My daughter who checked me on the way to the airport thought it looked like a problem with one of the discs so I'm not sure how long it will take to recover.
When I'm doing things like walking & exploring it takes my mind off things. Also I have difficulty believing I have any value if I'm not doing something useful or helping others so feeling so useless & dependent on others really affects my mental state. feelings of embarrassment, uselessness, being stupid clumsy I'll never be able to plan anything again without the risk of messing it up etc all these thoughts & feelings run through my head.
At the moment I'm home alone as my son had to go out & took his kids & my husband with him. My daughter is supposed to be visiting but hasn't arrived. I become too dopey on the meds to do anything but without them I'm in too much pain. I've just taken some so I've only got a short period before I will become really dopey again.
Sorry I'm grumbling. I feel like I have wasted my time & money coming here under these circumstanses.