Perhaps you could look for some sort of support group, like the 'Grow' fellowship? ....... here's a link to the information page is below:
I know that for some it is much easier to enrich your life and recovery when connected with other like-minded people. I know that for me, if it wasn't for 12-step fellowships like AA, I would certainly not be where I am today. Otherwise, you could maybe check out your local community centre to see if they have or run some sort of weekly support group you could link in with.....
Remember, it's normal for things to ebb and flow in life, so try not to be too hard on yourself when you are having a down day. Just try not to unpack and 'live permanently' in the down times. Remember, everything passes; the good, the bad and the ugly!
And another sugggestion; replace those thoughts of "I will never get better" with thoughts of "I'm getting better every day. Every day that I take my meds and reach out to someone else (online or face-to-face), and do caring things for myself, is another step toward learning to controm my condition, rather than my condition controlling me."
ONE DAY AT A TIME is all it takes, and all that any one of us needs. You don't have to fix your whole life problem by the week's end. Give yourself time. And check in here every day or week of you want to. We're here for you. xo