Hello Will it ever happen, thanks for your thread and it's a concerning one, especially when you have lost friends who may have had thoughts they didn't feel comfortable talking to others about and perhaps if they allowed this, then they may still be with you.
We all differ, some people can sort out their problems by themselves or need advice on how to to do it, one way or another they could avoid doing something, other times the situation they're in doesn't make it any easier for them to resolve.
There can be other ways to cope with these thoughts cause they come and go and any action can be diverted by actually talking with someone, a person who wants to listen on why you feel this way.
The longer you conceal your thoughts the bigger the problem they become, because people want to get you to turn that switch off by listening to why you feel this way, and they may have been in exactly the same position as you, know how you feel, want to help you and divert these thoughts away from doing something you don't want to do.
I know myself from having a young baby can certainly affect how the family unit, not only in how it feels but also the disruption it can cause from our previous few months and there is help out there for all of you and if this has been organised then how you are feeling might change, but would really like to hear what you think.