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Topic: Sad musings

  1. Ggrand
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    2 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Hello Gentle Peppy,

    Thank you for your kind words,mi so much appreciate them...I feel the same Peppy animals cannot hurt our heart or soul if anything they make our soul grow...

    I will often watch YouTube vids of animals, when I’m feeling down, they are so heartwarming and like you I will cry at times, but I think it’s because of the love the animals show it’s so genuine and warm and they don’t hide their love or feelings they express it so well....

    I hope you are okay Peppy,...I wanted to give you a little gift basket, it has some strawberries, dipping chocolate, mulberries, blueberries, Icecream, Champagne a blanket, a good book of your choice, and a loaf of bread I hope you can find a nice spot near the beautiful crystal clear pond just over there....that has some hungry wild ducks, 🦆geese’s and other birds🐦🐧 and hungry little fishes 🐟🐠 swimming around in the pond...that you can feed the loaf of bread 🥖 to, from the gift basket... Just sit and watch the birds eating and enjoying the bread and the little fishys making tiny waves in the water while they feed from the bread....

    I hope your doing okay Peppy, I heard somewhere that you have been sad lately, Here you go gentle Peppy I have a shoulder for you to cry on, and some very gentle and very soft cloud tissues to dry your eyes...

    I hope you have a nice day and night tonight, thinking of you Peppy and wishing you only the very best...

    Love and warm soul hugs...( I’m learning of you. I believe you’re Deebi’s top apprentice for hugs 🤗)...

    Grandy..

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  2. Peppermintbach
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    3 September 2018 in reply to Ggrand

    Hi lovely people,

    An appreciative thank you for all the support and love...as always...

    Butterfly Wings: your love, hugs and butterfly wishes are always most welcome here :) I find all of it enormously comforting. Thank you so much for checking up on me even when I know you’re struggling a lot yourself...

    Also what a lovely surprise on the pearls thread...thank you for your generosity and thoughtfulness. It was lovely. I particularly liked the part about the wildlife (including the butterflies). Good choice :)

    Much love...”Dusk till dawn” xoxo

    Grandy: hello Angel Wings...what a beautiful and gentle post. Thank you so much :)

    I agree with you that animals can often help us to grow. I love that you said it...

    Yes, you’re right, I also feel animals are very expressive with their love and affection. If they care, you know it and generally don’t have to secondguess their affection for you...there’s something very reassuring in that...

    What an incredible picnic basket filled with goodies. I love it! Hanging out with birds, fish and other animals sounds like a good way to spend the day. I love my present :)

    Yes, I have been feeling down and it’s very thoughtful of you to notice and pop in here to check on me. You have a very compassionate heart and I love that about you...

    Super soul hugs back at you. See, I did learn from the best ;)

    Love and care,

    Peppy xoxo

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  3. startingnew
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    3 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Hello my dear Peps,

    your most welcome, i am glad that you liked them.

    would you like to talk about whats gotten you down? we are all here for you whenever you need, you matter so very much to me and i know others feel the same way.

    Big squishy hugs and many butterfly wishes

    Dusk Till Dawn

    BW xoxoxoxox

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  4. Peppermintbach
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    6 September 2018 in reply to startingnew

    Hi Butterfly Wings (waves to all),

    You’re very caring and kind to ask and offer :) As always, your beautiful heart shines...

    Just have a lot going on lately...I know you’re here for me. That means a lot...thank you so very much...

    Your hugs and butterfly wishes are amongst the best :) I’m eternally grateful for them...

    Much love and squishy hugs...

    ”Dusk till dawn”

    Pepper xoxox

    1 person found this helpful
  5. demonblaster
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    6 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Our dear gentle Pepstar 🤗 hi everyone ☺

    Hi love my names Demon blaster (DB) might be hard to believe but I'm a good friend of yours and love and care very much about you but being in my thoughts as are others here too, listening and not liking hearing you're struggling but not coming in to support you isn't showing much of above Peppy 🤗

    I'm so sorry you struggle with sadness and yet you still manage to be there for people me included. I doubt you'd be fazed hun but I do feel guilty especially that you're by my side so regularly. You are in my thoughts and I do keep an eye on you. I hope to overcome shutting down in the hards though in rl I mostly don't and here there's so much support so I know you loves are in good hands.

