I don't think anyone could blame you for being anxious about the vax. People are incredibly frustrated at vaccine hesitancy but that's directed at the classist, racist, ableist side of the anti-vax groups (I myself am in iso because of casual contact, so yep, not a big fan of anti-vax right now). There are many bad reasons to be vaccine hesitant and many good reasons, and I believe you have one of the good reasons.
When I got my first dose, I felt almost like I had a flu - but I've been told this was nothing compared to how CV feels. After the second dose, I had barely any reaction and I felt great, mostly because I knew that people I love, and who are vulnerable, were going to be safer.
Some advice I've been given, is when you feel enormous anxiety, try to listen more to the signals your body is sending you and less to the thoughts. There have been a lot of studies on the physiological feedback of emotions, and it's important to feel your anxiety as it physically exists in your body. Though this may seem a bit counterintuitive, your emotions exist for a reason, and being aware of them and how they're affecting you can help keep you grounded and help you monitor your symptoms. If you focus on your thoughts over your feelings, this can lead to rumination and catastrophising.
Also having a close family member or friend beside you can be more beneficial than anything. Hopefully someone empathetic and non-judgemental who can absorb some of your stress.
Good luck, I know this is a scary time but you seem like a smart and strong person, in the future it'll just be a bad memory!