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Forums / Welcome and orientation / Giving and Receiving Support with Difficult Days

Topic: Giving and Receiving Support with Difficult Days

  1. Guest 05
    Guest 05 avatar
    128 posts
    31 March 2021
    Hello--- like many here on the beyond blue forums, I too am among the millions who suffer from mental health. So just saying Hello.
  2. Ggrand
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Ggrand avatar
    9058 posts
    31 March 2021 in reply to Guest 05

    Hello Dear Malaika,

    A very warm and caring welcome to the forums...

    It’s really nice to meet you...

    I hope these forums are as beneficial to you as it has been for me and so many more here...

    You’re very welcome to share how your feeling and your thoughts anytime you feel up to it..as much or as little as you want to...There is no pressure...

    There are heaps of different thread on the forums, about depression, anxiety, PTSD....and many more topics...that if you feel like it, you can read and if your up to it join in the conversation....

    My kind and caring thoughts...Dear Malaika..

    Grandy..

  3. Matchy69
    Valued Contributor
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Matchy69 avatar
    5830 posts
    31 March 2021 in reply to Guest 05
    Hi Malaika and I to would like to welcome you to the forums.This a great caring environment for people with mental health problems.
    Take care,
    Mark.
  4. missep123
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    missep123 avatar
    845 posts
    31 March 2021 in reply to Guest 05

    Hi Malaika!

    A huge warm welcome to the forums!

    We are a non-judgmental, caring bunch here!

    We look forward to hearing from you!

  5. Guest 05
    Guest 05 avatar
    128 posts
    31 March 2021 in reply to missep123
    Hello to those who have made me feel very welcomed by your kind gentle words contributed by grandy, matchy and missep.Thankyou. Yes I've read so many posts already on the beyond blue forums and can say that I have personally experienced a bit of Everything of what others have written about themselves. I don't know how to write things about myself as I've never done this yet in my life but do know that I wouldn't be on the beyond blue forums if I didnt suffer from mental health. Thankyou for Your kind Welcome.
  6. Matchy69
    Valued Contributor
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Matchy69 avatar
    5830 posts
    31 March 2021 in reply to Guest 05
    Hi Malaika it can be hard and daunting tlat first trying to describe what's going on.I struggled with that all my life with communication and trying to describe what's going on.I just describe it the best way I can.I am finding the more I post about myself more easier it gets.I hope you can tell us more in your words.Maby join in on a thread you feel a connection with.
    Take care,
    Mark.
    1 person found this helpful
  7. Guest 05
    Guest 05 avatar
    128 posts
    31 March 2021 in reply to Matchy69

    Thank you for your post, matchy. I'm a very deep thinker type of a person who seems to have a the ability to help others sort out with their problems in many areas of their lives but unable to help myself when it's my turn. Communication skills I lack miserably in so many areas that I seem to turn people away instead gravitating them towards me. I really don't know what I say or do so wrong that people run away from me as fast and far as they can leaving an dreadful empty void I my life that I'm struggling so hard contend with. It's so much easier to help others but we're often too emotionally blind to see ourselves how others see and hear us. Hope this make sense. Thank you

  8. amberlite
    amberlite avatar
    415 posts
    31 March 2021 in reply to Guest 05
    Hello to everyone and welcome, welcome to new posters. I do like the new image, the natural order seems so much simpler, I do like simple! I'm yet to see you post anything odd, you seem intelligent and if you find helping others easier, then that makes you extra compassionate. You may find people on this forum Get You in ways others can not.
  9. Matchy69
    Valued Contributor
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Matchy69 avatar
    5830 posts
    31 March 2021 in reply to Guest 05
    Hi Malaika I have a great problem talking on person.I have to write down everything before I go to the doctor or wherever.I really struggle explaining my self .On here I can take my time and not feel pressured.Sometimes I write things on here and just delete it as didn't like what I have written and started again.I have been told I am a really good listener and actually listen and know what the person had said and that I care.I think we all express our selves differently as we are all unique .
    Take care,
    Mark.
  10. Guest 05
    Guest 05 avatar
    128 posts
    31 March 2021 in reply to amberlite

    Thank you for the compliment, amberlite. You had written-"you may find people of this forum Get You in ways that others can not". A very interesting statement. It has it's Pros and Cons. It's very important to recognize one's own limitations. Without recognizing, there's can be consequences. Simplicity is the key and paramount in my life. Nice talking with you.:)

    Matchy thank you for sharing. I do the same as you do to by writing things down before seeing a doctor. It really helps without the extra stress and get the much needed things discussed.. It takes me so long to write just one post. I don't know how to keyboard. This allows me to think very carefully before I put it on paper or on my device. That's an excellent quality you have there, matchy being a good listener :) Listening is an art these days. Being a good listener gives you the insight of how people feel and think. I'm very similar and yet not Thank you for posting to me.

