Hi I rang another Lawyer for some extra advice he said legal aid must be reported to the IBAC for misuse of money amd funding someone who is clearly playing games using the system whoever they are he said after 4 intervention orders it should have been red-flagged i told him this has been going on for over 12 months he couldn't believe it, the only reason I am strong is my two friends who committed suicide I keep thinking of them as there were no warning signs at all they were happy as anything when I talked to them last next thing they were gone. I am about 7 out of 10 but trying to fight it and stay strong anxiety is 24/7 we just want it to end so I can get a job and be back like a normal family like it used to be my wifes foot is better not a 100% but better than it was.

Hello Dear Farmer...

You have and are going through so much wrong done to you..I have followed your journey since you first posted...

Farmer...the new lawyer who you rang for advice..seems to be able to see through this young girl and that she is abusing the legal aid system...I hope that either you or the new lawyer do report what’s going on...

Farmer....Please..continue to hold on..and stay strong...for you, your wife, your 2 beautiful friends and your family and friends....What this girl is doing is so wrong...and I’m certain that courts will see through her lies....

I am pleased to hear your wife’s foot is better now...

Farmer...anxiety can take over our day to days lives...I can understand anxiety so well...it’s been my constant shadow now for many years...I’m sorry your also struggling with that so much....Is it possible for you to sit outside on your veranda or under a tree...(I love trees)...and try some mindfulness practise...looking at the things around you...hearing the sounds of nature..smelling the freshness of the autumn air...touching the grass around you...while sipping on a beverage of your liking.....I know it doesn’t take anxiety away for ever...but while practicing mindfulness it gives our overactive mind and tensed up body a little bit of relief, so we can gain some extra strength....

Sitting with you lovely Farmer, holding on to you with my care and friendship....

Grandy...

Hey good man Farmer 🌿

Some good bits of news there I'm pleased you got extra advice and fully agree with dear Grandy that this needs reporting. Excellent you have info on where to report this insanity to. I'm hopeful that might be the beginning to a growing spark of light to end this rot. Completely understanding you all want and certainly need this rubbish and vindictive treatment to be over.

I have no idea how it works but maybe a question to your lawyer is there any way of even getting part compensation for the bucket loads of money you've out laid. May not be possible but worth an ask. Innocent people being accused of lies and the mh pain and disruption being so devastating if not there should be some thing in place.

I admire your honour and respect to your dear friends standing strong and holding it together with those poor souls leaving under such sad wrong circumstances. I've said before I'd think you're helping many people speaking openly and honestly as you do. Heartbreaking.

Fab news about your wifes foot. I imagine in the area of farm life and home hopings back to normal or close to.

As always great suggestions from our lovely Grandy. It really does help the head having a change of scenery and observation of the beauty in the outdoors that I imagine you'd have appreciation of living on the land. My partner and I two days running did exactly that. It was a great lift. Feeling the wind blow on your face through the hair, we need any escape regardless of how small. Anxiety it's terrible.

7 out of 10's mighty. If you don't mind me repeating about deep breathing too. It does help with tension which doesn't allow oxygen to get enough to our bodies and brain. Also by focusing on breathing only is a good help disrupting the depressive thoughts and feelings.

I've often wondered what sort of animals you have if you feel like talking about them ok if not ☺

Just had a lovely thought that you might get pleasure from is I imagine you have a beautiful spread of stars on a good night. Something magical about seeing the vast beauty of the universe at night. It's helped me at times no end. Something so tranquil and peaceful. Calming.

As always Farmer and family you're never alone here matey and in real life. You have much love around you and friends here and in your home life. Hold onto that Mr Farner and keep fighting the good fight 👊

🌿

Thank you everyone I honestly don’t know what I would do if I never had anyone to talk too it’s hard enough now,I often look up at the millions of stars and pray for this nightmare to be over I told the lawyer I got advice from that I lost my job of 21 years he said has she gone that far, I said must have, he gave us a few names to email and tell them re legal aid so my daughter will do that she’s good with computers. on the farm we have 300 sheep poll Dorset, geese chooks ducks two dogs, a huge veggie garden we cut grass hay every year for people with horses we even give hay away to people who are struggling to buy feed for there livestock,I help people when I can I teach people if they don’t know how to do something I will show them, I really liked my job only to be made redundant,I just seem to be struggling with everyday life now it’s like I don’t care anymore, she knows the system she knows her lawyer is free and she knows she can tell her lawyer anything and she will believe it, it doesn’t worry the lawyer she still gets paid so she will keep turning up at court even though she probably knows it’s not right. thank you everyone for commenting it’s much appreciated

Hey Farmer Grandy and everyone ☺

I'm glad it's helping being able to talk. It's a release not of all stress but at least taking some of the load off.

