Hey and welcome Sensitiveswan;
I'm sure Navy Blue will gain great insight from your post; it was lovely. Thankyou for your wisdom and kind words.
As usual, your beautiful gift of wise, purposeful and practical magic comes to the rescue. Navy Blue has assets unknown in the 'physical' community here on BB and is well deserving of our support ta-boot.
In my last post I referenced the Ode to Remembrance. After signing of the Armistice Treaty in 1918, the terms of peace were fought out in a locked room with ally rep's from each country. Long story short, the last issue to be dealt with was compensation for the 'fallen'...What is a man's worth?
This question was so difficult to answer; there were only a few men left to determine the outcome after many others couldn't engage anymore and went home. The importance of that debate however, is more relevant than the amount agreed upon for each family to receive.
Considering your worth re your service and contribution to your country, is valid. But your worth to your wife, children, extended family and even your community, has no monetary value equal.
In the armed service, duty, protocol, chain of command, rules, regulations and hierarchy is the premise behind survival. At home, 'choice' and 'options' and, consequences without an authority to be held accountable to, must seem foreign and new. Doubting yourself is par for the course, I know this first hand.
My family home was my war zone, as were many of the situations I confronted. My recovery depended solely on 'me'. Yes, I had my supporters, but at the end of the day (the going down of the sun) it had to be me who forged a new path with new rules, new purpose, and a new sense of confidence and 'self'.
BeyondBlue has given me purpose replacing my career (now medically retired) and renewed/validated my sensitivities, empathy and caring for others. It appeared at a time my 'worth' was so depleted, I felt lost beyond words. Being a sensitive man is soulful and rare; embrace it..please.
I thought about what I 'wanted' to be instead of what I 'thought' I'd lost. I was willing to do whatever it took to become that; I still am.
This is your personal journey of self discovery dealing with collateral damage. I'm here to guide and support you through the quagmire.
Kind and warm thoughts...Sara (Comforting hugs)