I have been asking myself the same question recently. When you have been in the system for as long as we have, it's hard to see any hope.
For me the pattern seems to go like this:
* I feel very down and have a relapse
* I see a GP who refers me to a psychiatrist
* I see a psychiatrist who doesn't seem to care too much. Blames the relapse on the tablets and decides to change my dose.
* I go through hell adapting to the new tablets and go back to see the psychiatrist for a follow up
* I am told to "up my dose" and that will fix me. Patted on the head and sent my merry way.
* Feel the same and go back to my scheduled fortnightly appointment
* Am told again that it must be the dosage, told to take more, sent away
* Give up ... ride the wave for months, weeks, years whatever. It passes for a while if I am lucky
* I relapse again and in the depths of despair I go back to my GP and the entire cycle continues.
This has been my life for the past 10 or so years. Yes, there has been psychology sessions thrown in there but I don't feel any of the CBT sessions have helped me. Changing thought patterns and meditating may work for some, but not for me.
You watch ads on TV that say "it gets better" and you don't believe it anymore ...
Which brings me to Facetious's post with the quotes, and funnily enough when my Mum encouraged me to make an appointment with my GP today, I thought of that quote, and wish I had of remembered how it went:
Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again but expecting different results." -Rita Mae Brown, Narcotics Anonymous
It does seem insane to me to go through the system again when it has failed time and time again.
Which makes me think ... what is it I am missing here? What am I overlooking? How can I tackle this differently? I don't know. But I am guessing you are in exactly the same boat.