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Forums / Long term support over the journey / DEPRESSION: Fight it or embrace it?

Topic: DEPRESSION: Fight it or embrace it?

  1. Doolhof
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    Doolhof avatar
    8823 posts
    13 April 2019 in reply to demonblaster

    Hi dear DB and All Reading,

    I'm home again and Mum is still in hospital, she hopes to be able to return home tomorrow. A sibling of mine is going to assist Mum tomorrow.

    Mum told me she didn't need to see me today so I have telephoned her a couple of times to make sure she is okay. Her overnight stay turned into a 4 night stay due to complications.

    I've been doing a lot of praying and worked really hard to make the most of what ever happened. I'm trying to recall all of the lovely moments and to let go of the stuff that was not so pleasant.

    Each day I managed a walk on the beach, sometimes by myself which gave me a chance to just chill out.

    On one occasion I was taking a photo of some shells I placed all in a line on the beach. When I turned around, I had about a dozen seagulls watching me, probably hoping I had food and not just shells!

    DB thanks for your instructions and message, I had already left before I saw what you had written.

    This last week has helped me regain confidence in myself and my ability to deal with issues. I didn't always do well, and that is okay too!

    Now to start making the most of each day in what ever way I can to help build up my resilience once again! To keep reminding myself that people can say what they like, I don't have to take their words or actions to heart!

    I have also started to read a Christian book about hope and growth. It seemed that when ever I picked it up to read it, the bits of instruction I needed were right there in words to help me along!

    Hope you are doing okay DB and same to all who are reading.

    Oh yer, I came home to a sink full of dirty dishes! I told myself I can be thankful I have a husband, thankful we have water for dishes and thankful I have the ability to wash them!

    Cheers all from Dools

    1 person found this helpful
  2. demonblaster
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    13 April 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    Hey Doolsy good to see you was wondering how you were going. That went quickly.

    Wow you really are sounding quite a bit stronger I'm so glad hearing how you're sounding like you have a new lease on it all. You're a strong lady for sure.

    So nice you had plenty of beach time, I know you're at peace there 😆 love the seagulls lining up and how neat lining the shells up. Creative outlet there Doolsy. Keep those nice memories close hand hun.

    Wow how fantastic the Christian book on hope and growth everytime was what you needed.

    Haha loven your thinking meeting a sink full of dishes, good on ya Doolsy.

    So pleased you really do sound like you're on your way back up. That's the way Doolsy 🤗

    Go easy on yourself hun 🎀

    Hope your Mum recovers well.

    2 people found this helpful
  3. Ggrand
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    13 April 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    Hello Mrs Dools..,

    Welcome back hun..I’m pleased to hear that your mum is doing okay..that’s really good news, you done an amazing job being their for her, that’s the caring, kind, beautiful person you are...

    Good girl, trying to recall all the lovely moments you had...any thing other then lovely moments are not worth the space in our minds....Choof them off hun..I know you can do that...

    How lovely collecting shells...I remember I collected shells 🐚 small shells mainly, a few bigger ones and I glued them onto a little cardboard box, and made a pretty shell trinket/jewerlly box..

    Sounds peaceful your walks along the beach, I like the idea of mindfully placing the shells in a row for a photo...and smiled as I remember the sea gulls constantly on look out for food...and pictured them swooping down picking a shell up from up your neat row, only to drop it further down with disappointment because it’s not food....😁..Or maybe they were after their 🎥 picture taken..😁😂..

    I feel sometimes that a change of scenery helps to kick start our resilience and we start to get stronger again...

    Mrs Dools...maybe you were meant to read the book...I believe that something are meant to be..especially if it’s helping you when you need it....

    Very proud of you dear lady..finding some positives in a sink full of dirty dishes...You truely are an inspiration precious dear lady.....

    Sending you much love and some hugs 💜🤗..I hope you have a wonderfully deep relaxing sleep tonight tonight with dreams of fairies, flowers and all things sweet and nice....

    Grandy.....

    3 people found this helpful
  4. Doolhof
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    Doolhof avatar
    8823 posts
    14 April 2019 in reply to Ggrand

    Dear DB and Grandy,

    Thanks ladies, I greatly appreciate the Welcome Back. I sent Mum a message this morning before she left the hospital. Hopefully she will not have anymore complications after her surgery.

    The book I took along was "found" by one of the ladies at the Op Shop. She suggested I might like to read it so I bought it and took it with me. I am going to keep on reading it and will make notes from it.

    I plan to write out or print off some of the wonderful suggestions, ideas and words of hope contained in the book and add them to the little box I already have with positive words and sayings in it.

    While I was away, I took some photos on my mobile phone so will see how I go about getting them printed off and will add some to my journal and write down all the positives in there as well.