  11. Guest 05
    Guest 05 avatar
    128 posts
    31 March 2021 in reply to Guest 05

    Hello grandy. Nice meeting you too. I had read a several of your posts on other threads. You have a very kind nice disposition of expressing yourself to make others feel so cimfortable. I can't seem to open up to anyone of how I truly feel due to severe past hurts throughout my life. Some have been resolved, most haven't as the other parties refuse to make any type of reconciliation. I have so much fear within myself and at a standstill going nowhere thank you for caring with kind regards.

  12. Missing user
    Missing user avatar
    31 March 2021 in reply to Guest 05

    hello there malaika, welcome. i love your profile picture.

    i hope you enjoy the forums and can find some support for yourself.

  13. Guest 05
    Guest 05 avatar
    128 posts
    31 March 2021 in reply to Missing user
    Thank you mb for your lovely words and likewise too hope you'll receive the same. With kind regards
    1 person found this helpful
  14. Missing user
    Missing user avatar
    31 March 2021 in reply to Guest 05
    thank you, i hope you enjoy your time here. i'm usually around often if you'd like to chat here or any thread (no pressure to though).
  15. amberlite
    amberlite avatar
    415 posts
    1 April 2021 in reply to Guest 05
    Darls, there is only- PRO'S- with the people, in these forums getting you, more than the general population does, simply that and nothing more. See we do get you and we will not turn away , our understanding love will always have us, gravitate towards you.
  16. Guest 05
    Guest 05 avatar
    128 posts
    1 April 2021 in reply to amberlite

    Good afternoon amberlite. Thank you for your input I'll put it in the back burner for a while before I disclose more of myself. I've noticed here on the beyond blue forums there are all age groups of people combined. Before joining up I was rather hesitant until I saw a section for older ones. I got the impression the way beyond blue advertised it there were different segments, only to find out that's not the case. I know from my experience in life dealing with all sorts of people from all walks of life, of all age groups there's still so much we all can learn from each other regardless of age difference. There's only so much I can take up on board of helping others at present and that's not being selfish. It's being balanced. As matchy, others too, had suggested in welcoming me to the forums, it was explained in such easy to understand manner I can write as much I or as little I wish. No obligation. it was also suggested perhaps to join onto other threads which I have already do so. Since I've limitations of much I can give of myself, I decided to keep it simple, light hearted until I regain that inner strength once again before I can to go into the deeper tropics in helping others. There are some very sad situations here on the beyond blue forums and many have helped each other in remarkable ways. It's so encouraging to read. Most of us can help others by sharing our own personal experiences in life always hoping there's a positive outcome. Thank you for reading. With kind regards

  17. Croix
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    Croix avatar
    10350 posts
    1 April 2021 in reply to Guest 05

    Dear Malaika ~

    Keeping things simple and light-hearted can be a tonic here on the Forum. In your reading you will have noticed how hard things are for so many. Quite often it is not just wise words, care, or even the experiences of others that always helps.

    A little light - not necessarily connected with their circumstances - can breed a feeling of well being at times when other things are simply too heavy to deal with.

    So by saying as much or as little as you are comfortable with, and simply having a presence, you are doing OK. If you have not already done so can I suggest seek out some of the threads on the social pages and see if there are any you would enjoy

    Croix

  18. Guest 05
    Guest 05 avatar
    128 posts
    3 April 2021 in reply to Croix

    Hello. thankyou Croix for your post. The suggestion given about " keeping it simple and light hearted can be a tonic here on the Forums.

    Food for thought.

    I've ALWAYS kept my life simple as I've already written it several times on my posts to others. Its paramount. It's an absolute MUST for me so when those dark days creep in its much easier to cope without stressing about unnecessary things. It's always been one of my many coping strategies over the years of experience dealing with people. So keeping it simple and lighthearted is a great to enjoy life on a more postive way.

    Was reading your background on the forums in this section. I haven't any of those qualifications as you have yet do know 'how" to deal with people in general within my limitations.

    I suffer from severe anxiety/depression/ptsd/ along with a whole host of other mental health issues. Can to intensify with age and at times comes in the most unexpected ways so having good coping strategies is vital for me.

