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Forums / Supporting family and friends with a mental health condition (carers) / Emotional trauma helping my partner through

Topic: Emotional trauma helping my partner through

3 posts, 0 answered
  1. laureah21
    laureah21 avatar
    16 posts
    25 February 2022

    Hi everyone,

    Two weeks ago our young dog died suddenly of cancer. We took him to the vet thinking he had a sore leg and next thing he died in surgery to remove a burst tumour.

    The last two weeks our other young dog who had given blood for his brother stopped eating properly. We thought he was grieving his friend as the events coincided. His lethergy and refusal to eat got bad after two weeks of decline we took him to the vet. He has cancer. Lymphoma stage three

    yesterday we had to decide chemo or pallative care for him. Hardest decision.

    i have gone numb and seemed to have shifted into get things done mode. I havent cried yet really. Just butterflies in my tummy.

    i feel a need to protect my husband who is not coping. He takes antidepressants already, but yesterday he told me he was in the supermarket and just stopped. He felt like he wasn't real and nothing around him was and forgot where he was for a moment.

    He wont stop crying which i think is good and normal but i was a bit concerned about this other event. He cant make any decisions so i have sort of taken over

    id like to know what this is other episode was and if there is anything i can do to help him. I think my grief will come when its over in the mean time i need to help him.

    1 person found this helpful
  2. Guest_7403
    Guest_7403 avatar
    413 posts
    25 February 2022 in reply to laureah21
    It's called disassociation, when the mind becomes to overwhelmed it sort of shuts down and you experience a nothing feeling. Its fairly normal for people undergoing his stress etc
    1 person found this helpful
  3. Ggrand
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Ggrand avatar
    10022 posts
    26 February 2022 in reply to laureah21

    Hello Dear Laureah21,

    Im deeply sorry to hear about the passing of your gorgeous fur baby and to hear of your other gorgeous fur baby being very sick....They really are loving members of our families...

    I think that while you’re supporting your husband and trying to help him in the loss of one of your fur baby, you are finding it hard to grieve as your lending what strength you have to him....In time i certain that you will grieve and the flood gates will open....and I so much hope that you have someone there to help support you...

    We are not Drs nor professional people here, but it really does sounds like disassociation....Maybe a trip to your Dr. may help you both in getting a diagnosis for you husband and at the same time you could reach out to your Dr, for any help that need to get through this terrible time you are going through...

    We are here for you lovely laureah, please don’t hesitate to talk here if you feel up to it..

    Sending you my kindest thoughts, with my care..


    1 person found this helpful

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