    Mmm your prezzy really has me stumped, I have it bit over half way ready but bit of a mind block lovey but rest assured you'll find ut very useful when it comes in the next millenium 😉

    Peps I hope at least some of your sadness is lifting. A lady I know all her life never felt happy until 5 ish yrs ago on different meds she now knows what it's like to feel good. It may not be meds but there's always hope hun, without it there wouldn't be much point.

    Love and yes another super soulllll 🤗 annnd just as an extra for your stock a ... ☘

    🖤❤💟 be safe darlin 🌹

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  6. startingnew
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    6 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Hi Peps

    thank you, you have such a kind caring heart yourself.

    Is there anything you would like to talk about? it might help sort of some thoughts or emotions.. no pressure though

    sending many many hugs and much love

    'dusk till dawn'

    BW xoxoxoxo

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  7. Peppermintbach
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    7 September 2018 in reply to demonblaster

    Hi beautiful people,

    A warm and heartfelt thank you, as always, for the blessings and support :)

    Lovely DB: thank you so much for visiting :) It’s always a treat to see your multicoloured/rainbow smiley face floating around the forums.

    Oh, don’t even worry about it ;) It’s okay...you’re very thoughtful and considerate but it’s alright. Please don’t feel bad or beat yourself up over it...I feel just visit when you can and when you can’t, you can’t...I’m just happy you’re here now.

    Your message of hope is loving and gentle. I really do appreciate it. Very much so...thank you.

    Loving the clover and excited for this big prezzie you’re planning!

    Super soul hugs and much love xoxo

    Magnificent Butterfly Wings: your presence always makes me smile. Thank you...

    I just have a lot going on personally with family and friends. Plus I’ve also been doing some reflecting...I’m rather appalled with myself especially when it comes to my own hypocrisy when it comes to animals (whole other story there).

    Suffice to say that I’m less than impressed with myself. There’s a lot that I need to work on...

    On the plus side, my psych thinks he has had a breakthrough (lol). He commented that he believes that I finally showed some emotion last week in session...it took close to a year...give or take a month or 2...

    Much love

    ”Dusk till dawn”

    Pepper xoxox

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  8. Guest8901
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    7 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Dear Pepper,

    Hey congrats on the breakthrough that your psych believes the pair of you have achieved 👍🎉

    But how do you feel personally about this newfound discovery of an ability to show emotion?

    I used to have my emotions under a tight rein, and well hidden for so many years. But these past 6 months I feel like the floodgates have been opened, never to be closed or controlled again.

    I have mixed feelings on this, so am curious as to your thoughts on it.

    Not sure what you mean about hypocracy around animals? You do not strike me however, as being the hypocritical type. Dont be too hard on yourself. 🍀🌺😀

    I have not been posting for the past 2 weeks, but continue to 👀 and👂my good friends. Im very lucky to consider you to be one of them. Thanks for the wave from Grandys thread this morning too.

    Love and care to you, as always.

    Amanda 💕

    3 people found this helpful
  9. Ggrand
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    7 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Hello Peppy,

    Thank you for all your beautiful and gentle suggestions and care on my thread, you are so very much appreciated by me as are your words....

    Peppy I’m concerned about you, and your sadness, also please don’t be so hard on yourself😢..hurts to hear a friend feel appalled / less impressed with herself...Please dearest Peppy, believe me when I say that I have huge admiration for you, with they way you understand and speak about animals, I can hear the love in your words.... and I also know that you would never intentionally do wrong by any creature on this earth, including people...You have a very gentle soul...

    Peppy it’s late Friday afternoon and I know soon you will have the week end off work and here at BB...It’s time for you now Peppy, Please just take out for you and do whatever you want to do... maybe some window shopping, or some art, maybe some time with your friends....it doesn’t matter what you do Peppy as long as it’s what you want to do......

    Each day is a new day for some special memories to be made....Just want to also remind you that! I think you are very Sensitive, creative , talented, smart,strong, compassionate, brave and perfect just the way the are, because you are Peppy....You are also beautiful and very much loved here by so many.....

