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Forums / PTSD & Trauma / Poems by mmMekitty *TW*

Topic: Poems by mmMekitty *TW*

11 posts, 0 answered
  1. mmMekitty
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    24 April 2022

    Hello everyone,

    I’ve written poems with content which some people may find distressing to read.

    I write to express thoughts & feelings. Sometimes these are vivid.

    I welcome any response from anyone, whether comments or with poetry of your own.


    * Pacific Shore

    Thinking too much. Now I'm in pain,
    All those memories come up again,
    Who can stop the memories, put them out?
    Who hears my whimpering effort to shout?
    "Go away! Get off of me!
    You're not the brother I want you to be!"

    I can understand, but Mommy,
    I can't ignore - you weren't there for me.
    Money can’t replace your protection.
    No money makes up for a lack of affection.
    Casting your ashes off a Pacific shore
    Won't bring us together, no, no more.

    [April 2022]


    * Shipwreck

    A shipwreck,
    Tossed about at sea,
    splintered boards,
    Rubbish & debris,
    A broken heart,
    A shattered me.

    [April 2022]

    mmMekitty

    2 people found this helpful
  2. Sophia16
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    24 April 2022 in reply to mmMekitty
    I love these. Very beautiful and deep.
    1 person found this helpful
  3. mmMekitty
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    24 April 2022 in reply to Sophia16
    Thank you, Sophia 16 😸
  4. mmMekitty
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    26 April 2022 in reply to mmMekitty

    I thought I'd add this poem to this thread, because the wintery weather has triggered some feelings in me, which I wrote about in January 2020.

    * ICE

    Stuck on ice, frozen,
    Brittle, exposed skin turns blue.
    Shivering ceases,
    As does the heart and breath,
    And thinking itself
    Stops recording life in flesh
    Frozen in blue ice.

    …and…

    Mindless:
    Don’t see how the ice was sculpted;
    Don’t see how the ice was carved;
    Don’t see how the ice has cracked and broken;
    Don’t see how the ice is scarred
    Faceless.

    …or…

    Careful, carefully, with care,
    Paint familiar features
    On this faceless mask,
    Showing you do so, even if not,
    For those left out in the cold,
    Truthfully, true, and truly,
    Whoever it is, is worth tears
    Of melting ice.

    …and/or…

    Hold the ice in your warm hand.
    Watch it melt and drip away,
    Trickling through your fingers,
    Like any old, ordinary sand.

    ***

    mmMekitty

    1 person found this helpful
  5. sbella02
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    27 April 2022 in reply to mmMekitty

    mmMekitty,

    Your writing is incredible. The imagery with this one in particular:

    Hold the ice in your warm hand.
    Watch it melt and drip away,
    Trickling through your fingers,
    Like any old, ordinary sand.

    I'm a writer myself, I'm in absolute awe.

    Have you ever considered entering your work in any competitions? I can recommend a few organisations that run some, if you're interested :)

    SB

    2 people found this helpful
  6. mmMekitty
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    28 April 2022 in reply to sbella02

    zhi SB,

    Thank you for your comments. 😺

    I have a couple times, but I guess I don't write what the judges want to read. I don't want to even vaguely, not even unconsciously, tailor my writing for what judges or readers might want. I do my writing for me, to express thoughts & feelings, as a way of processing those thoughts & feelings & the events which gave rise to them.

    Sometimes I wish no one would be able to relate to anything I write, because that would mean they haven't experienced anything like what I have. I'm sad thinking that others hav, knowing how these things keep happening year after year, decade after decade, generation after generation.

    then again, I am glad when people relate, & feel not so alone, feel that someone else knows what they have been through, what they feel now, so I want to share my poems for these reasons.

    I began just pouring out these words I heard in my head, like taking dictation, & much didn't make much sense, nor was it directly related to things happening or how I was doing my utmost NOT to feel or think about. Then there was a time I din't write much. Then I began again & joined a writers' group, &began to work on those first thoughts & hone mypoems & storie, without losing any of the intent or meaning. Now, I think, I want to be sure my words communicate something TO someone. I'm not shouting into the wind, having my words blown back into my face, anymore.

    So I welcome feedback & comments, even critical appraisal. 😺 But I don't want to change anything to please anyone or make the content gentle & light to read, when the experiences are anything but.

    Warm regards,

    mmMekitty

    4 people found this helpful
  7. mmMekitty
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    8 May 2022 in reply to mmMekitty

    This poem, 'Winter' I wrote in May 2020

    * Winter

    Winter is coming.
    I want some real, deep warmth.

    Put your arms around my sore body.
    Let me snuggle in tight,

    But don’t dare trust me
    To be unafraid to trust you.

    Then, ignore that and hold me,
    Until I decide, I can bear up.

    What if, your holding is enough
    To carry me through Winter?

    ***

    It's a scary thought, actually.

    mmMekitty

    2 people found this helpful
  8. mmMekitty
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    14 May 2022 in reply to mmMekitty

    Just thinking of the ways we have found to cope & protect ourselves when too young & immature to know better ways. I originally wrote 'Another Pet' in 2018.

    * Another Pet

    I am the elephant in the room,
    The trouble, you say,
    Oh, the worry and concern,
    The shame and the embarrassment,
    The thing no one talks about,
    The taboo lurks all over me.
    You are the monkeys:
    You shut your eyes,
    Stop your ears,
    And zip your lips,
    For fear of sinking ships.
    I am the one you lie about.
    You say it was because of the flood.
    To keep the truth from coming out,
    You tell me, if anyone asks,
    Lie and say, I was sick.
    You say that school has a special class for her,
    Say anything but the truth.
    Because she will be away
    From the old school.
    Other kids won’t do what she did,
    There will be no copy cats.
    then everyone can relax.
    We’ll go on with our lives,
    we will have no problems here.
    We have another secret between us,
    Publicly shared; privately alone,
    I will be another pet.
    I am a small grey mouse,
    You groom, feed and kind of love,
    And train to walk a tightrope.
    Trying to neither jump nor fall,
    I turn secrets into my own.
    I find a corner of the nest,
    And think about how to endure the lies.

    mmMekitty

    2 people found this helpful
  9. mmMekitty
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    14 May 2022 in reply to mmMekitty

    ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️to the 'people found this post helpful'. 😺

    mmMekitty

  10. sbella02
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    17 May 2022 in reply to mmMekitty
    That's really beautiful - you have a quite a talent for poetry.
  11. mmMekitty
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    17 May 2022 in reply to sbella02
    Thank you, again.😸

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