I am a university student and studying Accounting. I don't hate it but it's not my main passion. My passion is piano and Applied but I can't see myself as a teacher. I see myself as a performer, which is a career that doesn't pay the bills. As for Mathematics, there are not a lot of job prospects. I plan to study Music and get a part time Accounting job after obtaining my Accounting degree but I have a dilemma. I might not maximise my career. If I talk to my parents, it will be the same conversation. Do I love Accounting? Me: Yes (lie). P: Fight for it! If I tell the truth, I will get my dad angry and getting my dad angry and disappointed in me is worse than any failure in exam. I want to talk to my mum but, being the idiot she is since she works in a menial job, can't help me so, I have no choice but to turn to my dad. My dad is smart since he is working for his ph.D however, I had a traumatic experience with him. No abuse whatsoever but he once got extremely cranky just because I couldn't understand a Math question. I remember that he nearly threw a glass to a wall just because I couldn't understand it but I have no choice but to talk to him since he is the smart one. Talking to him feels like being in a hot seat. Despite having provided me with resources and my mum claiming that he loves me, I call bullsh*t. I don't want to have to do anything with him. I just can't wait to cut my entire family off, particularly my dad. Talking to him makes my blood boil. My mum wants me to talk but I don't want to since I feel like that I'm in a hot seat. I prefer to suffer in silence. To exacerbate things, I feel pressured to lose weight because my family members in Indonesia will tease me if I don't. I once ended up wailing to my parents that I don't want to go back to Indonesia because of this. My mum, being the block-head she is, doesn't understand that, more than once, I almost become anorexic. She told me to just ignore them. This just makes me feel horribly alone. I don't know what to do and I just think that death is the best answer. If anyone can give me any advice that will be great.