Just jumping in to let you know I've read your last post and am coming back. Same goes anytime if I don't reply I'll be back.
You're stuck with me matey 😄

Rainy here I always think it must be the same everywhere. I guess its good for you on the farm for the lawns and veg garden sounds amazing.

Should be back later (bbl) today ☺

Catch you then 🌿

Hi We spoke to the lady that lost her husband due to false allegations which were proven to be false, she said there is no law in place for the person who made false allegations against her husband you have to prove he did it because of the allegations that’s so wrong they were a happy family she said the law sucks the world will be dominated by teenagers because they know the system looks after them, sorry if I talk to much I wish it was like the old days where children treated people with respect my mother when she was alive said treat your elders with respect and that’s exactly what we did. I need to keep my mind off it all the time it’s wrecking me

Mr Farmer hey matey and readers ☺

I nearly made it back yesterday it's late so just a quicky for now.

First up budz don't feel you're talking too much. Not at all this is what here's about. A safe place for people to talk without judgement.
I like that you're talking more so we know where you're at and that you're getting some release.

I was thinking tonight now this would take some practice but worth a try.
Thinkings what hurts about the situation tho it'd be so much easier not to solutions would be harder to find including getting support and help.

Wondering if you could work at allowing thinking time for certain periods of the day.
Possibly some time in the morning because that's the time we're clearest in the mind. If we get sleep it's our strongest time.

When thoughts barge through in the other times gently breathe deep a few times allowing calm then tell yourself I'll think about that later.
Then refocus on the task at hand.

If you can give yourself some time through the day I know you'd be busy to work on you time.
You might like to do with your family or alone that's your call

You might like to talk to your dear Mum Farmer

Maybe play the guitar.

Walk

Take pen to paper

Paint.

Wouldn't matter if its not a masterpiece. Scribbling or painting can be a powerful stress release.
Just let the pen/brush lead the way.

I'm so glad you look at the stars and pray. They give us a spectacular show don't they.

See you sometime soon good man

Thoughts and care Farmer and family 🌿

Thank you I got paid out from work but never seen any of it had to go to our lawyer but that’s ok at least I don’t have to sell anymore stuff for a while, hopefully i will find another job I told my lawyer why didn’t the organisation tell us in training all this could happen false allegations ect ect he said no one would foster care if they did which is true we wouldn’t of we had no support from the organisation in the ten years at least if it was told in training people could prepare themselves if anything did happen,I just need to get my mind right,after losing my job that I actually liked it’s been so hard she is mentally not right to go that far I will keep struggling along thank you

Hi Farmer I haven't forgotten you 🙂

I'll bbl (be back later) sometime just wanted you to know I've read your last post. Up to date.

Pretty full on here at home getting sorted to move.

Eyes are falling out of my head. I'll just stick em in my handbag and boogie off to bed matey.

Remember talk anytime ok. 👋 cya 🌿

Farmer good man hi to readers 👋

Heya what a shame you didn't see any of the payout although one positive that we need to focus on as much as possible in these rotten times is I imagine it'd be even a small load off paying some to your lawyer.
Really good not needing to sell for a while. It's not fair matey at all.

From the small chunks I hear at times you included the law has a long way to go towards protecting the victims.
So much added stress on already insane dealings.

You have a strong sense of survival Farmer man you've pulled up enough to get through and up each morning. Kudos fella that takes the strength of an Ox.

I love hearing you say you'll look for another job. I really hope some light comes in to take the financial pressure off.
You're doing right by yourself trying when you start looking which opens opportunity. Oh yeah it'll take time healing from the job loss. It bites. Let's hope there's something around the corner. Often one door clises another opens.

