This is my first time posting anything so I’m sorry if what I say is wrong or if it makes no sense, I’m a little nervous about this. I’m just gonna share a few things, and ask for some thoughts.
Whenever I talk to some of my friends, it feels like everyone is ignoring me. I could say something or ask a question and then the topic changes, at it doesn’t happen all the time but it happens enough to the point that I’m starting to think this way.
I could say a joke then, someone might say “that’s not funny”, or “that’s disgusting”, but then someone else a few minutes later says word for word what I said, and everyone laughs. It confuses me and then I think to myself, am I the problem?
In that group of friends, one of them I’m good friends with, but sometimes she does stuff that make me question weather or not she want to be friends at all. We might say let’s play a game in a few minutes, the she’s playing with another person and says she’ll play in an hour, when I ask why she didn’t say to the other person that she said she was gonna play with me, she says she forgot, (granted this has only happened twice). Another time I asked if she wanted to do something on the weekend, she said she couldn’t cause she was doing family stuff, then I hear from other friend that they were all going out somewhere and not only was this about a few days after I asked her, but none of them invited my until about 10pm the night before.
This next part is me hating my self. In short, I’m fat. I know I am and I’m trying to lose weight, but I wake up one morning with so much confidence, but then a week later I’m back to where I started. I’m trying to go on a low carb diet, so that I can burn more fat because I’m not interested in building a lot of muscle, but
1. My dad is feeding me a lot of carbs and when I told him I wanted to diet he just told me I don’t know what I’m talking about
2. The people around me aren’t supportive at all, whenever I get back from what ever workout I was doing, I might tell them what I did, they just say they don’t care and what ever I did was nothing compared to what they can do.
for the most part, the only 2 reasons I want to keep going is so that no one can call me fat again, and so that I’m not ashamed of who I am and I can finally be looked at as an equal rather than dirt.
I’m sorry if what I’ve said is just “teen issues” I just have no one to ask for help and I wanted to know if anyone has gone through something similar and knows how to cope.