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Forums / Anxiety / What am I supposed to do?

Topic: What am I supposed to do?

3 posts, 0 answered
  1. alayl
    alayl avatar
    1 posts
    10 October 2021

    I'm 23 and I haven't worked a day in my life. I have a lot of anxiety regarding job search and can never convince myself to actually apply for jobs even though its required through centrelink, and even if I did I am no way ready for a job interview. I don't feel capable and I don't feel good enough. Recently my job providers have decided i'm too difficult to work with and are less inclined to help me, which is how it went with my previous provider as well. So I feel stuck, have been for years.

    I've done some voluntary work, which was basically putting me on register and call anybody else to deal with the problems I faced. I don't feel like it taught me anything about how to work independently. I have no desire to work in any specific industry, I have no passion or anything. I spoke to my gp who decided I was neither anxious nor depressed despite being formally diagnosed with social anxiety. I have spoken to psychologists previously, several actually, I told them what I wanted out of my sessions and I ended up having anxiety explained to me, like i haven't seen several psychologists before who'd given me the same explanation. I know how it works and why it does what it does but that doesn't change that i'm still very much anxious.

    I don't have skills or anything desirable. I bailed out of TAFE because my anxiety and I suck at studying in general. I have absolutely nothing to offer. I don't even have a personality yet I still need to find work.

  2. tranzcrybe
    Valued Contributor
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    tranzcrybe avatar
    619 posts
    10 October 2021 in reply to alayl
    When I was in primary school, there was an excursion to an ice skating rink. Having lived a fairly sheltered life, I had never skated before.
    "No problems", says the teacher, "just walk around the rails until you get the hang of it" and off they go to enjoy themselves.
    Fear of falling or just looking silly (ironically), I clung to the side in desperation with each precarious step. I would love to tell you that by some miracle I sailed off and pirouetted my way to success, but this was not the case as I spent the whole session on the sidelines.
    In some ways, this reminds me of your current predicament...

    Without the support or encouragement, what else could I do? - someone needed to give me a shove or hold my hand in the first instance, but that support just wasn't there.
    You need someone to believe in you also, whatever job you apply for. Oddly enough, one of your skills is your anxiety as you will be finely tuned to the responses of others; another is your age and capacity to engage in work without bias or expectations.
    The thought just popped into my head that you might be good with children, having sensitivity to their needs. If too confronting, how about working with animals - same attributes but with less shouting (:)).
    While most things require some qualification, studying while working in the field is far more manageable as one justifies the other.
    Finding something you believe in is a good way to step over your anxiety - it doesn't go away, but just takes on a lesser priority.
  3. Petal22
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Petal22 avatar
    1363 posts
    11 October 2021 in reply to alayl

    Hi alylayls,

    Wellcome to our forums!

    Im sorry you are feeling this way, it’s ok to not know what you want to do in life right now….. you have plenty of time to figure that out.

    Be kind to yourself, I understand anxiety can be difficult….. if you are finding it hard to manage your anxiety please go and see a different gp and explain how it’s affecting your life…….

    What goals in life do you have? What interests you?

    Yoy say your not ready for a job interview…… do you know what I have found as a great strategy…… you apply for a job you get a job interview….. I tell myself I’m going to be great at that job and I’ll breeze through my interview I can’t wait for my interview! I deliberately get myself super excited about the opportunity……. Positive energy is great!
    Not all interviews are hard….. some are just the people wanting to meet you…

    Night fill jobs are great, very low stress and the crew you work with are all really relaxed and the interview isn’t hard…….. would you apply for something like that?

    Things will get better, just put yourself out there and see we’re it takes you 😊

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