hello Sally and Moon I will also reply to your comment, but when you first want to stop your drinking, you have full intentions that you will, but then there comes two problems and these are so powerful to try and forget about, one is the starting time when you usually start, maybe instead of drinking at 1 pm you sneak in a quick one at 12.30 just to get you through until 1, nobody will notice will they, and the other problem is as soon as something goes wrong, you say 'b*****r it' I need a drink straight away, then how much strength do these have, more than taking a shower, changing your clothes, getting a hair cut or even eating, none of these matter as long as I can have a drink.
Hide the time, have a boxing bag in the garage, fill the frig with bottles of fizzy soft drinks, scull a couple of glasses of tonic water, or maybe an orange drink and make sure your belly feels as though it's full, and once you look at the time of day it's 2 hours pasted your drinking time so you can then get through the night.
and Moon, this is a never ending feeling that maybe with you for a long time, and although I can drink socially if I am asked if I want to have a drink at 11 am I say NO, because if I do then the next few hours would have been lost.
If you feel as though you are at breaking point and need a drink, contact your sponsor from AA, someone who has been assigned to help you through these times, remember these sponsors have been through exactly what you are now struggling with, not once, not twice but many times over their time in giving up, they know exactly how you are feeling and even some will come around to visit you, that's what happens in the country.
The thought that a drink will cure how you feel is something we have learnt, but we haven't learnt that after a dozen drinks the problem is still there.
Good for both of you to come and tell us. Geoff.