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Forums / Relationship and family issues / Feeling blindsighted by someone I felt I could trust

Topic: Feeling blindsighted by someone I felt I could trust

3 posts, 0 answered
  1. gloria10
    gloria10 avatar
    131 posts
    21 August 2021

    I wasn't sure where to put this post as it falls in both anxiety and relationships, but it's a professional relationship.

    I've recently signed up to volunteer and I was looking forward to starting. It was a long process, but I stuck it out as I liked the company, it was local and it was in line with what I wanted to do for work (I thought it would be a good experience).

    The person who dealt with the recruiting process made things difficult from early on. They took forever to respond and didn't explain certain steps until I was in the meeting, rather than being upfront. When we did meet they made it sound like they could help me get a job there. The duties also sounded interesting and like there would be a bit of variety.

    When I started, I realised they didn't really have a say in the hiring process and that unless advertised, jobs wouldn't be available. I feel like they lied to me in order to get me into the volunteering position, as they haven't got many, but I would have rather they were honest. I don't mind doing simple tasks, but I felt like there was more on offer during the initial stages that made me interested in the volunteer role.

    I guess the biggest thing for me was that this person came across as quite trustworthy and they were building a rapport as well, I think I'm just surprised it turned around quickly and I'm now doing something mundane.

    Any advice on how to deal with this? I still think volunteering will be good as the staff seemed nice, but my trust is broken.

  2. HappyHelper88
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    HappyHelper88 avatar
    108 posts
    23 August 2021 in reply to gloria10

    Hi there Gloria10

    Thanks so much for sharing how u feel. I completely understand how u feel and why you feel that way, you feel as though you have been decieved by someone which is not a nice experience or feeling. Its not always helpful to keep feelings to yourself as they can bottle up and cause different feelings and emotions. Do you think you would benefit from having a conversation with this person about how you feel? You never know how they may respond but atleast you will have answers to the questions that you have been wondering and you can get it of your chest. As it is a professional relationship you may need to be careful the way you go about this

    Remember there is always support here for you if you need, i hope this helps

  3. gloria10
    gloria10 avatar
    131 posts
    23 August 2021 in reply to HappyHelper88

    Thanks for your help. I have spoken with someone about it and it helped. You’re right, being a professional situation I need to be mindful, I don’t think talking to them will help in this case though.

    I was just disappointed ad I put in a lot of effort towards it, and it was a let down.

    At least I have learned to trust my instincts as something felt off from the get go.

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