Sounds like an incredible challenge, without a doubt, and my heart goes out to you.
Do you find the deeper the challenge in life, the more potentially depressing it is? Like it's no great challenge to get the dirty dishes washed but as soon as a life long challenge renters the frame, BAMM, it becomes a serious trigger for a lot of emotion. You've obviously faced the challenge of 'managing your mum' for most of your life. Putting aside the mental programs of 'Mother/child relationship' and 'Loyalty, no matter what', how would you like to manage this person (your mum) while she's staying with you? Would you like to say 'My phone conversations are not open for discussion' or 'I'm happy to hear you vent your stress but only if you're looking for a solution'?
Being a sensitive person Junah, other people around you have a duty of care when it comes to such sensitivity. They should care not to bring you down, they should care to raise you to moments of happiness and peace, they should care in a way that allows you to vent toward finding solutions. The list goes on.
How would it feel if your mum was to say 'I'm feeling vulnerable and stressed and really appreciate the great care that's been given to me regarding support'. Sounds reasonable, don't you think? Do you think it's also reasonable to say to her 'You need to be more sensitive toward me and the challenges I'm facing at the moment. I can only be around thoughtful sensitive people at the moment, so you gotta get with the program or look forward to expecting less interaction from me while you're here'?
I imagine this is not what you want to hear but you're going to have to expect resistance/conflict. This is what we get when we go from enabler mode into healthy self-esteem mode. I'm facing this transition with my husband at the moment, so I know it's far from easy. I've spent years being somewhat of an enabler and now, having transitioned into a healthy level of self-esteem, I'm regarded as 'difficult and argumentative'. I'm lucky to have my teenage kids reassuring me I'm a loving, sensitive and reasonable person. They don't allow me to doubt myself for a second.
Regarding your husband, consider an agreement for when you share the room (giving you some time to yourself). Conditions of entry: Massages, bedtime stories (so relaxing to have someone read to us), get him to brush your hair (again, relaxing) and so on. Have someone serve you, giving you simple things to look forward to.