Long story short: I grew up in a poor home. Nonetheless, my mother did what she could to feed my sister and I. I was sent to live with my father at some point. He was a heavy drug-user and I barely ate so my mother even provided for me when I wasn't in her care. As such, I hold a level of respect and love for the lady. She, herself, came from a heavily abusive home and, as such, she is of a simple-mind and has major emotional issues now days.
I recently caught up with a relative who I haven't seen in years. We ended up in deep conversation about growing up (we are the same age), etc. This relative told me that when she would stay over my house when we were children, that my mother would physically abuse her nigh torture her. Some of the things my relative was saying was absurd; it wasn't smackings, it was serious physical abuse. It was upsetting, terrible things that my relative was claiming happened to her as a child, while in the care of my mother on some weekends and so forth. I dismissed these claims as I knew my mother, despite her own horrible upbringing, would not do these things to a child.
Then it happened, a day later. I started to recall these things. They started flooding back to me. I could recall the abuse my mother gave to this relative. I could recall my relative running away once, only to be caught, locked in a room, and abused. There was a time when my mother was abusing my relative and I begged her to stop because I couldn't endure hearing the screams any longer. She then made my relative apologise to me like a dog for "saving her". I recall lots of it and it has absolutely broken me. I am waking up in the middle of the night just remembering these things and, yet, not one of them happened to me directly.
I don't know what to do? I want to confront my mother but her mental and emotional state may lead her to do something stupid to herself. I want to tell my relative I remember but I don't know. I want to tell other family members but they are--to be honest--highly reactive, judgemental individuals.
I don't know what I am asking for. I am seeking advice from someone...I am devastated.