My partner of 10 years has been suffering from depression and anxiety for a while now. He started treatment about 4 months ago. He is an alcoholic in denial and uses drinking to self medicate as well as the medication he has been prescribed.
We don’t live together and over the past few weeks he has ignored the majority of my messages and texts. I’ve seen him twice in 3 weeks where we would usually see each other most days. 4 days ago he told me he would call after work and never did. I found out he was at the pub with some friends. I also found out that night that he had told another woman that he loves her. I messaged him about it and he denied it.
The next day I asked him to call me to discuss and he told me that he was trying to sleep and that he had been arrested and fired from his job that day. He refused to say anymore so I called his mum who told me that he had had a bit of a meltdown the night before, had never come home and they had found him drunk on the school oval where he works.
Since then he has told me that he needs space and that he can’t deal with any arguments right now. I have not heard from him since.
I want to know what I should do? I know that he is suffering and I want to support him. At the same time I am suffering too, I can’t eat or sleep obsessing about what has happened with this other woman and what is going on with him and what is going to happen with us.
i just wish that he would have a discussion with me so that if the relationship is over I know and can grieve. At the moment I have just had days of radio silence, I have no idea what is going on and I feel like I’m in limbo.
I worry that he will just never contact me again. I don’t know how to cope.