Hi there. This, my first post, is going to be my first step towards a happier future. This thread will be like a personal journal. I know it's going to be a game of snakes and ladders but, whenever I come back and read this first post and remember the dark despair of this night, I know I'll have made progress because I've found a safe place to be honest, clear my head, and take comfort from my seemingly small achievements.

Right now, just phoning someone can be a massive achievement; as is brushing my hair; taking the bin out etc. I've got to force myself to do the basics and get through the day without people noticing me struggle.

Just writing this first post is quite an achievement for me. And I'm feeling better for it.

Welcome to the Gabba and well done for writing your first post. Do congratulate for this achievement.

This is a supportive place full of kind friendly people.

You have insight into your behaviour and thoughts and feelings.

This is a safe place and you can use this thread like a journal or ask questions, exchange ideas.

Have a browse through threads here in the social thread where there some ones that encourage you to play game to more serious ones that help you.

I will drop in from time to time say hello and see how you are going.

Quirky

Thanks for the welcome, Quirky.

I had a nightmare day yesterday and I've got a lot to do today. There arebposts I want to make but I'm not sure when I can make them.

Right now the big thing is that I've started. :-)

Gabba

Yes you have started and that is a great thing.

Do you ever try to write down your dreams or is it better to forget them.

Post when ever you have time or want to. No pressure.

I hope you get everything done today that you wanted.

Quirky

Dear Gabba

Congratulations on your first posts and welcome. What a positive statement to make. This, my first post, is going to be my first step towards a happier future.Way to go Gabba.

This is a safe place for you so continue to use it in the way you see best. It is hard and nasty to go through dark times but when you come out the other side and see the sunshine it is a fantastic feeling. I hope you can get there soon. We will support you.

So sorry you had such dark despair last night and I am very happy you got through. Dreams can be such a trigger for almost anything but it's good to remember we do have great dreams. I like to go over my dreams when I remember them and see what I am trying to tell myself. Sometimes there is only a feeling, a sensation when I wake up but no recollection of the content. Not sure if that is good or bad. Have you tried to work out what your dreams are telling you?

It is good insight to recognise that you have achieved anything and that you can, take comfort from my seemingly small achievements. Knowing your achievements may seem small to others but represent a step forward for you is as good as taking that step. Two for the price of one.

May I ask if you have a physical ailment? Combined with anxiety and/or depression it can make life quite difficult. I ask as I had a post viral fatigue and getting through the shower and dressing was a huge effort. Sometimes I needed to go back to bed afterwards for a short time. Of course it made all the other stuff so much more difficult.

Life is a bit like snakes and ladders. I hope you can stay on the ladders and avoid the snakes. I don't have much liking for them at the best of times. It would be lovely to continue chatting with you.

Mary