Whatever estranged situation you endure with your blood child the pain is lifelong.
I have two daughters 32 and 28yo. The older one I'm close to, the younger one I'm estranged. The older one has zero contact with her sister and birth mother and firmly believes they are evil.
It's clearer to me now, that my youngest stayed in the care of her mother and not only willingly adopted my ex's narcissistic ways (silence as a weapon, emotional manipulation, grandiose mannerisms etc) but is the spitting image of her mother. I divorce her mother for those reasons, so what hope did we have?
My youngest would re-enter my life ever 2 years or so, sometimes for money that she wouldnt get, sometimes to hear the gossip, sometimes to enter then leave suddenly. Her preferred form of communication was facebook. With FB she had the ultimate tool as she could block me at will, communicate with my family and friends to find out information then - gone!! in an instant. Two years later "Hi Dad" and the 2 weeks of reaching out with love and care was dashed in being blocked again.
I made the toughest of all decisions. I severed all ties. Yep, I blocked her and it remains that way, purely for my mental well being that my other daughter and wife deserve, they deserve me with my mental health the best it can possibly be. Subjected to trauma, then grief, then happiness ofr a few weeks then trauma and the cycle continues, is not good.
The internal feeling of stigma for "abandoning my daughter is very real plus that feeling of failure. You can give your child opportunity, you can give them love and support but if they are destructive for whatever reason and no action works you might need to consider limits. Such boundaries if you fortress of survival. It's ok to keep grieving but sometimes its just not your fault.