First off I regret the length of time before you got a reply, it is not you and it is not the subject of your post, it is a system that does not always behave as we would like.
I'd have to say the world has handed you a very hard road to travel, many would not have made it this far. I do not know why it is but many people that are treated by sub-humans as the objects of their cruelty and lust come to blame themselves, think they are of less worth than 'normal' people and that for some reason less entitled to a good life.
It's completely wrong of course, though I suspect trying to convince you of that will be hard. Having read your story I see you as "the good and the beautiful and the worthy and the striving and the deserved", not other people.
My hopes your disability is not major and that the robbery did not leave you too broke are genuine, but only words on the screen.
I don't know much about you but perseverance shine's though from your past, as does a way of talking that is expressive and effective. Plus a dash of -I don't know - that made you post here.
When I wanted to kill my self with nothing left in life -or so I believed, that was not much anyone could say I'd believe. PTSD, depression and anxiety had narrowed down my view of the world to hopelessness, self blame and nothing better.
I was shown something to cling to to get my mind away, fantasy books. A kind nurse gave them to me. More years later that I'd want to think about I still read similar. Though I'm a changed person. Not 'cured' but capable of a life that is pretty good, with love given and received, support the same, and an occupation that makes me feel good bout myself -accomplishment.
So I've done all the talking Ween, perhaps you would like to talk back, I'm not so far removed from you I'd find it all strange and alien, quite the reverse. My injuries were not yours, but we have both been injured by those that to put it politely, regard others as expendable.
Your picture is restful and away from hassles. may I ask why you chose it?
I hope you reply