I'm unsure when to mention this.
Just something to consider and possibly you may not understandably want to pursue and of course now wouldn't be at all the time to if you do chose to.

Was wondering if down the track when the dust settles if you think you'd be wanting to do maybe not a class action if that's the terminology or a group action to work towards changing the laws to have support in place for foster families. Pro bono would be the best scenario of course.
There'splenty of proof it's needed and certainly sounds like a case that needs desparate attention.
If you're interested to support that someone else might lead it if not you.
Often I'd think, things don't get changed until challenged.
Anyway I know nows what needs your full attention.

Does the items you've sold affect the daily running of the farm? As in making more work for youse.Hope not but suspect yes.

As always hoping on hope you're able to at least have some lighter moments in your day that give you a break in thoughts and reason to smile.

Always support Mr Farmer man and to your family too.

See you later 😊⚘ an everlasting Rose for your wife and daughter.

Take care 🌿

thank you Demonblaster, i appreciate all your replies, yes i will be standing up to make it law that all this is told in training not what could happen its what does happen not hidden from Foster carers the true facts, if the organization want foster carers they need to tell the truth and stop hiding it, we are just one of dozens of cases where foster carers have been stitched up i have spoken to people who had allegations made against them they said if they were told that in training no way in hell would they of started foster caring, the lady that lost her husband said she was abandoned by the organization as soon as the allegations were made, exactly the same as us the organization doesn't want to know you they don't care how long you were a foster carer all they want is baby sitters for children so they can continue making money, Then you have Legal Aid who know quite well someone with 11 intervention orders is playing the system but they continue to fund it biggest waste of money i have ever seen.everyday is a struggle for me but i keep it hidden from my family i dont want to put anymore stress on them its bad enough.i just want this to be over its wearing me down fast. Thank you everyone

Hi Farmer thanks you're welcome 🙂

I read your post and will be back matey.

Not sure when. If you like keep talking Farmer we're listening.

Hope some good things going on amongst it all.

Oh so glad you're going to go further with it all.

See you later 🌿

Hi Mr Farmer I'd ask how you're going but sadly I know the amswer.

I've said it before and mean it matey I and I'd imagine many others too admire your strength to keep going with such frustration and deep pain to deal with.
So many emotions would be circling yet you push through.

I get you wanting not to put more stress on your loving family. It's good of you and considerate.
I'm concerned though it could be to your detriment being an extra load you're carrying taking their stress on top of yours.
A thought which of course is entirely your call is to talk to them about how you're feeling because you need as much support as possible. They might feel they can help you more by knowing.
This could lighten your load. Being in this together it could open the family to discussion. They might be feeling same.

You'll always have here of course. A shame it's not the same as real life (real life)

Fantastic you're planning to initiate the urgent need to close the ridiculous totally unfair gap in the law.
We have a long way to go with law in many areas unfortunately. Fortunately though there's people like you who are prepared to do the yards to contribute towards making change.

Another add I feel although may not happen is compensation for victims for their cruel verbals against innocent people. Isn't that along the lines of slander. I think that's high court but in the same vane.

Sounds like you're in touch with a few who also might know of a few people that have been/going through same.
It'd be a long process I'd think but a worthy one that so many people could benefit from by avoiding this grief and others like your friends wife could see some form of justice.
I'm so glad but didn't want to say before this also could be in honour of your friend his and other families.

It potentially tho hard might help getting it all out mentally. As in unload a deal of your anguish and pain after this nightmare settles opposed to having to deal alone in the aftermath of it all.

Farmer hold on budz.
Remember if thoughts come through don't think any further on them.
Then think about a better future good man. You certainly deserve it and your family. ⚘

🌿

Hi Thank you once again it is a hard road and the thoughts do keep coming back I try and block them I know this sounds silly but I keep thinking the fastest way to die but I try and block it out, i feel anxiety all the time. i have been married 36 years and not once have we argued but now we seem to argue over nothing i know its just me,i need to stop it it's hard to sleep of a night I am just stressing way too much, i need to stay positive block all bad thoughts out of my head if i end it whos the winner she is , she will move on to someone else and make their life hell on earth.i was told any allegations and lies by a foster child the organisation has nothing to do with you again because they don't want their business tarnished because that's all it is, we were also told we were entitled to legal aid but another organization i won't mention got it stopped that's why we couldn't get it you don't realize how bad some organizations are until you have to deal with them, oh well i will keep as strong as possible and see what happens.