    Today I might do some watering and potter about in the garden. Like a lot of places, we have not had rain for so long it is getting so dry with a lot of the garden dying!

    I hope to read more of that book as well.

    Yesterday I cleaned and refilled the bird baths, it was lovely to see a variety of birds enjoying the bird bath out from the kitchen window.

    I'm trying to keep the negative thoughts in check! Or to acknowledge them and let them go again. I like the idea Grandy of "Choofing" them off!

    Tomorrow I have an appointment in a larger town that has a Coles and Woolworths so I will see if either store has Gluten Free Hot Cross Buns for sale. We have a service at Church on Good Friday and we always have hot cross buns after. I will take my own along hopefully.

    Thanks again ladies, a bit of encouragement goes a long way!

    Cheers from Mrs Doolsy

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  5. Guest_1055
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    14 April 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    Hi Mrs D, Grandy and DB,

    You do sound more hopeful or perhaps peaceful Mrs D.

    Way good.

    1 person found this helpful
  6. quirkywords
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    quirkywords avatar
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    14 April 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    Mrs D and everyone reading,

    you have had a busy week and have made plans. I will be impressed when you download photographs from your mobile. I would be clueless.

    you seem positive.

    I suppose I accept I will have negative thoughts and self doubt but I can try to ignore them.

    Let me know how choofing negative thoughts goes.

    Quirky

    1 person found this helpful
  7. demonblaster
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    14 April 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    Hey Doolsy hey everyone ☺

    Wow so good hearing that chirp you have dear lady you really do sound so much more positive and got plenty of plans. Good on you hun.

    Nice seeing the birdies in the bird bath and being outsides always refreshing I find.

    You're a strong courageous lady you inspire so many I'm sure. Love how you're bouncing back you're amazing.

    Leaving you and anyone wanting a good soul warming hug.

    🤗

    🌱

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  8. demonblaster
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    14 April 2019 in reply to Guest_1055

    Hey Shells and Quirky and of course my/our beautiful Grandy.

    Sorry just posted and forgot to say hi ☺

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  9. Doolhof
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    Doolhof avatar
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    15 April 2019 in reply to demonblaster

    Dear Shell, Quirky, DB, Grandy and All reading,

    Last night I had to do a bit of "choofing" of those negative thoughts when I felt like my dear husband was treating me like the hired help and not his wife. I'm still "choofing" those thoughts and similar this morning.

    I'm off for a walk shortly, that will help in some ways.

    I need to find ways to make things work differently here at home. It is horrible not feeling comfortable in your own place and like a second class citizen.

    Okay! Time to deal with the negatives, look for the nice things that are around me and get on with my day.

    This morning I have my last appointment with the Narrative Therapist. While in that town I am going to try to get my photos off the phone. Hopefully the staff will be able to show me what I need to do!

    Right now I am telling myself I could turn this into a good day or I could stew over what happened last night and turn it into a not so pleasant day! A good day seems like the wiser choice! Now to make it happen!

    Hi Shelley I'm starting to re-find a sense of hope and peace, so that is something I want to continue to work on.

    DB thanks for the hug, much appreciated!

    Quirky those negatives thoughts do keep happening don't they! All depends what we do with them as to how our day turns out. Hopefully I will not get tot he point of suffocation again. Need to deal with stuff long before that happens.

    I hope you are all able to work out what some of your triggers are and you can find ways to move on and choof those negative thoughts right out of your mind.

    Cheers all from Dools

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  10. Doolhof
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    Doolhof avatar
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    15 April 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    I need to go BLAH and release some frustration.

    I arrived in plenty of time for my teleconference Narrative Therapy session and checked in.

    The clock rolled past my session start time.

    A staff member came out to say the lady I had expected to help me was not in today. Another lady would be with me shortly.

    Eventually she arrived 15 minutes after the scheduled teleconference start time. We arrived in the room and she did not know how to connect to the connection.

    Connected eventually and had a 1/2 hour session instead of a 1 hour session.

    The staff member had left the room and told me to see myself out of the building when I had finished.

    Yes, the session did sort of happen, but I'm so tired of being screwed around and not receiving proper services.

    Right now I am back to thinking "what is the point in trying !"

    Where to from here? Certainly not back to that service.

    How hard would it have been for someone to text or phone me to let me know of the changes before I arrived! That would have made a huge difference.

    Instead I feel frustrated and annoyed.

    At least I used up some of that angry energy vacuuming and mopping the floors.

    Part of me thinks why bother to try to get better?

    Ah, this sucks.

    3 people found this helpful
  11. Ggrand
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    16 April 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    Good Morning Dear Mrs Dools...