    You will get through this. It may not be today or tomorrow, but you will get through this, and like so many others here, I’ll stay by your side and help you along in the right direction....

    I hope you have a good restful weekend dear gentle Peppy...

    Much love and many hugs with some 🕊🕊🕊🕊Peace,,,ohh..wow...Peppy the little dove just dropped..🍀🍀 some 4 leaf clovers...Here you go Peppy. 💼...wait...um...looking...looking....ah...found it...💫 a golden bracelet to place your 4 leaf clovers onto....

    Grandy....

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  10. Birdy77
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    8 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Dear Pepper ❤

    I wanted to say thank you so much for all the beautiful things you have said to warm my heart and boost my spirit.

    You are a special woman and a special friend.

    Stand strong during these times of angst with your family and friends.

    I hope that you feel that you can lay some of your burdens down here with us who love and respect you.

    We are here, listening, if you would like at any time.

    I understand the reluctance, I am the same.

    But i think it's pretty clear that the doors of our hearts are open to you.

    I am not 100% sure, but I think I understand your feelings about hypocrisy and disappointment in self .... if I do understand, I want to say to you: you are one of the very few who challenge the inherent unfairness that is the foundation of the culture into whch we are born, and that takes immense courage.

    I would remind you that you are enacting that beautiful quote from the amazing Maya Angelou : do the best you can until you know better. Then, when you know better, do better.

    You are doing that!

    But I do get it and I sit with you, with compassion and understanding, inside that feeling. I have it too. Especially looking back, and realising the blinkers that were so stubbornly fitted all those years (decades!).

    There are so many conversations we could have ....

    Sorry if I have misunderstood anything here, but hopefully it will make sense and settle on your heart, gently.

    You are a special soul, Pepper.

    We are all so much better off for having you in our lives.

    With my love and admiration,

    🌻birdy

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  11. Peppermintbach
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    8 September 2018 in reply to Guest8901

    Hi lovely people,

    As always, a heartfelt and incredibly grateful thank you for everything. I’m very blessed...

    Caring Mandy: it’s beautiful to see you here :) thank you so much especially when I know you’ve been having such a hard time...

    How I feel about emotions can be summed up as mixed...not entirely sure how I feel about them...so in a sense, I suppose it’s not that different to you ;)

    It sounds like your emotions have been very overwhelming (and draining). Feeling is exhausting...

    You’re very kind and reassuring to say such comforting things to me but I don’t feel this is me being hard on myself but it’s just me reflecting on my own behaviour. That being said, your warmth and caring is very much appreciated :)

    Thank you so very much. I’m sending you gentle cuddles, friendship and general affection. I know it has been really tough for you...xoxo

    Gorgeous Grandy: our favourite little angel :) Your post made me smile. Thank you dearly...

    Your beautiful gifts and love is something that I will hold close to me. The doves, 4 leaf clovers and golden bracelet are all precious to me. Thank you so very much...

    You shine in your compassion and generosity. That well of caring of yours runs deep...I can feel it...I’m loving my weekend well wishes too :)

    Thank you so very much for being by my side. What a wonderful friend you are...xoxo

    Beautiful Birdy: I feel as though I should be thanking you (not the other way around lol). Your words warmed my heart and made me feel very cared for...thank you...and a grateful one at that too...

    Please don’t apologise; I don’t feel you have misunderstood anything. If anything, I feel you’ve grasped what I mean...

    Yes, I know you and other lovely people, are here for me. It really does mean a lot. Thank you...

    Just know we are here for you too. Sometimes I admit that I worry about you but I also understand that you don’t necessarily want to talk at times, which I get too...

    There are things on my mind that have been bothering me but I feel there’s another thread that is more suitable so I’ll go and purge there...

    Love and care to all,

    Pepper xoxox


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  12. startingnew
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    8 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Hello Dear Peps,

    I dont have much to add to what everyone has already said, so ill just sit here and listen if you want to release anything here, if not that is perfectly fine too.

