Hi guys,
I've joined this site to get some insights/advice from people who have been in my situation o n both sides of the coin. I'm 34 and have been married for 18 months and been with my husband for 2.5 years. We have a 9 month old daughter. We're both from the UK so have no close family to reply on.
My husband suffers from depression which up until now I have been able to deal with. Now we have a child I am finding it harder and harder to keep it together and put up with a husband that has seemingly checked out of the life we are creating. He has no enthusiasm or motivation to do anything. Isn't interested in me sexually let alone holding a decent conversation. I've noticed that lately he has taken a turn for the worse. He's not been himself for a while now and it's causinhg me to be miserable.
I try to make things as nice and happy as I can at home and take on the load, he works late and gets stressed with work, ends up not seeing our child at all and falls asleep on the couch. He is also always tired and I've given up suggesting going to bed early and not falling asleep on the couch.
I know he is struggling as he told me but I am too and I've reached my limit. I've had enough. I'm feeling crap myself, and like I'm doing everything for the family.
My husband has been medicated before I knew him but came off them as he said they made him 'numb'. He's also spoken to someone a long time ago but again says it was a waste of time and money.
I have suggested speaking to someone about it but he's not interested. He said that with exercise and sleep he'll be good again. I know these things will help but they wont address the underlying issue.
We do the same dance every 6-9 months and I've had enough of it. I'm willing to go to counselling but he just wont.
I'm rambling and if you've made it this far well done to you!
I just really need some advice on how to deal with this as I feel my health is being compromised and I cannot allow that to happen, especially now I have my child to think about.
I'm seeing a counsellor next week (alone). If anything at least I can get some coping strategies, but to be honest, if things don't improve then I will leave and I have told him this.
Thanks for any advice x