    Im Just popping in to wish you a very beautiful and glorious new day...Its your day sweet lady to do with it what you want to.... Choof your depression away..it left you last night with the sunset...You now have another 24 hours to make some wonderful memories for tomorrow..

    The man across the road brought 15 Black Angus cows in around a month ago...Gee I missed them so much...I love sitting outside with my Morning cuppa and just sit their and watch them....There are a couple of younger ones that run around an kick up their back legs...enjoying life..

    As soon as I wake up..my dogs greet me like it’s the first time they have ever seen me...When I get up, They bark and go running into the loungroom and come speeding in..haha I think it’s a race, then jump up onto my bed and both of them just sit their staring at me..tails going a wagging so fast they are like fans...

    Today I go to work in a charity shop..I’m doing something worthwhile, I’m helping other people...You work in a charity shop and also now in an aged care..Those elderly people look forward to your company when you go their....You talk to them, help them, you give them your care and you give them a part of you, you give them some joy each time your their....You make them feel like they are someone special..That’s extremely very worthwhile, you are very worthwhile...

    I am sorry about yesterday..I really am....Rude and inconsiderate people are very hard for us to get over..we automatically think it’s done on purpose but it’s not...Its them not you sweet lady...Try very hard to not bring yesterday into your new day today...yesterday and what happened has gone now... Please lovely precious lady..enjoy today...water those flowers, feed the sheep if they are still there..feed the little birds, hear them..watch the clouds floating across the sky..feel the warm sun on you..sit outside and relax looking and listening to nature....

    I really hope you have a nice day today Mrs Dools..

    Seniding you much love Mrs Dools and many many caring warm hugs 🤗🤗💜💜..

    You are a very special lady who helps a lot of people here, at the nursing home, and charity shop..just a few reasons why you are needed so much in this universe, Mrs Dools..You are very much loved and cared for here..You are very special to so many. So many reasons to “bother” toget well dear Mrs Dools...

    Grandy...

    3 people found this helpful
  12. Doolhof
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    Doolhof avatar
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    16 April 2019 in reply to Ggrand

    Dear Grandy,

    Thank you so much for reminding me once again to choof off those negative thoughts and to be aware of all the blessings I have in my life.

    his morning I did water some of the garden, filled the bird baths again and watched the birds through the kitchen window.

    Yesterday I was able to print photos off my phone and printed some doubles so I could send some photos to my parents of a couple of places we had visited together the week before. I wrote them a brief letter to go with the phots.

    Today I was assisting in the home for the elderly. In the afternoon I was able to encourage a lady to join the craft group, I did not realise until after that she had never attended before. While she was there, all her cares and worries were forgotten.

    I hope to be able to encourage her to join in again next week while I am there. Just like all of us, the dear lady just needed someone to listen, to be creative and have something nice to do for a while.

    After that I had a massage booked in and kind of enjoyed it despite all the pain it caused! Hopefully a few knots have been massaged out now.

    Came home and intended to lay down for half an hour and actually fell asleep for a couple of hours.

    Thanks for the story about the cattle Grandy and the dogs. We have not had the sheep here for many months as everything here is just dirt. Even the weeds have given up growing as it is so dry.

    Last night I went to bed and read a bit more of the Christian book I mentioned previously and once again, up popped the words I needed to read about not giving up and accepting mistakes happen and people are just people.

    It also mentioned how or expectations are not always met and we have to find ways to accept that and deal with our disappointments! Talk about words hitting me flat in the face!

    So tomorrow is a new day! I can try again. If something knocks me down I need to get back up again.

    Thanks dear Grandy for listening and for being a great friend and support as so many people are here!

    Cheers all from Dools

    2 people found this helpful
  13. demonblaster
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    22 April 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    Dear Doolsy and hi everyone ☺

    I never tire listening to you, you so often find reasons to be happy and see things in a nice way that makes me feel good listening to you.

    How are you doing Doolsy 🤗 I'm sorry I didn't get back till now but know you're one of several here that I care very deeply about and you're in my thoughts.

    Loven how when your reading your book it's connecting with you at those times. Fantastic I imagine it'd be quite uplifting.

    How lovely you encouraged the lady to do craft, with luck now shes had a taste it'll be addictive. Awesome you're back with the beautiful elderly.

    Great you can see your birdies from the kitchen window it is very entertaining watching them bath and flutter in the water they're lovely creatures and most have the most amazing voices. I feel at peace hearing birdies sing there's such a happy upbeat melody. There's a cheerful life energy to their sounds I find and so varied.

    How's your physical health going darl.

    Oh that's great you got your photos copied. Bet you were pleased about that and maybe learnt something new.

    I know the pain you mean with massage I at times do my neck when I have bad headaches, it's like cement but kinda feels like it must be helping or at least I hope so anyway 😄

    Ok darl hope you have some nice times today to pop into your memory bank or hat and have plenty of light.