    Hugs and hugs, much love and of course extra butterflies being sent your way

    Dusk Till Dawn

    xoxoxox

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  13. Peppermintbach
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    10 September 2018 in reply to startingnew

    Hi magnificent Butterfly Wings (waves to all),

    Sitting, listening and visiting is perfect. I love having your company here :)

    The hugs, love and butterflies are all happily and gratefully accepted. Thank you, lovely one...

    Speaking of butterflies, I saw 2 butterflies on Saturday when I was having a bit of a rough time. One yellow butterfly (I rarely see those) and an orange one. They always make me feel comforted...mostly because they make me think of you :)

    Love, warmth and gentle big sis hugs from me...

    ”Dusk till dawn”

    Pepper xoxo

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  14. Birdy77
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    13 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Hi beautiful Pepper,

    Just thinking of you heaps.

    Sitting with you in your feelings.

    Feeling with you.

    Caring.

    Understanding.

    Love,

    🌻birdy xoxo

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  15. startingnew
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    13 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Hello Pepper Girl

    oh wow a yellow one! i havent seen one of those before, i hope you get to see some more and some other unusual ones too. i seen a lovely monarch butterfly ((the orange and black ones) sitting on a flower a few days ago, i wish i had my phone ready it wouldve made a nice picture.

    How are you going today?

    Sending lots of love, hugs and many butterfly wishes to you

    Dusk till Dawn

    Love butterfly wings (and many other names youve got going ;) )

    xoxoxoxoxox

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  16. Peppermintbach
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    13 September 2018 in reply to Birdy77

    Hi wonderful people,

    An enormous thank you for the compassion, love and caring :)

    Beautiful Birdy: thank you so much for visiting despite how you’ve been struggling yourself. It really does mean a lot...

    Your post was just perfect. Heartfelt and pure. As always, your deep compassion shines...it’s a very rare quality....that depth of compassion.

    I’m trying to make some major changes/transition over the next 6 months...it’s the least that I can do in my eyes. I feel as though I’m swimming in a pool of my own animal related hypocrisy...and it ain’t pretty...

    I think you help make me a more compassionate person. Not because you persuaded me or pushed anything onto me (you didn’t) but because you, along with others, engaged me in a conversation, and the wheels started turning in my head...

    All I can say is please just keep being you...keep writing your letters to various levels of government, sharing recipes, engaging people in conversation...

    You called me “special” but seriously, I think that applies more to you than me. You’re the special one, not me :)

    Thank you...and a very heartfelt and sincere one at that too. Much love to you...xoxo

    Magnificent Butterfly Wings: what a gift to see my favourite online little sis flutter her wings across these pages :) That is one of my favourite sights...thank you so much...

    The monarch butterfly sounds gorgeous. It’s a pity that you weren’t able to take a photo...next time maybe...

    Yes, I had to do a double take because, at first, I thought maybe it was my eyes....but then I realised, nope, it was definitely yellow :)

    Thank you for caring and asking...it has been a bit of a rough week for me. Emotions are scattered...

    Sending squishy hugs and love to you. “Dusk till dawn” xoxo

    Pepper xoxo

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  17. startingnew
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    15 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    hello my online sis,

    im so glad youve got some lovley butterflies fluttering around. i wish i could see more in my area. i havent seen any other butterflies since the monarch butterfly. maybe as it gets further on into spring theyll come out some more too.

    emotions scattered and a rough week huh. big squishy hugs to you. do you want to talk about whats been happening?

    love and hugs and many butterfly wishes

    Dusk till Dawn

    BW xooxoxoxoxoxox

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  18. Peppermintbach
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    16 September 2018 in reply to startingnew

    Hi magnificent Butterfly Wings (waves to all),

    Butterflies always remind me of you so hold a special meaning in my heart...they can elicit a smile or a brief moment of peace, no matter how much I’m struggling...

    Hopefully you’ll see more butterflies too...

    You are so lovely to ask...I have a lot going on personally with family and friends...

    Plus I am just questioning a lot of things about my path/direction. I have more questions than answers, that’s for sure...still can’t shake that feeling of purposelessness...

    Squishy hugs gratefully accepted and offering some even squishier big sis hugs to you...

    Much love...

