its my first time doing anything like this.
I moved to Australia 2008.
I had been home sick but not to bad.
I have always been terrified of death but it’s never really thought about it.
until my daughter was almost 6 months old in 2015 it hit me bad.
I would wake up 4 5 times a night crying panic attacks.
cried myself to sleep and just felt really down and full of anxiety of loosing my daughter or her loosing me.
I coped with it pretty well for almost 6 years.
then this year my mum went into hospital had lots of good news bad news.
so I had to go the doctors because I knew I wouldn’t cope.
my mum never left hospital she died in august in the uk.
so i couldn’t see her and hadn’t seen her since 2019.
now I feel more depressed than ever feel alone even tho I have 2 kids and a husband.
and really homesick.