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Forums / Long term support over the journey / UPDATED: I just feel alone and lost in a new world I don't like

Topic: UPDATED: I just feel alone and lost in a new world I don't like

  1. Graceeeeee
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    414 posts
    23 March 2016 in reply to Zetta

    Hey dear Zetta!

    Good news about the soccer carnival! Tell us if you are ever feeling down, it can be exhausting with lots of things going on, you can let yourself relax sometimes, or feel sad, whatever it is that you need to get yourself back on track :-) We have this lovely cafe in the Community Board section, you can pop by at anytime and have a nice chat with anyone if you want. Have a very good night and happy Easter weekend to you too Zetta! You are so sweet :-)

    With Love,

    Grace xx

  2. blondguy
    Life Member
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    24 March 2016 in reply to Zetta

    Hey Zetta

    I just thought I would wish you and your family all the very best for Easter :-)

    I hope your chronic pain gives you a break so you can have some peace

    Paul

  3. Zetta
    Zetta avatar
    110 posts
    24 March 2016 in reply to Graceeeeee

    Thank you Grace,

    I will definitely tell you guys when I'm down or sad.

    I'm just trying to focus on the things I can control at the moment like being as prepared as I can be for my surgery. Next week I have a full week of prep cooking for the weeks following my operation and just making sure I have help organised and a roster for when who is helping with what and what meals are being prepared and what household chores needs to be done. Just so that I can concentrate on resting and healing. This might sound silly to some people but I feel it's the best way to cope at the moment. I can't control much else so I'm focussing on what I can control and have control over. And by doing this I'm less stressed about my operation.

    I will pop over to the cafe when I have a spare minute! Thank you for the well wishes! I just want to wish you a very Happy Easter and a relaxing weekend!!

    Cheers,

    Zetta

    1 person found this helpful
  4. Zetta
    Zetta avatar
    110 posts
    24 March 2016 in reply to blondguy

    Hi Paul!

    Thanks for the well wishes!! I would like to wish you and all your family a happy easter and a relaxing weekend!!

    Happy Easter!!

    Zetta

  5. Lost Girl
    Lost Girl  avatar
    2696 posts
    24 March 2016 in reply to Zetta

    Countdown to camping! Yay!

    Thinking of you xx

  6. Graceeeeee
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    25 March 2016 in reply to Zetta

    Hey dear Zetta!

    It's nice to hear you are preparing everything you can, I hope the surgery goes well for you, you are very brave :) And it does feel very nice when you've got everything under control doesn't it! So good luck with making the roster and cookings and everything else, sounds like you are very busy.

    Thank you for the lovely wishes Zetta! I hope you can get some rest while being so busy :-) Big hugs to you XX Sleep well tonight!

    With Love,

    Grace x

  7. Zetta
    Zetta avatar
    110 posts
    26 March 2016 in reply to Graceeeeee

    Hey Grace, 

    Thanks soo much!! I'll take a break during the week to take the kids to the free holiday activities at our local mall just to relax and have fun with them! Since I have decided not to stress about surgery i'm not as anxious any more! A good friend of mine gave me the advice to be as prepared for the Unknown as possible and work on the things you can change instead of worrying about the things you can't change!! 

    That was a light bulb moment for me!! Our weekend so far is great and relaxing!! There's no one around and we're spending quality family time together!! I haven't felt this relaxed in months!! It's just wonderful what nature can do for you!! 

    Happy Easter!!

    Zetta

  8. Lost Girl
    Lost Girl  avatar
    2696 posts
    28 March 2016

    Hi lovely,

    I saw on the thankful feed that you have a beautiful campsite. I am so happy for you. Wishing you a beautiful weekend with lots of hugs from your family xx

    1 person found this helpful
  9. Zetta
    Zetta avatar
    110 posts
    14 April 2016 in reply to Zetta

    Hi there everyone!!

    Just thought I'll post up here that I have been doing great the last few weeks!!

    Unfortunetly I received some bad news last night. My mothers brother passed away yesterday. I'm feeling really down at the moment. Didn't sleep well last night and I'm very tired today it's hard to focus with the kids schooling today. I'm trying to hold it together but it hard.

  10. Starwolf
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    2521 posts
    14 April 2016 in reply to Zetta

    Hi Zetta,

    Good to read from you but I wish it could be in different circumstances. Coping with grief for the loss of a loved one is heartbreaking. I hope you can give yourself time to go through this process and that you will find support within your family to do so. My heart goes out to you.

    I am relieved to know that you have been doing well. So I guess your physical pain level has eased...a welcome break. Sometimes, we have to be grateful for small mercies.

    Thinking of you at this difficult time.

  11. Zetta
    Zetta avatar
    110 posts
    18 April 2016 in reply to Starwolf

    Hi Starwolf,

    Yes the pain has eased and made my life a little easier! I have started running again to get some well deserved me time and just to clear my head and just be able to let all my emotions out. It's been tough dealing with the loss of my uncle. This morning I had a moment where I found a Teddy Bear he gave to my eldest son before we left South Africa and I just cried!! That was the last time we saw him. My boys were great and just gave me cuddles and told me that it will be ok. They are at times my best comforters I have. Hubby has been really supportive too. I have been taking time to grieve on my own too.