    ”dusk till dawn”

    Pepper xoxox

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  19. demonblaster
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    16 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Beautiful Peppystar ☺

    Makes me sad seeing you struggling and you're doing it harder lately I think.

    I read part of your struggles the other day on another thread. A sil feels that way too hun 🤗 you're a caring person and so gentle and kind.

    I know you know but I hope you find some solace in knowing you're so loved cared about and appreciated here.

    Much love darling.

    Prezzies a little closer Peps Truth 😎

    🤝🖤💟👀👂🏻

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  20. Peppermintbach
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    16 September 2018 in reply to demonblaster

    Hi lovely DB,

    Thank you so very much :) Your being here means a lot. Excited for my prezzie...

    Sorry, I’m not sure which thread you mean...do you mean the one about animal cruelty, etc?

    If you’re interested, but there’s no pressure or obligation of course, you’re more than welcome to join in on that thread :)

    Love and super soul hugs,

    Pepper xoxox

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  21. demonblaster
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    16 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    You're very welcome darlin you know I love and care very much about our beautiful gentle caring Peppystar

    Yes that's the one.

    You have a big heart Peps.

    Please try not to doubt yourself, from the bits I know of you, you really do so much for people and animals.

    You're a wonderful loving person. You deserve peace because that's what you give out.

    Shame you can't keep some for yourself

    ☘🤗🤗extra cause you need it

    💗

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  22. startingnew
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    16 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Hi my sweet peps

    Aww sending biggest hugs ever. That sounds like alot to deal with. I hope that both your friendship and family troubles are resolved soon. It sucks when they happen let alone whrn they happen at the same time.

    and then theres those dreaded purposeless feelings. Hmm pity we cant kick thor to the curb huh. If its to do with work and along those lines have you considered talking to like a careers counsellor? They may be able to help you more too esp since you dont have to remain anonymous with them. Just a thought anyway, i have one atm and after 4 sessions shes helped me quite abit. . A life coach may also be another option to look into. These are just thoughts of course and its up to you if youd like to take them on aboard 🙄

    How are you finding your therapy sessions at the moment?

    I havent read the other thread so im not sure if im missing bits and pieces, if you have let me know so your not repeating yourself :)

    For now though sending many hugs, much love butterfly wishes and of course dusk till dawn xoxo ❤♥❤♥❤♥

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  23. Peppermintbach
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    17 September 2018 in reply to demonblaster

    Hi lovely people,

    A grateful thank you, as always :) I believe that no one owes anyone else anything at the end of the day so it makes me feel extra appreciative when people go out of their way to support others...

    Wonderful DB: Thank you so much, that’s very kind and gracious of you to say. But I actually do very little for humans and animals...

    I do perhaps the bare minimum, sometimes even less, which I feel is hardly cause for celebration...

    That being said, your super soul hugs and clovers are lovingly accepted. Thank you so very much :)

    Much love and super soul hugs xoxo

    Magnificent Butterfly Wings: Thank you for the beautiful support. Your presence and thoughts are always appreciated :)

    Sighs, an unstimulated mind can be hazardous...

    My issue is two-fold:

    a) I’m not challenged or stimulated, and for me, it is becoming increasingly problematic. I’m starting to go stir crazy.

    b) I don’t feel a sense of purpose in the way that I live my life or in most things that I do...

    I’m not challenged by the work that I do, I’m not challenged by the offline company that I keep...I’m just not challenged...sighs, I don’t know what is wrong with me...

    For all intents and purposes, I’m relatively busy in my offline realm, but being busy doesn’t automatically mean feeling stimulated...

    The lack of purpose is an ongoing issue...seriously questioning the things that I do with my life.

    It’s this feeling that I’m wasting a lot of my time (essentially wandering around aimlessly) plus I feel as though I’m not really contributing to anything in a meaningful way...

    But then again, I’m not certain that I know what really makes me tick...

    I know, for example, you and DB, are both huge believers in mental health advocacy.

    I know birdy is big on animal rights.

    I know someone else here called Unbeliever has strong views on the environment and the cumulative effect.

    As for me...my answer is “???”

    My interests are scattered and diverse. I care and take an interest in a variety of things but if I were to pick 1-2 to go focus on, which is probably what I need to do... I come up with this

    ???

