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Forums / Supporting family and friends with a mental health condition (carers) / HOW TO HELP MY SISTER - DEPRESSION AND ANXIETY


3 posts, 0 answered
  1. Michelle1991
    Michelle1991 avatar
    3 posts
    12 June 2018

    Hi all,

    Thanks for taking the time to read this post.

    My sister has recently been diagnosed with depression & anxiety (we have known this for a long time however). I am just after some tips on how I can best help her. She isn't a really open person and it is hard to try to have a conversation about how she is feeling usually.

    Any tips or advice from your personal experiences would be greatly appreciated.

    Thank you.

  2. Croix
    Community Champion
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    Croix avatar
    10561 posts
    12 June 2018 in reply to Michelle1991

    Dear Michelle1991~

    Trying to support someone with depression and anxiety is not easy. My partner had to do this when I've been overwhelmed and there is no road-map, more a matter of trial and error.

    Often I've not wanted to talk and been angry if people - even ones I loved - pressed too much. Other times I've wanted to say what was happening to me. No consistency I'm afraid.

    The two most important things I can think of are firstly to encourage your sister to seek medical help and then to keep up with it. By the sound of it this may already be happening.

    The second thing is simply to ensure she knows you will always be there for her when needed and you care -it's that simple. I'm not talking just about 'serious talks' but generally, go to movies, give her a lift to the doctors if she can't make it, whatever ... You let her know you won't judge, even if she is angry and maybe even hurtful. Just move away til it gets better.

    I guess asking you sister what she would like you to do in future would be good, though she may not be certain or change her mind.

    Listening is good, asking how she is all the time is not. You also need to get over any urge to make things better or fix them. Normally you can't anyway, just be a calm reassuring presence. Making suggestion can often be annoying, particularly if they seem impractical or show a lack of understanding.

    As you can see it is a mixed - and probably confusing - situation. So like my partner trial and error is all you can do. Also realize it is OK to make mistakes. If something dose not work or even worse backfires and makes things worse just bear that in mind for the future.

    Always feel free to come here and ask questions, and say how you are feeling too. This is a stressful time for you and so you need support too. Not be all on your own. Is there anyone there for you?


    2 people found this helpful
  3. Michelle1991
    Michelle1991 avatar
    3 posts
    12 June 2018 in reply to Croix

    Thank you so much Croix for your insight - I really appreciate you taking them time to help me understand!

    Wishing you all the best!

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