Hi All, I just joined and thought I share my story here. I am 45-year-old father of 2 kids, 13 and 11 who moved to Australia 25 years ago. Last December after years of marriage issues I left home and was living off a suitcase at different places. And in April this year my mum who lives overseas suddenly passed away from leukemia. I was very close to her, and her sudden death was a huge shock to me. At the same time my small business that I worked so hard over 5 years to build is facing a court battle for a wrong thing a former director did. Its like my perfect life has suddenly collapsed and since Last December I have battled depression and anxiety and depended heavily on alcohol to kill the pain. I have received helped but nothing has really worked so it’s a ongoing daily battle for me
I have 2 court cases coming up this week and next week for my business and separation. Last 2 weeks my depression and anxiety has skyrocketed with the unknown factor. Feels like if things don’t go in favour of me with the court cases there is no point of living. Last few days I have had suicidal thoughts but been hanging on. I just pray everyday hopping things will get better for me.

Hello Ari 1308 Thankyou for your post and welcome,

Im so sorry to hear what you have gone through that must have been tough!
And I'm so sorry to hear about your mum its hard having a loved one overseas who you couldn't see for a while and then losing her too would be something that you could never let go of :(
The pain will ease slowly

It seems like everything has all happened at once but please keep hanging on this rough patch ill pass!
Hopefully after these court cases things will become easier

I understand how you are feeling but please don't give up you have 2 beautiful children who need you
If the court does not go in favour try and accept it and move on, we must accept the things we can not change

In terms of suicidal thoughts you can contact Lifeline 24/7 on 13 11 14,
While it is OK to have suicidal feelings, it is important to reach out and let someone know how you’re feeling

Or contact the suicidecallbackservice.org.au on 1300 659 467 for a call to check in

Please reach out to one of these resources, and remember there is always support around for you please keep hanging on

Hi Ari1308,

Wellcome to our forums!

Im so sorry you are feeling this way I understand it would be very difficult.

Im sorry for the loss of you Mum.

I understand your business seems to be in trouble and I’m sorry this is happening.

I understand the horrible dark intrusive thoughts…. I also suffered with these when I was in the height of my anxiety, I learned that these thoughts usually accompany anxiety and depression.

I have now recovered from the condition I was going through and with the help I received from professionals these thoughts have now lifted.

The thoughts really scared me.

I highly recommend that you see your gp and discuss the type of thoughts you are experiencing and how you are currently feeling.

You could do a mental health plan together this will enable you to see a psychologist.

Things will get better for you, never loose hope and stay positive.

Hi Ari1308,

I am so sorry you have been going through this. You have come to the right place, we are here to help you as much as we can.

You can contact Lifeline 13 11 14 or the BeyondBlue hotline 1300 22 4636 if you need to talk to someone anytime. You have great children that need you and you are loved. The last sentence you said is key - things will get better you just have to push through every day. Many of us can relate.

Stay strong,

Jaz.

Hi Ari1308,

Thank you so much for sharing your story, and I'm so sorry for your huge challenge. I cannot image how hard it is for you.

I agree with Happyhelper88, that if you have suicidal thoughts, please call Lifeline. The accumulated stress is way too much, it's very necessary to prevent something really serious happen.

I think your kids love you very much, they cannot bear the pain of losing their great father. And I also believe that you moved to Australia for purpose, this is a dreamland and you deserve a happier life here.

A lot of people say that 2022 will be a great year, the overall environment will improve a lot. No matter continuing with your current business or start a new business, there will be a lot of new opportunities.

So don't lose hope, life will be better, business with be better.

Mark

Hi Ari1308 just checking in to see how you are coping x