    Sighs...

    Thanks for listening :)

    Butterfly, I know you’ve had past traumas with animals and i worry that the animal cruelty, etc thread might be a little triggering for you. So I’m not sure if you, my lovely friend and sister, really want to visit the animal cruelty thread. It’s up to you of course but I’m just putting it out there....

    Much love...”Dusk till dawn” xoxo

    Pepper xoxo

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  24. Guest8901
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    17 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Dearest Pepper,

    Firstly, you said 'thanks for listening'. Thats easy actually ... you are very easy to listen to .. thought provoking and speak so much sense. Always measured, always helpful, always encouraging.

    I'm sorry that you continue to struggle with yourself however. I can relate to a lot of what you said in your latest post. I so very much admire the likes of Birdy, Deebi and Unbeliever who each have something they care greatly about and who strive to improve things.

    Unfortunately I am severely lacking in passion, commitment and drive. I dont have anything that I am particularly passionate about in life, nothing that drives me to a lifetime commitment to improve the world. I lack purpose ... simple .. I dont feel I have a purpose in life. Mental illness does that to us though Pepper, its a symptom of our illness.

    I am very interested to hear how you intend to go about adding passion, commitment, drive and purpose into your life. Always listening and caring.

    Amanda

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  25. Peppermintbach
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    17 September 2018 in reply to Guest8901

    Hi lovely and caring Mandy (waves to all),

    What a wonderful Monday morning visit from you. Thank you so much especially when I know how hard you’re doing it. Hugs to you...

    It’s time for my favourite spiel (I can see the eyes rolling lol)... I realise each and every person here is struggling yet makes time for me. That means a lot. Really and truly...thank you Mandy :)

    Like you, I also admire the likes of birdy, UB and DB...

    In particular, UB and birdy helped remind me of the person (child, more specifically) that I used to be...the little girl who was passionate about human rights. I was a very strange child...

    I’m sure she’s still in there somewhere...buried under massive piles of (my own self generated) rubbish, distractions, and general confusion...I just need to find her as I feel she would know what to do..I’ve lost my way somehow...

    Increasingly, my heart is pointing towards a life path centred around animal protection and combatting climate change. There’s probably a reason why I spend so much time on the animal cruelty, etc thread...

    That being said, I’m not 100% sure and may change my mind in a week’s time...

    I have been contemplating the difference between an activist and an advocate as I figure out what I want to do...

    An activist tries to reform a system outside of the system e.g. an animal rights activist might lead peaceful protests or writes letters to ministers.

    Whereas an advocate tries to make changes within a system. For example, an animal rights advocate might work for a company that tests cosmetics on animals with the goal to bring about changes from within...

    I have been contemplating the 2 because I feel both play a role...my questions than answers though...

    I feel that I would be willing to make changes and commit...my issue is I don’t know what I want to commit to...as I said, my interests are diverse...

    As for you, dear Mandy, I feel for you. Lacking purpose is a horrible feeling in my opinion.

    I understand that feeling...it’s like being neither here nor there but being in a weird limbo of sorts. We’re here because we are but we don’t know why...for some people, that’s okay, but for others, it’s painful...

    Hearing you, Mandy

    Love,

    Pepper xoxo

    3 people found this helpful
  26. Guest8901
    blueVoices member
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    1634 posts
    17 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Thank you Pepper. As expected ... a very thorough and insightful answer.

    I too care about many things .... most definitely animals and climate change, that is a biggie for me. And yes, I do read along with that particular thread with great interest. In fact I care a lot, and it upsets me often,m but I never take it any further. I dont feel able to, I feel powerless in every respect. I am just one very small pathetic voice in the far distance, too afraid to speak up most of the time. The feeling of being powerless and unable to change things is very upsetting, and I wish I could be different. But I dont seem to have the strength of purpose. It doesnt mean I dont care, it just means I feel useless and unable to change anything, no matter what I do. Its like bashing your head against a brick wall ... where does that get you?

    Passion - maybe I do have that for some issues. Commitment - severely lacking. Does this mean my passion is not great enough? Purpose - why bother, when I know I cannot make a difference anyway?

