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Topic: Burnt Out

12 posts, 0 answered
  1. 2girls3boys
    2girls3boys avatar
    2 posts
    12 November 2021

    Hi,

    First time seeking support. I’ve been feeling empty and sad for a number of years, some days are fine and other days I am completely stressed out and overwhelmed and break down crying. I have just had my fifth baby, which was unplanned but I still love her to bits. Most days I don’t get a minute to myself until all the kids are asleep and then I’m so tired I just want to watch TV and go to bed. I have no desire to be intimate with my husband which makes me feel guilty and upset. I know I need to find ‘me’ time but even when I try to do things for myself, it’s very infrequent and doesn’t really cheer me up that much. I don’t have anything to look forward to other than returning to my job in a few months, which I love. I don’t have any close friends to talk to, only people I ‘hang out with’ because of my kids. I just don’t know where to start and how to feel better. Some days I just feel like walking out of my house and not coming back, but I could never do that to my family - it’s just the thoughts I have. Have I got post-natal depression? I think I do.. if I bring up how I’m feeling with my husband he tries to support me but I don’t think he understands how hard things are every day for me. Just need someone to listen really and I know I need to seek help but again I don’t have the time, and I put everything and everyone else before my own needs.

  2. Sophie_M
    Community Moderator
    • Works for beyondblue moderating these forums
    Sophie_M avatar
    6595 posts
    12 November 2021 in reply to 2girls3boys
    Dear 2girls3boys
    We’re so grateful to have you reach out to our community this morning and are so sorry to hear everything you have going on at the moment. Times like this can get overwhelming. We hope that you find our forums to be a safe and supportive space to talk through your thoughts and feelings. Our community is here for you. 

    We hope you know that there is always help available to you, whether it's from our professional mental health counsellors Beyond Blue (available 24/7/365 on 1300 22 4636) or our friends at Lifeline (13 11 14) or the Suicide Call Back Service (1300 659 467).

     
  3. geoff
    Life Member
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    geoff avatar
    16197 posts
    12 November 2021 in reply to 2girls3boys

    Hello 2girls3boys, and a warm welcome to the site.

    We aren't doctors to be able to give you a diagnosis but can suggest, but firstly, your day must be so complex looking after 5 children and whether or not you do have PND is for your doctor to determine, although it may be highly likely from what you've told us.

    You can't be intimate if you have no desire, and your husband needs to appreciate this because each day means you are occupied 24/7 with the demands of not only your children but also your husband and what else needs a decision on, so your day is full, so please don't feel guilty at all.

    I've suffered from PND myself and know how intense this makes you feel and suggest that you try and find time to contact your doctor, this is very important, cause you can't handle this alone and even talking with your husband is not the same as with your doctor.

    Sometimes in life, we need to put ourselves and it's at this point to ring and make an appointment, then plans for that day can be organised.

    All the best.

    Geoff.

  4. Petal22
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
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    Petal22 avatar
    1971 posts
    12 November 2021 in reply to 2girls3boys

    Hi 2girls3boys,

    Wellcome to our forums!

    Im sorry you are feeling this way, I understand.

    Having 5 children would be a huge task I understand how you would feel stressed out and would find yourself crying it would be exhausting! Lack of sleep also plays a part in this also I believe.

    If you are feeling overwhelmed and that things feel hard for you then PLEASE seek professional help ASAP……. There are treatments available for PND if it is this that you have.

    Please make an appointment with your gp and let them know how you are feeling and how it’s affecting your life.

    I understand that there are perinatal clinics that you can see up until the child is 5, they understand PND and PNDA conditions a clinical phycologist and psychiatrist sometimes run out of the same practice.

    Please seek the help that is available to you…….. if time is barrier then take your baby with you to the appointment.

    Its really not a nice place to be feeling the way you are feeling so please seek help so you can start to enjoy your days again…. You really can get better from this….just step forward.

    Ask me any thing

    1 person found this helpful
  5. quirkywords
    Community Champion
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    quirkywords avatar
    14277 posts
    12 November 2021 in reply to 2girls3boys

    2girls3boys

    welcome to this supportive forum,

    Sophie, Geoff snd Petal have given you helpful suggestions.

    I can feel your exhaustion through your words. Bringing up young children and 5 children would be exhausting . I had 3 children and I was tired all the time and I felt alone.
    Do you think when you return to work you will feel different. .?

    I think see a doctor or some of centres Oetsl suggested may help.

    You are not alone and we are listening.

  6. missep123
    Community Champion
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    missep123 avatar
    1039 posts
    12 November 2021 in reply to 2girls3boys

    HI 2girls3boys,

    From reading your post I can truly see how much you care about your children - being a parent is such a challenging role let alone to 5 children. I hope that when you return to work this might give you some time to yourself/be something that you look forward to.

    I wish I knew exactly what to say but I just wanted to come here and show some support!

  7. 2girls3boys
    2girls3boys avatar
    2 posts
    23 November 2021
    Thanks everyone for your words of support. I have since seeker help from a GP and am looking into different counselling options to see if that will help. Also my husband was worried about me and told my mum what I’m going through (which initially he lied about even though I thought it was odd she dropped in to check on me). But I ended up talking to her about it as well and have her support also. So feeling much better already just knowing I have help.
    1 person found this helpful
  8. Fee fee
    Fee fee avatar
    2 posts
    25 November 2021 in reply to Petal22
    Hi Everyone, seriously not sure where to begin, I am a 55 year old woman who recently had to take sick leave due to osteo and rheumatoid arthritis, Wow I love my job and feel real sad that I can not be there, have been off work since sept 20-2021, feeling pretty crap right now.
  9. quirkywords
    Community Champion
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    quirkywords avatar
    14277 posts
    26 November 2021 in reply to Fee fee

    Hello Fee Fee and welcome go the forum.

    I am suffering you are suffering with your illnesses and missing work.
    If you started your own thread more people would see it d be able to reply.

    How do I start a new thread?
    At the top of each section is a blue "new thread" button. Clicking on this will open a dialog box for you to start a new thread. You need to be registered as a member and logged in to see this button and post. You can start new threads in any section, except for the Long Term Support Over The Journey section, where the new thread button has been disabled.

    I f you have any questions go to the faq thread or post here.

    we are listening.

  10. Petal22
    Community Champion
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    Petal22 avatar
    1971 posts
    28 November 2021 in reply to Fee fee

    Hi Fee fee,

    Id like to wellcome you to our forums along with quirkywords …..

    Im sorry you are feeling this way.

    As quirkywords has said you can start your own thread if you want to so more of our caring supportive community can support you.

  11. missep123
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    missep123 avatar
    1039 posts
    28 November 2021 in reply to 2girls3boys

    Hi 2girls3boys,

    Thank you so much for updating us, I am so glad that you have been feeling supported! It can be incredibly difficult to open up to people about what you are going through, once you feel like you are not alone and that you are 'heard' and people understand what you are going through it can feel much better.

    Please keep us updated and reach out here whenever you'd like!

  12. missep123
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    missep123 avatar
    1039 posts
    28 November 2021 in reply to Fee fee

    Hi Fee fee,

    I am so sorry that you have been going through that, I can't imagine how painful osteo and rheumatoid arthritis must be. My mother has arthritis and I have really learnt how difficult it can be.

    Did you make a new thread? If so I'd love to respond there!

    We are definitely here for you though!

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