Thanks for your response Tony, I appreciate how much you opened up about your experiences, and your perspective on what recovery can look like, especially that it is an ongoing journey.
I do need to remember that there may be changes that one day make a permanent improvement in him, and I do hope that can happen for him. I do think I needed the reminder, or reinforcement, that my role is a support one. So, I can't actually make those diagnosis changes, medication changes, etc, I can't speed up time, or control his emotions, or his reactions, or his motivation to do things. All of that is not within my power, & that's kind of what I'm really trying to learn right now. When I think that I can be a superhero and that I need to become Carer with a capital C and take that on as a living-breathing persona, I just get burned right out, and he ends up feeling alone because I'm not really listening if I'm just "fixing".
Anyway, I probably went off on a tangent there. To respond to your point about big life changes, I am totally open, and I think he knows that. We have recently moved from the city to a suburban-rural town. Re workplace or career, he doesn't have either and has been chronically unemployed for years, so, yeah, that's a really difficult one. But I recognise your sentiment that maybe big shifts will help. If he ever comes to me with one I'll consider it 100%.