I believe the best way to go is to memorise what's meant to be on those trolleys, so when I stand back on completion, I can allow my brain to make sense of what's missing. A bit like working out what's missing from the snapshot in my head. I'll give it a go anyhow.
I work with a wonderful lady who pulled me up on a bad habit I have. She said 'You have this terrible habit of saying how bad your memory is. You need to stop telling yourself that and start telling yourself your memory is good. When you remember things, you have to congratulate yourself every time'. She's right. Telling myself how bad it is becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. It's kinda like 'You're memory is bad, don't forget this!', which is amusing in a way when you think about it; one thing I can always remember is how bad my ability to remember is :)
JM, our work environment can play a major role in regard to our self-esteem. Working in the care industry, 99.9% of the people I work with are deeply caring people. We all bring out the best in each other. After over a decade of being a stay at home mum, I re-entered the workforce just over a couple of years ago. I had virtually zero confidence and my work colleagues have raised me thoughtfully and with great support to greater confidence. Incredibly reassuring people. So, the question might be, for you, 'Am I in the most nurturing and supportive environment when it comes to raising my self-esteem?' The people around us can play a major role in how we perceive our self.
You mention your ideas are complicated which leads me to wonder whether you hold some ability in working out complex things. You might say 'I can't do that. I don't have the ability to see the intricacies of things' yet I easily imagine you might. If you've ever been led to think, when looking at an object/situation/person 'I wonder how that/he/she works', you're naturally wonderful. Playing 'follow the leader', if we follow the lead of wonder, it can lead us to study exactly how something or someone works. I'm often wondering how I work, as a rather quirky person, some might say. I always seek answers when it comes to knowing myself better. We are complex creatures JM!
Do you ever wonder how or why you work the way you do? I remember low self-esteem and depression well and I recall how easy it can be to led to statements, as opposed to wonder. Replacing 'I am hopeless!' with 'I wonder why and how I am led to hope less' turns us into a curious detective.