Hi Blink,
From what you have written I am wondering if you have been abused in the past? When you mentioned something about your "NO" not having been listened to, and words to the effect that you only like him to touch you.
If this is the case, then you may well have issues with trust, self esteem, self worth and image.
Like Tony mentioned, trying to catch up with other people, finding a hobby, joining a sports group or even volunteer work might help you not be so dependent on your boyfriend.
Can you look around your area and find something that you might like to become involved in?
What sort of things did you enjoy doing years ago?
Do you have family that live close by?
I hope my words about possible abuse have not hurt or offended you. Abuse can come in many forms, emotional, physical, sexual and mental and even more ways too I guess.
Cheers for now from Mrs. Dools