    Have a lovely day everyone ☺⚘

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  14. Doolhof
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    22 April 2019 in reply to demonblaster

    Hi DB and Everyone Reading,

    Thanks for dropping by DB. I've had a few moments the last few days that have not been all that nice, so I have tried to work out what I can do about them.

    Various strategies have worked from taking a nap, reading a book, going for a walk, watering the garden, digging up dead plants from the garden, watching the birds and also thinking about those negative thoughts and working out where they came from and how to stop them from growing.

    I'd planned to achieve a lot of jobs this weekend, but my body decided it was going to be tired and achy instead so that is oaky. There is always tomorrow to start those jobs early in the morning before I return to the home for the elderly for another day.

    I'm going to see if that same lady would like to join in the craft or some activity. I'm not sure if she will actually remember having been to craft last week, that is okay I can ask her again regardless.

    My husband had some errands to do in the city today and asked me to join him. At first part of my negative mind told me it would be a waste of time going. I talked back to myself telling my mind not to be so negative and waste the opportunity to go for a drive.

    My husband was catching up with friends for an hour so he dropped me at the beach. I enjoyed a lovely walk and watched the waves for a while. I would have missed that, the lunch he bought me and a few chats as well as all the scenery and various things to see.

    Our minds can take us on quite a journey at times!

    Cheers to you DB, hope you are doing okay. From Doolsy.

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  15. demonblaster
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    23 April 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    Hey Doolsy and readers ☺

    Good on you it sounds like you're handling your emotions which isn't easy but it gets easier with time and knowing what works for us.

    Even if the lady doesnt remember she still had that stimulation and variation in her daily routine which is great. Good on you.

    Wow that was a boom going against what your negative mind wanted and it seemed to open up a lot of goods for you.

    You love your beach times a good positive memory filler could be remembering what it is you like, the visual, sounds people chats fresh air how it felt. While your minds there it's giving you associated good feelings.

    Hope it's all improving for you Doolsy and that you're gettking good sleep too

    I so often think and enjoy your upside down parrot 😆 the one I saw was a way away.

    Have lovely days hun ☺⚘

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  16. Doolhof
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    23 April 2019 in reply to demonblaster

    Hi DB and All,

    This morning I managed some washing and a little house work before I had to leave for the volunteer role in the home for the elderly.

    The dear lady whom I will call Betty did not seem to recognise me at the home, but was thankfully happy enough to join me when I offered to take her to a group. While she is occupied she doesn't have time to think about all her issues.

    That is so very true for us as well isn't it!

    I have realised that over the weekend I was become a little stressed and upset because I had no routine to stick to. Generally if I have worked out in my mind how the day might go I deal with it a lot better. I am still open to changes that occur.

    Tomorrow I plan to do a bit more housework. We have had several dust storms in our region, the dirt and dust has managed to seep into the house. The windows are brown even though I washed them recently. Goodness knows how much dirt is up on the roof and in the gutters!

    I'm also planning to do some kind of craft and work on my happiness journal, recording all the lovely events from the weekend.

    This morning I reminded myself I did not need to entertain those negative thoughts and tried to choof them off!

    Cheers all from Dools

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  17. demonblaster
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    24 April 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    Hey Doolsy 😊 and all 👋

    How beautiful for Betty, she bets to do something new and stimulating and has a nice lady visiting her regularly. Gold Doolsy. Yes distractions a powerful tool. Creating is exciting and stimulating too. Good you got her back to it.

    Those dust storms sound like a nightmare. Wouldn't be good at all breathing that in I imagine. Saw on the news that rarely I watch just the other day a massive long cloud like dust storm can't remember where and it was like a tsunami. Wow freaky. What a mess to clean after.

    Well done being aware of your stress that may sound silly but it sometimes can take a while before we realise we're tense and out of sorts sounds like you were being mindful and working out why you were out is really good. Hope you're feeling brighter today

    Sounds good doing some craft and your happiness journal. I'm finding lately I'm accessing happies easier and more often which is good.

    Thatta girl keep choofing the negatives off. They can't hurt us while we're focusing on good thoughts and memories.

    Look after yourself dear Doolsy ☺🤗🌱 new beginnings

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  18. Doolhof
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    Doolhof avatar
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    25 April 2019 in reply to demonblaster

    Hi DB,

    Thanks for checking in. Hope you are doing okay.

    Yesterday didn't quite go to plan. For some reason I felt really deflated and exhausted so instead of going to see some craft exhibitions and displays like I had planned I sat on the couch and read a book for hours.

    While my husband watched the footy last night I coloured in a couple of pictures for my happiness journal. I hope to glue them in my book this afternoon and might manage to get out to those exhibitions before they close.