    I'm still both a student and a teacher. None of is Never stop learning regardless our age. (We're about in the same age groups) Age shouldn't prevent us learning, helping, giving of oneself to others, so others may benefit from any suggestions given.

    What's written above is a brief outline about my mental health introduction.

    Thank you reading. With kind regards.

  19. Croix
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    • Life membership is awarded by beyondblue for providing outstanding peer support to the online community over a period of 3+ years.
    Croix avatar
    10350 posts
    3 April 2021 in reply to Guest 05

    Dear Malaika~

    Thank you for saying more about yourself (I did not think there were many here as distant from their birthdays as myself, so finding a fellow traveler is very pleasing:)

    I do have a thread called "Store your happy memories here"

    https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/staying-well/store-your-happy-memories-here-

    whch is a place people can write down pleasant experiences they have had. I've found this helps others, and also the writers themselves as they are reminded when down how life can be. You might care to have a glance though.

    I've the same diagnosis as yourself and can say the traumas were a long time ago and my condition has overall consistently improved over the years. Not gone, but manageable.

    Qualifications are misleading, I'm a volunteer here just as you are, and came to find more information about coping with my conditions, and you are right, we all learn as we live on. Plus helping others is a two way street, the act helps me too.

    I like your avatar, reminds me of my birthplace. Is also something with very little to do with the mental health theme - a glimpse outside at a different world.

    Croix

  20. missep123
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    missep123 avatar
    845 posts
    4 April 2021 in reply to Guest 05

    Hi Malaika!

    I am so glad to see that many have posted here in support of you! I hope that you have felt welcomed and comfortable here. From your posts I can see that you have a lot of insight (a great thing to see!). As you mentioned you are a deep thinker I think that this will help you process and work on achieving the outcome you want to achieve. We are going to cheer you on every step of the way!

  21. Guest 05
    Guest 05 avatar
    128 posts
    6 April 2021 in reply to missep123

    Hello and thank you missep for your postive post Yes, the response has been overwhelming with many encouraging me to the forums. Thank you for your input too :) It really does help where we can contribute and encourage each other if able. It makes our heavy burdens lighter when shared. Many has similar mental health problems yet each is unique to another. What may work for a few, not necessarily work for another. This is what makes it so interesting for various ones expressing themselves in a more simple way so it's easier to understand for those reading. We're all so different and we all have feelings that's so important to us even it's not important to others. Having a variety of volunteers on the beyond blue forums is so beneficial. Thank you.

    Hello Croix, I did read your link. Very good. Excellent work! As I've already have mentioned in some of my posts, I have limitations of "how much" I can take on board. Yes, we're ALL volunteers here on the beyond blue forums, some can contribute a lot more than others, however, this doesn't discredit those who can't contribute as much as they would like too. It's really good that You and others Can contribute your time to help those in need. That's fantastic. As mentioned I'm still Both a Student and a Teacher so much of my time is keeping up with my studies so I can help those in need. It's important to keep up with my studies so I know what I'm talking about when helping people with their troubles by giving them some positivity in their life. Balance is the key for me. I've been doing this type of voluntary work for well over 50 years. It's so rewarding. At present I'm in the Staying Well area where I feel rather comfortable. It's helping me to control my own anxiety/depression/ptsd. Will disclose a bit more about myself when ready to do so. Thank you too for your encouragement :) Thank you for reading.With kind regards.

    1 person found this helpful
  22. Guest 05
    Guest 05 avatar
    128 posts
    10 April 2021 in reply to Guest 05

    Hello Everyone. Hope you're all doing well. Today I don't feel Dont fit in Anywhere. I feel very down. Got we order as thr night went on. I dont belong anywhere. People can be so insensitive and nasty when I try my very best to be positive with MH issues. There's still so much stigma and discrimination on MH . Those who have a physical health that can be seen always get so much assistance but when it come MH something, it's an illness One don't see, there's very little or no support. People are very quick to criticize or m as ke judgemental remarks as I often can't say it the right way and cine all wrong. Then they think I'm complaining when I'm not. Thtn people tell me off which makes me feel worse. I really hate this anxiety /depression PTSD I suffer with so much. I wish I just hibernate away for a while. No one really cares if I'm around.

