Hi, in spite of being a member since 2015, I haven't posted yet. I guess this is my first post.

I'm currently a first year university student, studying occupational therapy. I've been having mental health problems since 2015. While growing up, I had strict parents and I wasn't able to confide in them. I also grew up with not much and not much love, too.

My perspective of the world is complex, it's mainly about survival.
I don't really bother to tell the people closest to me because I don't think I have anyone close. My friend suggested this site for me because I've been having bad days. I think the days have gotten worse since I went to uni.

My sleep is interrupted. I feel this intense loneliness. I'm training to be a health professional but it's like I can't even take care of myself.

Thanks for reading!

Hi continuousventer,

welcome to beyond blue and good for you for taking the plunge and posting.

parts of your post resonated with me, and depending on space I might write about this. But the first I want to mention to you is that you said that you want to be a health professional but cannot look after yourself. I am doing a counselling dip. at the moment, and have put a Bth on hold. I was talking about this with some BTh lecturers and the one comment that sticks with me is that having a lived experience means that you can or will have a greater understanding of what someone is going through. I think this would apply to you as well.

Now, I was having sleep problems as well, which for me contributed to my feelings of depression and anxiety. My psychiatrist asked me if I was familiar with sleep hygiene. I was not, and she gave steps to help stay asleep. That and other tools from my psychologist to empty my mind before sleep.

What are some things that you like to do? Perhaps there are some clubs or groups at Uni you could join to overcome those feelings of loneliness. Personally this feeling you speak of was something I felt when I moved from a country town to the big city to go to Uni. It takes time to build relationships, and everyone builds relationships at different speeds.

And before I forget, are you able to contact student services or the Uni counselling services to discuss these problems? They might be able to give you ways to resolve these issues or point you in the right direction to get help.

I hope you will come back and chat some more.

Tim

Hello smallwolf

Aw thank you for your comment. That's what I try to tell myself because of my lived experience. Although I'm quite harsh on myself. Like I'm not very organised and I'm not very confident. Am I supposed to be a health professional or is just easier for me just drop out of uni and get a job somewhere else other than academics?

I think I don't sleep well because I'm harsh on myself and the workload. However, I'm going to try and sleep earlier from now on.

I like listening to music, dancing, eating, watching engineering videos on youtube bc it's so interesting to know why a bridge doesn't collapse. I think the reason why I am struggling is because I haven't found my type of people or I haven't put myself out there enough.

I can't access counselling at uni until I use all my bulk bill sessions. I really like my psychologist though.

But thanks for your post!

Hi continuousventer,

I cannot answer that question about whether you should be a health professional or not. Do you like the subjects you do? What I do know based on the times I was at Uni is there are always subjects that you might not like and/or core subjects that are not in your area of interest, and just have to bog down and do them.

And it is good to hear that you have professional support as well. Also handy to have someone to talk to, and better if you both get no with each other.

That trio of music, dancing and eating seem to remind me of my days at Uni many,many years ago. The Uni has a bar where local band played. Never really my sort of music - more Indy stuff, whereas my tastes were different. But I think it might be still work looking at clubs at Uni.

What would be your type of people?

Tim

Hello smallwolf

Sorry for the late reply, I've been a bit busy since I have exams next week. I didn't mean to ask you that question, it's just a question that is in my mind because I'm running late for buses, I'm not really looking like a health professional right now.

I think the subjects I'm doing are alright, it's just challenging. Like in school, it was always do-able and I wouldn't stress too much.

I don't know who are my type of people, just people I can laugh with and make the uni experience better like copeable