How very kind and thoughtful of you to drop in. I greatly appreciate your kind words. So often I do not see any good in myself.
I have had some really horrid days and I have tried to accept them. I have lists of coping strategies somewhere! I need to maybe write them up, decorate the page, even have it laminated and placed somewhere handy.
My journaling has not been happening, so maybe I can get back into that.
We are now out of quarantine. I am volunteering and working today and have been asked to work longer hours so at least today my mind will be occupied with work and not my own thoughts I sometimes have trouble controlling.
Yesterday I pushed and encouraged myself. I packed a picnic lunch, grabbed a rain jacket and told myself I was going to drive to a conservation park. Here in S.A. we are no longer in lock down so it is thankfully possible.
I didn't just drive around the block and then head home again as I have done in the past! I went to the conservation park. I saw kangaroos, fungi, tiny little flowers on the ground, wattle in bloom and so many other beautiful aspects of nature.
The tears were flowing and that was okay. I went to a look out to have my lunch. It started to rain and it was windy so I retreated to my car.
I am thankful for the opportunity to be able to go out.
There is a lot I can do to help myself. When you are in that dark place it is so hard to be motivated.
As I slowly recover, I am going to organise that list of things to do.
Hopefully I will learn what did not work so well, accept that and try again.
I'm off to work shortly so this day will be filled.
DB I hope you are doing okay. I've not ventured all that far on the forum lately. Kind regards to you from Dools