Hi Farmer680,

We are sorry to hear that you continue to struggle with this difficult and painful situation and these dark thoughts. We can hear how overwhelming this situation is and that the stress of it is affecting your marriage. We would again strongly urge you to seek professional help as it is really important that you take immediate steps to keep yourself safe. We are getting in touch with you privately to offer some extra support.

We hear that you have found the strength to manage these dark thoughts so far and we hope that you continue to be able to do so. We would urge that you get some professional support to lighten this burden. You don't have to do this alone.

Remember that in overwhelming moments you get in touch with our friends at Lifeline (13 11 14) or the Suicide Call Back Service (1300 659 467).

Feel free to keep the community updated on how you are going with everything.

Dear Rarmer man 🌿

A very caring post from our good lady Sophie.
I feel too matey that as Sophie suggested the best thing to get through is getting onto some professional help.
To do that if you see your GP they can get the ball rolling.

Sleep deprivation which is no wonder with the burden you're carrying you poor man totally adds and creates more stress that you certainly don't need.
Could you get something to help you sleep and to ease the anxiety and depression from your GP.
You need to give yourself every chance to get through this.

Sadly matey I get why you're feeling that way and know exactly what you're talking about with the thoughts.
It's frightening being so low.
It seems like there's no options but there is Farmer. It doesn't seem like it but you do have the strength to pull back up and yes please keep at dismissing the thoughts.
Also if you can draw on that energy to reinforce why it's not an option.

Your family love and need you.

Friends

Your friend and many more taking their lives.
No Mr Farmer not that way.
It'd totally destroy I'd say many people who care and love you.

Us here. We want you to get through and have your life again.

I have no doubt there'd be people going through this as well following your story.

You later hope to try to get much needed change to the system

No! She can't win. She's taken enough from you all.

It can't get much worse than how you're feeling so that I feel means the future holds better for you.
I know it'd be near impossible to see that at the moment but there has to be better than this.

I might know what organisation and yes it's very disturbing.

Talk when you need to here good man.
We're listening and do care 🙂

🌿

Thank you it’s been horrible we have court again on Monday the police did say they won’t be representing her anymore but she told her lawyer she wants to keep going with it it’s never going to end it could go on for years I have been arguing at home for no reason it’s the worst time of my life and my families life why are the good people worse off it’s seems the bad people are better off they get everything for free lawyers they get paid not to work ect and the ones like us who work around the clock get no hand outs we just want her to go away and never come near us again I am so nervous I have never done a thing wrong in my life been driving 39 years still have full points on my license, never had a parking ticket either so all this is big for us when that evil person has destroyed us she will move to the next poor family someone has to put a stop to her ASAP sorry it’s getting bad for me I will try my hardest to stay strong I promise

Hey dear msn 😊

You poor guy going through so much. I feel deeply sorry for you're horrid situation it's just so unfair!

I'll be back over the w/e matey it's late and have a funeral tomorrow for a very good friend.

Will always when I'm able be back ☺

Ok matey remember anytime you want to talk

Catch you later dear Farmer 🌿

Thank you we have court on Monday just a night mare the dark thoughts are trying to come back I need to try and stop them when will end anxiety is so bad how can one person do this I pray to GOD it will be over on Monday this can’t go on anymore

Hey Farmer680,

We're so sorry that you've been feeling anxious and still struggling with dark thoughts. It sounds like this whole process must be really draining for you, and please know that our supportive community are always here to offer their kind words of advice and support. We'd also encourage you to reach out if these feelings become overwhelming, or if you'd like to talk things through before court on Monday. Our understanding counsellors at our Support Service are available 24/7 on 1300 22 4636, as well as our friends at Lifeline on 13 11 14. You never have to go through this alone, or keep these feelings bottled up inside. 

We hope you continue to update your friends here on the forums on how you're going, whenever you feel ready to. 