    Thanks for being here and listening.

    Cheers,

    Zetta

  12. Starwolf
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    18 April 2016 in reply to Zetta

    Zetta, you're a gem. Your boys are right, it'll be OK, you'll get through this. How comforting to have family support... Good to know your husband rallied around too.

    Sometimes, a good cry is just what the doctor ordered. Grief must be embraced and that's exactly what you're doing.

    Thinking of you.

    1 person found this helpful
  13. Lost Girl
    Lost Girl  avatar
    2696 posts
    18 April 2016 in reply to Starwolf

    Hi Zetta,

    Sorry to hear of your loss. I am glad that your family are being supportive.

    I am glad that your health is somewhat better in the interim.

    Star has very eloquently said it all, embrace your grief lovely.

    Thinking of you xx

    1 person found this helpful
  14. Zetta
    Zetta avatar
    110 posts
    19 April 2016 in reply to Starwolf

    Thanks Starwolf,

    I appreciate your support. My Uncles funeral is on friday and I'm going to release some Yellow balloons in his memory on Friday! Yellow was his favourite colour! And have a beer for him!! Were having a BBQ on friday night with friends but I'm going to skype in on the funeral on friday night as it is being held in South Africa.

    Some days are fine and other days I just cry and I allow myself to cry and laugh about the good times too!! My mum is taking it hard as she can't go to the funeral and we've been calling each other a lot and been messaging and crying over the phone a lot too.

    Thank you for listening and just being here. I have been to soo many funerals I have learned how to deal with it.

    Cheers,

    Zetta

  15. Zetta
    Zetta avatar
    110 posts
    19 April 2016 in reply to Lost Girl

    Thank you Lost Girl,

    It's hard to deal with this loss, but were doing the best we can. I have been praying a lot lately too and that I think is part of why I'm dealing with it so well as I'm not carrying this alone. It's a relief that my pain is a lot less. It makes life soo much easier. It's now the countdown to surgery and the anxiety with that. Its nice to have such great support too. Thanks guys!!

    Cheers,

    Zetta

    1 person found this helpful
  16. Zetta
    Zetta avatar
    110 posts
    14 May 2016 in reply to Zetta

    Hi there everyone,

    I had my surgery yesterday and I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that I don't have endometriosis but the bad news is that I have another disease which I can't remember what it is. But it is treatable with the Mirena or a hysterectomy.

    So Here comes a bother big decision to be made this year. I'm doing alright with my recovery. Just still really tired.

    I'll keep you all posted as to how i'm going.

    Relived

    Zetta

  17. Lost Girl
    Lost Girl  avatar
    2696 posts
    14 May 2016 in reply to Zetta
    Great news Zetta xx
    1 person found this helpful
  18. blondguy
    Life Member
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    15 May 2016 in reply to Lost Girl

    Hey Zetta

    I know you have been through a lot of pain....

    (Hugs) and thinking of you

    Paulx

    1 person found this helpful
  19. Zetta
    Zetta avatar
    110 posts
    7 June 2016 in reply to blondguy

    Thanks Paul!!

    I have seen my specialist a few weeks ago and the outcome of the laparoscopy is that I don't have endometriosis but I have adenomyosis. And the only way to diagnose it properly is to have a hysterectomy. So my husband and I have decided that I will be having a hysterectomy. We haven't set a date for surgery yet as i'm not sure when we can afford to do it. It is a major operation and the recovery will be 6 weeks!! Which means I will need help for 6 weeks and my kids won't be able to do school for a few weeks!! This year seems to be really hard for us as a family!! And it's all happening one thing right on top of the other!!

    Feeling lost,

    Zetta!!

  20. blondguy
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    7 June 2016 in reply to Zetta

    Hey Zetta

    Really good to see you again! I dont blame for you feeling lost...My friend Pixi has just been given the same diagnosis.....I am really sorry as I dont think you saw that coming.....

    You are doing it really tough this year Zetta :-(......No advice from me except for my thoughts and a hugs for you..Paulxx

    I dont think I have ever typed a sad face on the forums. It means I respect your situation and your strength Z

    1 person found this helpful
  21. Zetta
    Zetta avatar
    110 posts
    12 June 2016 in reply to blondguy

    Thanks Paul,

    Yes it's really tough this year we just lost another family member(on my husbands side). And my sister is having trouble with her visa. It's just all getting to me. I just need a break!!! Thanks for your kind words!! It really means allot!!

    Hoping for a break!!

  22. Lost Girl
    Lost Girl  avatar
    2696 posts
    13 June 2016 in reply to Zetta

    Hey Zetta,

    I am hoping you catch a break soon too! Your positive attitude is amazing even though I know there are times you probably don't feel so strong and it probably all feels overwhelming. It will pass in time now you know what's happening and I hope then you get the peace you deserve.

