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Forums / Sexuality and gender identity / It's a dogs life

Topic: It's a dogs life

9 posts, 0 answered
  1. Scotty2013
    Scotty2013 avatar
    117 posts
    22 July 2013
    This is not about a mental crash from living in the fast lane. Right now I don’t really trust anybody yet I feel  emotionally needy, I will meet a guy now online and expect he will love me and will I get hurt i hate it!!!!. But I’ve become a master at masking my feelings,  I am sick of it and wearing my heart on my sleeve, perhaps I should I do the opposite?....  I don’t think I am capable of a happy, fully satisfying life. My anger and resentment knows no bounds. If i try to talk about it with a health care professional I am never completely honest what's the point?, they will just view me as the stereotypical screwed up gay. Thanks  Rant over TC.
  2. The Real David Charles
    The Real David Charles avatar
    1014 posts
    23 July 2013 in reply to Scotty2013

    Dear Scotty,

    Communication.    That's the only point of a health "professional".   Take it or leave it.   Do you think the health "professional" is honest ?   [cue scary music].

    As the inventor of the wonder therapy "burnt pav" you definately have capabilities far beyond most of us.    Your over thinking comment on the NEED OPTIONS thread by Pandora's Paradox seems to apply to yourself when hyper anxious.   I don't mean to sound simplistic but you have some great qualities and, as I've known you for 18 months at least, I'd say you are a good guy.  Or even a good gay guy.

    Someone mentioned the other day that "guilt" is the biggest emotional downer.  And with "guilt" comes "punishment" otherwise you wouldn't feel so bad as you know the consequence.    Mumbo jumbo, maybe, but getting hurt in relationships is a good thing in the scheme of showing your loved some so much that you became incredibly self aware and vulnerable.  But, obviously, a bad thing if your reality is tested and everything goes pear shape.  Where's the balance ?  Love is cruel ?

    You've been through stages when you couldn't even leave the house and now, here you are, shacking up with internet gay lovers and living moments of happiness.   And, in true "burnt pav" humour fashion, you can always turn your jumper or jacket inside out so that your heart can be both masked and then worn proudly.  I'd be interested to know if the concept of a reversible jacket was fathomed by someone with bipolar or schizophrenia.  Lol.

    So what if you are "the stereotypical screwed up gay" ?   Why hold back ?   Remember those times when responders would write back to you with   "Dear TC" because they didn't realise it meant "Take Care" ?  Funny, hey ?  They actually thought it was your name !  Ha ! The old psychology of projecting your own thoughts maybe means that all this venting,etc, is just another way of saying to yourself "Take Care".     But if you're not open who can come into your life and share the "burnt pav" ?  I'll have a large bowl. 

    "Burnt pav" might help me with all the "let's make out" night time stuff that is interrupted by "important mobile calls" (11pm ?).  Have we really reached the point in society where too much contact (by phone) can kill any real physical contact in the bedroom ?    This is the problem with having elderly in laws who are dying and needing emergency hospital trips at 2am.  In the end the phone is left on for emergencies and sex has to be slotted in, so to speak.  

    Maybe once a week we should put our mobiles and computers down the toilet.  Sorry, bit of a tangent, but we have been obtuse before.  Just not sexually.

    Adios, David.

  3. Scotty2013
    Scotty2013 avatar
    117 posts
    23 July 2013 in reply to The Real David Charles
    Dear David, hehe you always hit the nail on the head, you always manged to give me a laugh, I'm glad your doing ok.. how is the big band?. I see the moderators cat is  still about :)  Yep I'm of to buy that new Jacket tomorrow sounds good a reversible Jacket. Nothing like the peace from stopping an over thinking mind..These are delicate matters though, and i wish didn't need so much thought..TC .......Take Care My Friend.
  4. Mr J
    Mr J avatar
    14 posts
    29 July 2013 in reply to Scotty2013

    I don't have much to give on this.

    I find it humbling that other people in this world have the same feelings and thoughts. problems and trials, no matter the age, sex or orientation. 

    Chin up buddy. Life is so cool and you're openly happy about who you are and i think that's pretty amazing in itself.

  5. geoff
    Life Member
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    geoff avatar
    15594 posts
    30 July 2013 in reply to Scotty2013

    dear Scotty, good on David Charles to raise a sense of humour, he has that knack and his memory is spot on, but more importantly he has made you smile, that's a bonus as always.

    Have you thought the other way around, whether the guy that you meet maybe as nervous as hell and he would be hoping that he doesn't upset yourself.

    These feelings go both ways, remember putting your hand over your mouth and breathing into it just to see if you have bad breath, well he's going to do the same.

    From your previous replies and the burnt pav which must be getting mouldy by now, you should have no trouble finding a guy that loves you.

    I will need to get two jackets so they can be sewed together so they can fit me. Geoff.

  6. The Real David Charles
    The Real David Charles avatar
    1014 posts
    30 July 2013 in reply to geoff

    Dear Geoff, Scotty, Mr J & the Moderators Cat,

    I've been giving this a lot of thought as Scotty has communicated twixt thread and response with me for at least 18 months and Geoff is the venetian blind, i.e part of the furniture.

    There is one solution but it's a bit silly.   Get a full length mirror and when there are social occasions stash it in the car.   If no suitable partner shows up then grab the mirror from the car park and set it up opposite you on the other side of the table.   The hours of fun and witty conversation you can have with your doppleganger will be endless plus it's  cheap date and if you get a bit tipsy the mirror can reveal all in the morning.

    Maybe not such a good idea on a full moon (which can be taken either way and I am beng subtle here).

    Adios, David.

  7. Scotty2013
    Scotty2013 avatar
    117 posts
    31 July 2013 in reply to Mr J
    Thanks Mr J one can only be themselves right? makes life easier "Sometimes" TC
  8. Scotty2013
    Scotty2013 avatar
    117 posts
    31 July 2013 in reply to geoff
    Hi Geoff thanks makes good sense, others feel that same way, although it's a little complicated so i might let the dust settle for a bit. David lol@mirror may just work to..I put that in the list with the jacket :) TC
  9. Scotty2013
    Scotty2013 avatar
    117 posts
    3 August 2013 in reply to The Real David Charles
    Hi David I think i will stick to burnt Pav easier, the guy was a jerk!!! Next time i will go with my gut! .... Next!.................. TC

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