  23. Matchy69
    Valued Contributor
    • A special award for members who go above and beyond to support others here on the forums
    • A member of beyondblue's blueVoices community
    Matchy69 avatar
    5830 posts
    10 April 2021 in reply to Guest 05
    Hi Malaika I agree with you about the stigma around mental health.It is still out there and can be hard to get the support that you need.It is a hard subject to bring up with friends and the reactions we get make us wish we hadn't.You safe on here to talk about your mental health .At least we have sites like this.
    Take care,
    Mark.
    1 person found this helpful
  24. missep123
    Community Champion
    • Outstanding members who have volunteered their time to support others here on the forums
    missep123 avatar
    845 posts
    10 April 2021 in reply to Guest 05

    Hi Malaika,

    I'm so sorry to hear that you have been feeling that way today. I agree with you and Matchy69, it is very unfortunate that there is still stigma around mental health. On the other hand I am glad that we have forums such as these that are open and non-judgemental about MH issues. Like you said it can be very challenging because MH is something that often cant be seen externally.

    We definitely care that you are around, please continue to reach out as much as you feel comfortable to do so!

    Do you have anyone around you to reach out to that you are feeling this way?

    1 person found this helpful
  25. amberlite
    amberlite avatar
    415 posts
    10 April 2021 in reply to Guest 05
    Darls, fight the good fight- when the MH is thrown in my face and it does happen, I used the opportunity to show others how strong long term MH patients can be. So, sure have a brake and get strong, but rubbish no one cares!!! Whatever has happened it will pass and you will have learnt something new to add to your skill set. Your smart and you will right your situation.
    1 person found this helpful
  26. Guest 05
    Guest 05 avatar
    128 posts
    11 April 2021 in reply to amberlite

    Hello Matchy, Missep, Amberlite, Croix and All. Thank you for your posts. :) I put a word in for you too it's in the Staying Well. Section - Things Thankful For. Sorry I'm unable to put things into a nutshell of what I'm really going through. I suffer from multiple medical issues for a very long time so after every uncalled for encounter I experience, I'm not as resilient as I used to be so had to cut out lots things in my life so I can function each day reasonably well. Some days I'm in a much brighter mood and can do lots, other days not so good and that's when all my motor skills starts to slow down mainly caused from delayed ptsd depression anxiety. Currently Everything seems to be overlapping, things I've dealt with seemed to have resurfaced. The loss of my papa, mama, my very own blood and flesh is so intense and overwhelming at times. Though they are all gone, now sleeping peacefully. It happened so many years ago yet it seems only yesterday I remember seeing their happy faces, hearing their laughter, showing me things they made at school. Happy memories. They're all gone and I miss them so much. Certain times of the year always gets worse and all those memories just come back. It's like reliving the whole painful event again. Thank you for reading. Take care with kind regards.

  27. amberlite
    amberlite avatar
    415 posts
    11 April 2021 in reply to Guest 05
    Hello to all- grief is difficult and you can take as long as you need to do so, you were lucky to have had nice parents. I hope your situation continues to improve and you right yourself again.
  28. Guest 05
    Guest 05 avatar
    128 posts
    11 April 2021 in reply to amberlite

    Hello and thank you Amberlite for your gentle caring kind words. :) Yes grieving does has it twists and turns and at given moment there's always a memory of my beloved mama and papa who were well into the mid 90,s before their time came. You mentioned.. "you were lucky to have had nice parents" . Wasn't always the case but I try my very best to remember them for all the good things that they have done. If I start dwelling on all the negative things they did, I would never be able to move forward.

    I've never come across a perfect family yet.

    Each family has their own issues ..

    At times things overlap between the good they did and not do good. I need to move forward. That's the only way I can exist. Stay in the present. Thank you for caring. With kind regards.

  29. Guest 05
    Guest 05 avatar
    128 posts
    12 April 2021 in reply to Guest 05
    Good afternoon Everyone. Would some one please help me how to understand how the beyond blue forums works as I'm not sure what I'm supposed to write. Thank you take care kind regards to All
  30. Sophie_M
    Community Moderator
    • Works for beyondblue moderating these forums
    Sophie_M avatar
    5905 posts
    12 April 2021 in reply to Guest 05
    Hi Malaika,

    This is a safe and non-judgmental place where users give and receive support to one another based on their own experience with mental health. We know it can take a bit of time to learn to navigate these forums. In terms of content, so long as your posts abide by the spirit and intent onf the community rules - https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/community-rules - you shouldn't have a problem. 

    You might find this thread about forum FAQs helpful: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/welcome-and-orientation/the-forum-faq-thread-
    1 person found this helpful

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