I am so sorry you are going through so much at the moment. Being in that dark place is awful, well.....more then awful. I wish I could take away all of it for you, so you wouldn't have to be there. I can send a hug out to you if you like hugs.
That must be so hard to have a father that tried to commit suicide. I am not sure exactly how I would feel in your place there. But maybe I would feel a lot of different emotions ranging from very deep sadness, rejection, shattered, grief, troubled, abandoned, fear, a feeling of being let down and even anger and bitterness maybe. It is hard because we just want our dad's to love us.
I know you said you dad is living in Thailand and you think it may help if you could vent out and scream at him. Maybe you could vent out on here, just let it all out whatever it is you want to say to him. Just get it out from within your heart. If you don't feel comfortable venting it here, maybe you could write him a letter telling him how you feel, how he has hurt you etc. And write with pure honesty, hold nothing back. And once you have written the letter, imagine he is in the room with you. Then read the letter out loud. And if you start to cry or anything, just let the tears fall. Maybe you could burn the letter afterwards or something.
When I have felt the need to scream it has come from the emotion of anger, frustration, hurt, the feeling of being let down or a feeling like" this is all too much". Is that how you feel then?
I agree with Ravenq it is beautiful that your dear mum camped out in your room like that. I am so glad you have her. You are truly blessed to have such a loving mother.
I am not sure if anything I have written is helpful to you, but please know we care about you and you are not alone.
Much love to you now