    Same as you ... lots of questions, very few answers. I think you have many things to think of. I hope you find that passionate little girl you used to be. She sounds fantastic. There is nothing wrong whatsoever with having diverse interests, other than perhaps in deciding where your greatest passion lies. The diversity keeps you centred and real, while persuing your passions.

    There is no hurry, you have the rest of your life to decide. You will always make a difference though Pepper, simply because of who you are. You cannot help but make a difference to others.

    Amanda xx

    3 people found this helpful
  27. Birdy77
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    2299 posts
    17 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Dear Pepper, love to your fans 😊

    Firstly, I would like to echo Amanda's perfectly articulated observation: you will always make a difference in this world simply because of who you are.

    You make a difference to me.

    You say you don't do much for humans ... what about the dozens, probably hundreds of people you have comforted, encouraged, listened to, saved, on these forums? You make a difference in people's lives every single time you write a post, always full of warmth, empathy, compassion & understanding.

    You will never know what your words have meant to a person at any given moment. Do not discount the power & importance of the difference you make here.

    You say you have more questions than answers ... it shows your deeply insightful spirit to be brave enough to explore a questioning life, a curious life, a caring life.

    I think a life of questioning is a life of growth, & it shows a wise and beautiful humility. It opens you up to the possibilities of creating your own authentic way in this world, not one based on other's answers, opinions & prejudices. It is your way of journeying towards your own truth, just as it should be.

    You say you are looking for that child you used to be, & that she will know what to do. You will find her, because she is you, she's with you right now, in your heart, on your shoulder, cheering you on in your questioning and the ways you are challenging the habits and rules that aren't sitting well with you.

    She is guiding you right now. She's been whispering in your ear, gently pushing you into this period of discomfort and uncertainty, this place of growth for you. Please give that brave, courageous, wise little Pepper a hug from me.

    I understand those feelings of purposeless and understimulation. Very uncomfortable and irritating. Sometimes I feel really overwhelmed by the idea of "finding my passion" or discovering just exactly what it is I want to do with "my life", and it makes me feel a bit hopeless & frustrated & a bit powerless.

    But what about this: you don't have to decide what you want to do with your life Pepper. You can just decide what you want from today, what you can do with passion today, what things you can change today that will express your values, what small acts you can do today that will align with what's in your heart. Be gentle with yourself on the journey. You can't master the rest of your life right now, but you can master this moment. Maybe you can master the afternoon.

    Love from

    🌻birdy

    3 people found this helpful
  28. demonblaster
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    7817 posts
    17 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Dear Peppystar (did ya notice a new name ☺ just perfect for you my lovely.

    First up I feel you're in need of a long loving soul 🤗

    Before I rattle on I'd like to commend you all on excellent communication and such depth & wisdom in responses.

    This isnt about me so only a bit is I can relate to how your feeling about purpose. Rather than chew up your space here Peps I'll talk at mine.

    A few points as our beautiful Mandy and Tweety said I too feel.

    I don't think it's a bad thing that you're checking out different options as opposed to going in one direction (no harm in that either) because you're thinking laterally and looking at options. Because animal cruelty and being a humanitarian is where your heart lays something will gel with you in time. I get confusing and frustrating for you no doubt but while you continue to think and not give up something eventually could surface.

    Agree that our illnesses or MH issues can block and slow the process but not necessarily stop you sweety girl ☺

    If I understood correctly you're a vegetarian? and considering vegan? You don't feel for animals you're doing much or enough. Imo that's huge. The fact you clearly care deeply and hurt for them as you do is beautiful. Maybe in time you'll find a way to sustain your want to actively help them which I honestly feel you do already. Maybe you could join a peaceful animal rights group.

    Humanitarian; 100% also feel that what you contribute here how you support with such a gentle approach, understanding and kindness is helping potentially thousands Peps.

    Always keep in mind hun beasty convinces us we're less than we are, but IT lies. Peps darlin look past beasty at you. A Beautiful person ☘You can't see your goods. You deeply care about animals and help people.

