I've had problems with him my entire life. He has a cycle of we don't talk because he has done something to hurt me, then he acts all nice to draw me back in, and then he does something else to stab me in the back or he uses verbal abuse to ruin my day or week. He ruined the last Christmas and ghosts me every time my birthday comes around just to get out of doing anything like going to dinner or ever giving me a gift, but he demands I buy him bourbon. I bought him some drinks for his last birthday and because it wasn't a slab of beer like I got my mum, he went off his head and verbally abused me in the car when I was out for a day trip with him and my mum.
I just got my own place and even trying to move my stuff in, he has to control every little thing about moving. He tries to make me walk backwards and I told him no, we both walk sideways to make it easier, he gets angry over that. I asked him to help me lift the TV unit over half a meter and he started yelling at me (mind you all the neighbours can hear) to take the TV off the unit then move it. I yelled back "I said no, we don't need to" and he puts the unit down, raises his fist and threatens to punch my new flatscreen TV, and then walks out to my back door and slams it twice the hardest I have heard anyone slam a back door. It reverberated all around the house, and I was horrified that he would do that to my new property. I checked the door for damage and as it previously clicked into place on the day I got the keys, now you have to pull noticeably hard to shut it. There are no cracks in the plaster or door frame but my heart is already broken.
I tried explaining to my enabling mother that this is meant to be a time of celebration and the best in my life, and he finds a way to ruin everything again. She caught me checking the door again for damage today and told me "its not damaged, stop looking" even though I have explained this to her time and again, and there is physical proof because it doesn't shut properly, she flat out denies it and says that I am basically making it up, trying to make a liar out of me. I had to use my car to move stuff as he refuses to help out and I got a scratch on my upholstery because I have to move stuff in my car now.
If anyone has any carpentry knowledge and can reassure me, please do. I have bad anxiety and now I am scared that there is some internal damage that I can't see and is going to ruin my house, and I'm not even moved in yet. I can't even enjoy it now :(