    Yesterday I also cancelled a bus trip I was supposed to helping to organise. Maybe in a couple of days I can talk to the people involved and try again!

    Depression can be so insidious. It can sneak up and start to engulf us before we even realise what is happening.

    Okay! So today is another day! I will try again!

    I have some emails to respond to then I will head out into the garden. We have a clear blue sky and no breeze, so that means NO DUST! Lovely. Rain would be very good though!

    Good on you for finding more Happiness and Good things to think about DB. This morning I awoke with negative thoughts starting to stir so I told them to choof off!

    Hope you have a good Day DB and same to all reading.

    Cheers from Doolsy

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  19. demonblaster
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    25 April 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    Hey Doolsy and all ☺🤗

    I think you probs did right by yourself hun not pushing yourself too hard and reading you did for hrs good on you it must have been good. Mum was an avid reader and said if you have a good book you have a best friend a lot of truth in that.

    Yes true about depression it's like a heavy wave isn't it. Something for those times that might simplify getting on track for positives is pick 3 things you enjoy and get pleasure out of.

    1. Being on the beach
    2. Watching birdies in their bath
    3. Flowers

    These are ideas you might prefer others. So each one if you think about it...

    • Flowers. Colours- see the colours. Look at their shape. Feel what you like about them. Look in your mind at different ones esp faves
    • Beach. See the sand, gulls waves and hear the waves. Feel the fresh air and enjoy the freedom of space. Soft sand at your feet. Imagine being in the water free of all pain.
    • Birdies. Cute. Having their little clean and splash. Refreshing. Their beautiful happy up beat sound. Lively. Feel the lift you have seeing them hun

    So the more you reiterate and take your mind to places you enjoy endorphines would be released I'd think cause that's our happies.

    Clears our mind and encourages us to open it with lateral thinking opposite to depression that closes it.

    Colour is an amazing stimulant in our lives too. Something when you think about things you might like to take your mind to colour for a lift.

    I love your connection with Betty and think often of that Doolsy it gives me a lift knowing how you're helping a lady.

    Darls you're doing well choofing beasty. Keep in mind hun it's only as strong as we allow it to be. If we don't feed it with following painful thoughts it can't hurt us. We don't have to believe IT's negatives.

    I and many people also think you're an incredible person Doolsy and SO much stronger than I think you'd believe of yourself. I love how you tackle this. You have a beautiful positivity streak through you. Survival at it's best.

    An absolute pleasure knowing you dear lady 🤗🕊

    🌱 happy thoughts happy days ⚘

    4 people found this helpful
  20. Ggrand
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    25 April 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    Hello Dear Mrs Dools..

    Its okay that you didn’t stick to your plans...Awe..you were being very gentle and kind to yourself by not going to see the craft displays......You choofed beasty away for those few hours that you read your book...

    Your happiness journal sounds helpful....great distraction when bored or beasty is knocking on your door....keep choofing it off dear mrs Dools ....your doing a really good job...

    Its unbelievable how quick we can go down..in a split second sometimes....I’m wondering if anything around your home, yard, or area is triggering these sudden downs?..Just my thoughts...

    So happy for your dust free day..I don’t get many days without the breeze blowing up dust from across the road....I hope you get many more dust free days....We certainly need rain badly here...and where you are by the sounds of it....it’s so dry out here..that the grass is turning to dust then disappearing...leaving more dry dusty dirt ...I hope some rain will find your place soon..

    Our beautiful Deebi has written some very helpful, beautiful and caring posts..I really cannot add to her words of care...but wanted to drop in and see how you were feeling and say hello....

    You do have a lot of inner strength. dear Mrs Dools.. please try hard to believe in you...

    Love and hugs Dear Mrs Dools, Deebi, and all reading...💜💜🤗🤗....Oh also I found this in my bag 💼 and thought you might like to light some scented 🌹🕯for when you next read your book 📖... 💐 ..

    Grandy..

    3 people found this helpful
  21. Doolhof
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    8823 posts
    27 April 2019 in reply to Ggrand

    Hi Deebi, Grandy and all Reading,

    hanks again for your lovely, encouraging and insightful messages. Love the wisdom you are sharing with me and others ladies.

    Despite the neighbours using some loud, obnoxious, reverberating sounding machinery and my husband having the T.V. up loud, I am having a good day! I am trying to shut the noise out. I was going to do some gardening but the noise outside is hurting my ears.

    This morning I went for a walk up a track on a small hill without too much pain in my ankle. I stopped for a while and heard some delightful birds and a lamb bleating in the distance. I feel sorry for the lambs and the farmers, as there is no feed at all in the paddocks except for what the farmers supply.

