Not now but I used to....similar.
I used to think if I didn't do something before I counted to three,,,that people would die (family)
Even as a child I would think "If I do not get out bed by the count three dad will die"
I have NO IDEA why but I was always out of bed by three.
It ruined my life.
NOW I am ok....although I still have sneaky stupid thoughts now and again...I ignore them.