Let me give a short clarification ;
I have always been what most would call a ‘solitary loner.’
Sure - I’ve had friends! Although I have never HAD A BEST FRIEND REALLY. Although many were not exactly my age. More of the older demographic, if you will.
I just feel incredibly lonely and like such a misfit. I feel like a sore toe that is sticking out, quite hideously and badly.
When I finally find someone who I genuinely think could make a great ‘best friend’ I then shortly find out that they already have someone that they call - a best friend. I have never been someone’s best friend. And it really stinks! I suppose, I don’t really like the term ‘best friend’ anyway...come to think of it!
I feel so out of place. So disorientated. And even more so utterly devastated and confused.
Recently, I was diagnosed with high functioning autism by my psychologist. I proud of myself for getting a proper diagnosis. And above all of that it was a bit of a relief for me. Finally I could identify the problem.. not that autism is a problem as such. I just finally knew that my brain was not wired like a non-autistic person’s. So I think a lot differently to most people.
I just feel trapped and heavily misunderstood. I feel like I am just there in the corner and people don’t want to understand me because I am a little eccentric (personality and appearance wise)
I feel misunderstood, overlooked and quite honestly a little invisible!
Signed a sad,