    I did manage to get to the art exhibitions in the end! In some of them I was allowed to take photos so captured some of the creativity of others and felt inspired to do more crafts myself. Some places had some brochures so I took those and will place them in the hope/happiness journal.

    Yesterday I went out for a drive with another lady and we had a lovely day out. I have written down different things about our outing so will add that to the journal too and may print out some photos sometime to go with it as well.

    Your point Deebi about expanding on the good things in life is something the Narrative Therapist shared with me. The more we expand on all that we enjoy and that makes us happy and positive, the more our minds will concentrate on such things and reduce the power the negatives have in our lives.

    So for now I am going to concentrate on engaging with people here on the forum, then will be creative in my journal and maybe listen to some music while I do some craft.

    Why to the Australia Footy League umpires have to blow their whistles so loudly and so often! Ha. Ha. I can hear them even with the door to the office shut!

    Hope you are all having a good day!

    Cheers from Doolsy

    2 people found this helpful
  22. Doolhof
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    8823 posts
    28 April 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    Hi All,

    Today the other neighbour is using the angle grinder between thumping stuff very loudly!

    I can't stay inside another afternoon so will just have to put up with the noises.

    It was a lot quieter living in the city! Ha. Ha.

    Hope you are all having an enjoyable day!

    Cheers from Dools

    2 people found this helpful
  23. Ggrand
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    28 April 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    Hello Mrs Dools...

    i have a person 3 doors down that works on cars...so noisey at times...Being in the country with out all the suburban noises, the grinding banging etc seems to echo so much..

    I bought myself some earplugs..they don’t block it all out but they do sullen the sharpness of the noise...maybe that’s something that may help you when he decides to be so noisy...Just my thoughts Mrs Dools..

    How are both your physical and mental health today dear lady?

    Please enjoy your day as much as you can today..

    Love and hugs Mrs Dools..💜🤗..

    Grandy...

    1 person found this helpful
  24. demonblaster
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    28 April 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    Hiya dear Doolsy Grandy 💑 and readers ☺

    Oh Doolsy you're not winning are you 🤗

    🎧 I've borrowed these heavy duty ear plugs from good man Croixy. Have you noticed extreme annoying sound we tune in and out of thank goodness. Over a long period of time I've been working on how not to let it stress and annoy me...no clues yet 😅 nah very slowly getting there.

    Dogs seems to be my curse in this area, both places we live/d incessant and I'm talking literally hrs. I'm impressed with myself (searching for large head emoji) I'm starting to quiet him down (friends across the road it's when they're not home) and I know their hearing's several times stronger than ours although I'm quite loud. I'm happy because I've found a gentler way than putting gruff in my voice.

    Sounds devine the lambs bleating and birdies. Sounds so barren where you are I'm so pleased when I hear of the goods. Esp when you get to the beach.

    Heard you at Grandys, same absolutely adore trees, I'll mention them and a gorgeous flower shrub on recent walks on Shells walking thread sometime. Theres so much mindblowing beauty in nature, we scored well living on Earth from what they've seen so far we absolutely got the pick of the crop.

    Really liking how you're going Doolsy handling this all. Yes goods crowd our minds less room and time for bad thoughts. Our brains don't ever stop so while we're controlling our thoughts we're winning.

    Bbl (be back later) hun 🖐☺🤗

    1 person found this helpful
  25. Doolhof
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    Doolhof avatar
    8823 posts
    29 April 2019 in reply to demonblaster

    Hi again DB Grandy and All,

    Thanks for the idea about ear plugs. I have tried a few. Someone suggested watching a clip on how to put them in properly as I do find the ear plugs hurt my ears after a while. I've tried ear muff thingys as well.

    The neighbour eventually finished his work so I did get outside for a while. I watered some of the garden at least. Didn't seem to have the energy for anything else.

    Had a second session with a new counsellor. This time she asked me to fill in one of those questionnaires rating how you feel and cope with different things over the last 2 weeks and month. By the time she had worked the program out on the computer, it was time for me to leave, so no real counselling happened.

    Maybe next time!

    I went for a walk in a park after and tried to appreciate the different bird calls I could hear and the surroundings. Some of the gum trees had their trunks highlighted in the sun and almost looked white. They were stunning against the blue sky and green of their leaves.

    I'm trying to ignore the few aches and pains I have and am trying hard to not allow those negatives to get a hold. I will choof them off before they can grow!

    Need to think about how I will fill in my evening so it feels more positive. Maybe I will do some drawing and see what happens.

    Cheers all from Dools

    3 people found this helpful
  26. demonblaster
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    1 May 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    Hey Mrs Doolsy ☺ Grandy and all 👋

    I remember the ear plugs.
    Was just thinking maybe you could listen to music when you learn how to put them in and or get some music on your phone when you learn how.