    Kind thoughts,

    Carol

    1 person found this helpful
  23. Starwolf
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    13 June 2016 in reply to Zetta

    Hi Zetta,

    I hope your surgery can happen ASAP as it will mean a huge weight off your shoulders. Coping with hard times while battling physical health issues makes it all so much more difficult...

    I have often wondered why negative stuff is often dished out in seemingly endless streams.

    I am in awe of your courage and attitude and confident you can pass this endurance test with flying colours. My wish for you is that this year will redeem itself in its 2nd half. Like all else, hard times do pass...

    Thinking of you.

    1 person found this helpful
  24. Zetta
    Zetta avatar
    110 posts
    14 June 2016 in reply to Lost Girl

    Thanks Carol,

    I'm in the process of figuring out our finances to make the next operation possible. We're currently looking at doing it in September. And I'm busy planning my sisters wedding in the meantime, eek!! So it's a welcome distraction at this point in time!! It's fun organising things for her and helping her out too!!

    Thanks for your encouraging message!! I do hope things are looking up from here

    Cheers,

    Zetta

  25. Zetta
    Zetta avatar
    110 posts
    14 June 2016 in reply to Starwolf

    Hey Statwolf,

    Thanks for your message, yes I often wonder why it comes in such big forces, but I'm always amazed at how I grow stronger and become a better person for getting through it!!

    Some days it all just catches up with me and I feel like I can crack and other days i'm just fine!! I think once I get the physical pain sorted I will be better at dealing with the hard times. As I often feel more blue and down when I'm in pain. So that's one positive to look forward to. BUT then I'll have to deal with the loss of my fertility. Oh my I think I need to go see my counsellor more often in the lead up to my surgery.

    Thanks for your well wishes!! I'm off to bed to try and combat this flu!!

    Cheers,

    Zetta

    1 person found this helpful
  26. Zetta
    Zetta avatar
    110 posts
    16 August 2016 in reply to Zetta

    Hey everyone,

    Just a quick update on my wild roller coaster ride i'm on this year!! I'm just having a really hard year this year!! I have been pretty good lately until last week!!

    I have been going to church regularly and started to go to a connect group as well and started to reconnect with some of my old friends again.

    Then suddenly last week my whole week turned upside down when I was involved in a car crash. I wasn't at fault and my insurance had lapsed. Unfortunately for me the lady who hit my car is a single mum on pension and didn't have insurance either, and to top it all off my hysterectomy is booked for next month on the 13th!!

    I'm just having a really hard time at the moment dealing with all of this!! I'm just feeling lost and alone again!! I hope you all are doing well and taking care of yourselves.

    Much Love,

    Zetta

  27. Starwolf
    Champion Alumni
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    17 August 2016 in reply to Zetta

    Hey Zetta,

    Wow...that's another tight curve ! I hope no one was hurt...I guess you must be OK if you are posting in the forums. Where do the legal implications of this crash eave you ? Does it mean you will have to pay for damage repairs on your car ? I hope this doesn't leave you without transport for a while.

    At least, your operation is scheduled for the near future. Your health is a priority at the moment. Once you are feeling stronger, you will be able to cope with whatever Life throws at you.

    My thoughts are with you.

    1 person found this helpful
  28. blondguy
    Life Member
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    19 August 2016 in reply to Zetta

    'Wild Roller Coaster Ride' would be the understatement of the year Zetta

    The last time we spoke you had enough on your plate...Was the other driver on her phone or just didnt see you?

    You arent the only person whose insurance lapsed Zetta...

    Here for you

    (Hugs)

    Paulx

    1 person found this helpful
  29. Lost Girl
    Lost Girl  avatar
    2696 posts
    20 August 2016 in reply to blondguy

    Hi Zeta,

    What rotten luck! It seems very unfair on top of everything else.

    Star has wonderful advice though. Health first then you will feel stronger. She is amazingly wise.

    I hope you can find a way to manage in the short term. I understand the extra stress financial pressure can add. Will the other driver pay the debt off in installments? Do you have to go through court to sort it out due to the absence of insurance providers?

    On a happier note, how are the kids?

    Big hugs Zeta.

    Carol xx

    1 person found this helpful
  30. Zetta
    Zetta avatar
    110 posts
    23 August 2016 in reply to Starwolf

    Hey Starwolf,

    No one was hurt in the accident but the other driver just turned In front of me. She's a single mum on pension so at the moment i'm without a car until she can find the money to pay for it otherwise we will try the ombudsman first before we go to court.

    Its just an unending year of very Low blows for me! But I am stronger and I will get through this!! Thank you guys for all your support. I have just simplified my life at the moment so that i'm not too stressed and stretched at the moment.

    I'm just focussing on my operation and getting my car fixed at the moment so that I can be mobile and have my health back and be painless again!!

    Much love,

    Zetta

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