I'm so very sorry to read about the loss of your pregnancy. Some people don't realise just how much a pregnancy can mean, even if it lasts only a short few weeks. From the moment I learnt I was pregnant, I was so extremely excited and already had my heart filled with love for our child.
I'm really not in a mood for Christmas at all this year. If other people are than that is wonderful, I am happy for them.
I don't have plans to buy any gifts, to write out any cards or decorate the house. I think it is a combination of negatives from Christmas's past.
Last year was very horrid with family sending extremely negative messages at Christmas time. Very hurtful and nasty. The year before that I had a breakdown just before Christmas and was in hospital for a while.
I've tried to request an emergency appointment with my psychologist, I can't even get an appointment made for next year at present!
Thursday night I "ran away from home" or drove away at least. I didn't have any money so tried to sleep in the car. The temperature dropped to below 10 degrees and I started to get cold and my back was aching, so I returned home with my tail between my legs.
Yesterday another chook died. That is two in a month. My gardening companions are not doing too well!
Friends and family are wanting to catch up before we head off on the 19th of December and I don't want anything to do with Christmas this year.
Some days I am concerned I am going to go BANG.
As you mentioned I am reasonably tough. Some days I just don't feel like I am bouncing back so well! Ha. Ha.
I do feel a little better after having had a grump, so thanks for that!
Cheers for now from Mrs. Dools