    If you type in the address bar at the top anything you want to know theres a lot of info on the net.
    Alternatively if you have a music system that you could plug these 🎧 type into while there's noise around could make it more bearable.
    I don't know but if they hurt your ears it might be the shape of your ears like mine I have trouble keeping them in. I imagine now days theres a few choices for listening devices. You might find over the ears easier.

    Watering was a good choice it's quite cathartic. Very hard when we don't have the energy poor darl it's horrid.

    I would hope the counsellor makes up that time to you. It wasn't your fault she had trouble with the programme. Lets hope she's good for you dear Doolsy.

    Sounds lovely the park walk oh and was happy hearing your foot the other day was a bit kinder.

    Have you seen Ghost gums they're a Whitish one too. Sounds gorgeous that sight. Maybe you could add that description to your hat box.

    Did you manage some drawing? I like how you try so much it's never easy in depression but you push through.

    Regarding your pain.
    Meditation has shown to be of great help with mental and physical pain.

    They had 3 groups of people I might be a tad hazy.

    • Group 1 meditated

    • " 2 had placebo pain meds

    • " 3 pain meds

    The meditation group when the same pain was inflicted had quite a higher tolerance to it.

    I read somewhere here and very true many say it doesnt work but it needs practice. Though on saying that I believe there's hope for most people because most of the time my memories in an out and concentration has always been poor esp of course in poor mh. Throw mania into the mix and concentration goes out the window because we're hyper (high) focused on the lightening speed of accelerated thoughts which are mega fast anyway.

    A couple of times in wayyy higher mania days than now I managed with little practice over the yrs a few seconds maybe 20 give or take. It not only worked it helped calm me. I was in a state the stress is high even though it's great.

    I'll talk more on it if you're interested.

    Keep the good memories and happy thoughts rolling darl and remember to feel the thoughts. Only good ones let the yuks move through with the wind.

    🤗

    2 people found this helpful
  27. Ggrand
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    1 May 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    Hello Mrs Dools...

    I worked in a noisey paper folding factory for over 16 years and it waa s a necessity to wear or no job.....The ones I wore wereca very soft rubber that fits comfy in the ear....The foam ones..they hurt and I couldn’t wear them....I know you can buy on line at eBay...I am so pleased he finished enough for you to water your garden....My gareden has a few surviving geraniums..and some cactus and succulents..and that’s about all...Mrs Dools, did you know...that snakes won’t go near geraniums...Lots of houses have them here..and the colours are beautiful....

    I hope so much that you connect with your new counsellor...That’s okay darl..They need to do that test to help you the best they can.....I hope next visit for you will be easier and more helpful for you..🤗..

    Your walk sounds like you were being very mindful of your surroundings...Their are a ghost gum trees out my way..they are as all the rest are beautiful....

    We are expecting rain on Friday..I hope that the rain finds its way to my little village....

    Those negatives are sneaky Mrs Dools...but our positives are stronger and can with practise overcome our negatives...and Choof it off...

    Evening are harder to fill with our time then daytime...I never used to but now watch a few tv shows that I know are safe from triggers..I just started drawing and enjoying drawing squiggles lines and colouring in between...Ha..Ha. the new Michael Anglo...or there’s the online jigsaws are not too bad....

    I hope today was okay for you dear friend...

    Lots of caring hugs and love Dear precious Mrs Dools..🤗💜..

    Grandy....

    2 people found this helpful
  28. Doolhof
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    8823 posts
    2 May 2019 in reply to Ggrand

    Dear DB and Grandy,

    It really is so very kind and wonderful of you both to drop by and have a "chat".

    I have Smiling Mind on my phone and it was recommended I listen to that 3 times a day. I keep forgetting to do so! Somehow I will try to make that a habit.

    Yesterday I didn't go to the writing group, I had some energy so cleaned all the dirt out of the patio area. The plants changed colour when I poured water over them! Wandered about in the garden for a while picking up sticks.

    We had a little rain which was so lovely! Now the plants in the garden are clean again! No more layers of dirt on everything. Hope you get some rain Grandy.

    Last night I felt like I was kicked in the guts again when my husband was very discouraging. I wanted to run away but felt like I had no where to go. It was too darn cold to drive somewhere and sleep in the car, plus my car is tiny!

    So I stayed home and tried to deal with my negative thoughts and stop them from spiralling down. I did a lot of choofing Grandy! Ha. Ha.

    Those negative thoughts do feed off each other if we are not careful! Husband discouraging, Mother in law not having any gluten free food for me Saturday except potatoes, Narrative therapist didn't send me a report like she said she would, counsellor fluffing about on the computer the whole session, MH worker not returning my calls, no work, no money, back aching...Need to change this line of thinking!