Thank you will see what happens tomorrow in court day the dark thoughts are trying to overtake badly

Hi Farmer680,

We're so sorry that the dark thoughts are overwhelming today. It's really important to reach out some support in order to take care of yourself and keep yourself safe at this time.

We'd strongly urge you to reach out for some support today as we know what a stressful time this is for you. Our friends at Lifeline are available 24/7 on 13 11 14. You never have to go through this alone.

Thanks for reaching out here today. We hope that this community is of some comfort to you in this difficult time.

Dear Farmer man 🌿

It's incredibly unfair and terrible the nightmare you're and your families going through.
My heart truly goes out to you and the many others following and supporting you too.

I understand without being in your situation how the emotions must be in such turmoil and that it's it's dragging on an on. It's such a strain on anyone going through this horrific ordeal.
Being closer to Monday I imagine they're in overdrive.

Farmer I urge you please follow Sophies solid advice.
I believe you could greatly benefit from professional advice and help especially so close till court.

Matey you've resisted the temptation before which sadly seems your only choice to be free of the dark anguish. You can again!

It's imperative to not allow your mind to have this an option. Dismiss the thought immediately.
Then remind yourself of reasons to live.

There are people in your life that need you and above all love you as you do them.
This little vixen absolutely can't win! She's taken way too much from you and yours.
Your lifes valuable.

How you feel about your friends taking their lives would be the same for your family and friends including us here. That's not your way. I know you wouldn't want to put that on anyone else for the rest of their lives. You love them too much.

You deserve your good life back.

What would you say to someone else if they were in your shoes.
This I say because it can help put a different perspective on how you're feeling at the moment.

You must believe this because it's true Farmer man you ARE stronger than this. You've proven that.
Your strength it's buried under this turmoil but it's still there. It is. It's in us to pull it back up.

The first step my friend you can trust I do know this is to not accept suicide as an option!
People need you and love you for the good man you are.

I'll be thinking of you Mr Farmer I do anyway.
Wishing you to be free of this nightmare.
The very best for Monday dear man.

Talk anytime we're listening and do care ☺

Thank you everyone my mind is running a million mile an hour at the moment the one living with us had to go see the investigation lady on Friday and the investigation lady said iam forming a big negative opinion of your sister everything she has said can’t be proven and the one living with us said because none of it’s true will have to wait until tomorrow to see what happens sorry will wait and see it’s going to be a day from hell

Best of luck Farmer man 🌿 and family ⚘

Dear Farmer..

Just popping in and like our Beautiful Deebi....want to wish you all the luck that I have to give you....

Thinking of you and your family...

Hi we never had to appear in court because of COVID we haven’t heard anything from the lawyer yet he went to court, I don’t know how long I can keep a brave front up for, it’s destroyed me lack of sleep, anxiety it’s never going to stop at the moment I feel bad so will wait to see what the lawyer says, sorry it’s the way I feel I feel so low I need GOD to pick me up

Hey there Mr Farmer 🌿 dear Grandy and everyone 👋

Thinking of you Farmer. It's so hard having to wait isn't it. You just want to know what the score is aye. It's a wonder your lawyer hasn't contacted you. Hoping he has by now.

Hope it went smoothly with the home daughter on Friday.

Yip you really are doing amazingly well holding up good man. I'm so pleased you are.

Always listening and will always be back when I can.

Best wishes for peace and freedom of this rot. Best to your family too.

🌿

Hi everyone it went to court again my lawyer contacted us and said good news the Judge has agreed to withdraw all Applications against me and my wife, and I started a new job been there 3 days it’s in the same hospital I worked 21 years at but a different department thank you everyone I have appreciated all your encouragement you hear about suicide but really how many people take notice of it unless it comes to there door I can tell you it’s so scary your mind is going a million mile an hour thinking things the dark thoughts are so over whelming.

Hello Dear Farmer...

That is the best news ever...I am so very proud of you for holding on too what was such a hard journey for you to travel...

Congratulations dear man..,,on both your good news...I hope things continue to keep going on the up for you...and you excel at your new job....which I know you will...

Kind thoughts...and please keep us updated on how your travelling..,,

Grandy..