    Annnd cause I'm good like that 😊 and clearly you're in need of a good dose of 🍫 as oh dear how sad your pockets empty (giggles behind hand) I'm sharing one of Grandys with you. Oh oh Mandy and Birdy how thoughtless ..here loves 🍫🍫 🙄🤗😚...🏃‍♀️

    Love Peps and girls 💗


    3 people found this helpful
  29. Peppermintbach
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    4566 posts
    18 September 2018 in reply to Guest8901

    Hi lovely people,

    Marvellous Mandy: I just want to give you a comforting hug...your candid post was both disarming and heartbreaking at the same time.

    You have a loving heart, clearly care and and have passion. Yet you feel powerless and feel as though your voice doesn’t “count.” That must really hurt...I wonder if your C-PTSD plus certain relationship dynamics in your life plays a role in those feelings...

    But here’s the thing. In my opinion, and you may not believe me right now, but of course your voice 100% matters and that you’re more powerful than you realise...

    UB is a proponent of the cumulative effect, which basically means small positive changes by each of us as individuals can add up to an enormous combined change. That’s the cumulative effect...one person can’t possibly do all the work so “teamwork” (so to speak) helps.

    For example, in something as simple as my weekly grocery shop, it’s a chance to use my voice. I could choose to buy cruelty-free products, and if all people started doing the same, companies will stop testing on animals because they will flock to the $. Demand drives supply to a large extent...

    I suppose what I’m trying to say is you are more capable and powerful than you realise. You absolutely do matter...

    More comforting hugs and an enormous thank you for your heartfelt words of encouragement :)

    Beautiful birdy: As always, a deeply compassionate, understanding and insightful response :) Thank you so very much...I’m very moved.

    I loved what you said about how “a life of questioning is a life of growth.” I agree...I absolutely don’t believe in blindly doing/believing anything without challenging and critically assessing it.

    I must admit that I’m a little surprised by your admission that you too struggle with questions about purpose/passion. I suppose, in my mind, I always saw you as this passionate (but gentle) animal rights activist. There’s no pressure but would you like to talk about this more?

    Thank you for your very encouraging words. It means a lot but I must confess that I do struggle to believe that my words here do very much other than offer some (very) small comfort. I have a very conflicted relationship with words...

    A heartfelt thank you for you beautiful encouragement, love and support. I’m truly grateful for your friendship :)

    Dazzling DB: thank you so much to you too...I saw the post on your thread, which relates to your post here. So I hope it’s okay if I respond to you on your thread :)

    Love,

    Pepper xoxo

    3 people found this helpful
  30. Birdy77
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    2299 posts
    18 September 2018 in reply to Peppermintbach

    Dear Pepper,

    Your words to others are always so gentle and understanding. Do not doubt the power of this! To a struggling, suffering person, a gentle word or two of understanding and empathy could save them, remind them they are worth something, give them hope. That's huge, that's not just a small comfort. Your words have power. Believe that.

    I love that you read along on the animal thread, Amanda, and Pepper is absolutely right that your voice is powerful. Every choice we each make on a daily basis is powerful. Pepper's response to you reminded me of a pin I saw on Pinterest the other day: " 'But what difference can I make?' said 7.6 billion people. " But Amanda you are so right when you say mental illness can warp our feelings about our ability to instigate change, it warps our sense of agency and power. Sorry Pepper if I've gone off topic.

    You said i surprised you when i said I understand purposelessness, I understand not knowing exactly what to do with my life. I have always felt a bit like that, and have spent many years of my life questioning what I'm up to, still do to some extent ... yes, I do have this passion for animal rights and justice for animals, and it's something that permeates my every day activities, each meal I cook, each dollar I earn, each shopping choice I make. But it doesn't mean I have myself put together! I am just doing my best in what feels like a crazy world a lot of the time. I feel like I'm still finding my path, and that's ok. It has to be ok.

    I guess I was just encouraging you to not overwhelm yourself, to break it down into segments, into the here and now, and I'm saying I understand. I'm saying I'm here with you, knowing what those feelings feel like.

    It is so courageous of you to be transitioning to a way of life that aligns with your values Pepper. If you ever need any help or support with anything, please ask me ... I am treading that path with you.

    Love,

    🌻birdy

    3 people found this helpful

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