    Yes DB I have been told to try meditation. I know it could be beneficial, just a matter of doing it! Maybe I will listen to Smiling Mind after my shower this morning.

    I'm off to the Op Shop today.

    It would be so easy to go back to bed and feel totally defeated right now...but what is the point of that!

    Cheers again ladies and thanks so much for your care! Hugs to you both from Dools

    3 people found this helpful
  29. demonblaster
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    7817 posts
    2 May 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    Hi Doolsy Grandy 💑 and all ☺
    Oh darl it's so incredibly hard to lift when so much is stacked against. For now it is. In time even small changes for the better can happen.
    A small package of hope 🌞

    Feel the love and strength transferring to you from this which I must admit with a big heads an extremely good 🤗 hug. I should charge💲

    Hearing about hubby honestly makes me want to have a word with him. That's so sad Doolsy.
    When someone especially 24/7 in your life isnt supportive and berating you, well you know what it does.

    Does he realise how much he's hurting you which maybe not I think he has MH too, ? Autism spectrum which blocks awareness of feelings or I may be confused with someone else. Either way it's not on!

    Hun I think but not sure I have BPD too. If not I do have a strong understanding of how it is to go right down and stay there with lifes littles 🎁 of joy.

    What I'm slowly starting to learn to do is yes we feel it hard, no choice really. Pains automatic at this stage for now anyway not necessarily in the future. I'm working on a reply. Be back later (bbl) or bbs (soon.

    Would you like me to remind you at times or daily about smiling minds.
    Something else, maybe you could draw a smiley face and plant them around the place including in your hand bag kitchen bedroom lounge bathroom fridge where you sit etc.

    Go the choof power! 💪 Strength we've all got it, its just playing hide and seek. We have the intelligence resources and 👀 to seek. We need to believe that cause it's true and helps open pathways in our minds to find the blighters.

    Honestly Dools this counsellor lovey it sounds like youre going to need to put her straight it can be said nicely on doing her job you're so in need of help and shes wasting your visits. Makes me 😤mad when people don't do their jobs properly. They get paid for it esp in a helping profession.

    For now lovely can I suggest put your focus on your happies. Might be a very good time to open your hat box with all the goods & distraction. Your mind needs to be having a break from pain.

    Here's some help. Have a little think about these Doolsy lovey how you feel when you see them what you hear how do they feel to touch, colour etc.

    🕊🦅🐣 birdies

    🦋

    ⚘🌻

    🌞

    🌲🌴🌿trees nature

    🕊 peace hun. It's honestly in our grasp. I know that now.

    Love care and a LOT of no calorie gluten free fattening joys of choccy 🍫🍰🎂🍨🍟🍔🥓

    😀🤗


  30. Ggrand
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    2 May 2019 in reply to Doolhof

    Hello Mrs Dools, Deebi and all...

    Yes the negatives feed of the negatives making them grow and become much more overpowering then they should be..Please Mrs Dools..also our positives work the same way..they also feed off each other and become more powerful then our negatives...Try as hard as you can to bring that first positive thought to the front of your mind so it can keep growing....

    Its wonderful that your part of the world had a Mother Nature clean up...Were supposed to get tomorrow some rain...I really hope the weather people gets it right..😂...

    My first instincts are to run away...Problem with that is our negative thoughts also come with us..okay If we can leave them at home and only our positives come with us🤗...unfortunately it doesn’t work that way...and we always have to come back...

    Mrs Dools...Good girl choofing those thoughts away...your doing a good job...I can understand about feeling how you did with your hubby...the hurt goes deep and eats away eats away at us...but we have to remember that we don’t have to believe discouraging words...They are untrue...We do our best and that’s all we can do..Please believe in you dear lady...Have you and hubby sat down and have you told him about how he is making you feel?...

    Oh Deebi...I have so many smiley faces around my home..they remind me of you..I even coloured them in with your avatars colours and drew the best I could 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 with Deebi bbff...written underneath...🤗.It helps me to know I’m cared for and you are awmis.....I hope you don’t mind....It’s a great idea Mrs Dools...

    Im free to come to yours Mrs Dools and help you eat the yummies Deebi has left you....We could sit outside and look at the trees and listen to the birds...if that’s okay...

    Your constantly amazing me Mrs Dools with the way you continually try to find peace...as Deebi said and I believe her..that peace 🕊..is within our reach...it could be just around the next corner or in the next new day..keep reaching towards it dear Mrs Dools...

    Hoping Your today at tgevop shop gives you some lightvand some relief from your depression...💕💕..

    Sending you my love, care and hugs 💜💜🤗..and a beautiful 🌈...

    Grandy...

    1 person found this helpful

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